Family problems

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There have been a magnitude of problems, going on between some of my family members. They involve my dad, aunt, grandpa and Nana and my oldest cousin. My grandpa has been on Dialisys for a few months, already, and he ended up in the hospital, last week. My dad has been commuting back and forth for those two days, to see him. My dad was very stressed out about grandpa and Nana and work. My mum phones my Aunt J and told her not to phone the hospital, or ask for a ride, there. My aunt turned around and phoned my oldest cousin, and asked him to drive her to the hospital, when he had to go to a party, within 20 minutes. My cousin told her, no. My aunt stewed around, until the exact time that my dad got back from work, and she phoned him and demanded that he take her to the hospital. My dad told her, no. After that, she phoned the hospital and asked the nurse a shitload of questions, than she asked to talk to grandpa. My Nana has either Alziemer's Disease or Dementia, and nobody had realized how much grandpa was taking care of her, until he ended up in the hospital. Nana is really begining to lose it. She's forgetting dates, and she went shopping downtown White Rock and she forgot where she was. She's also forgetting to eat. I try to forget about it all, but I find it very hard to do so. All that I've wanted was for this to be a nice December for me, and it's going to the sewage.

i hope things work out

So sorry to read your posting and how hard things are right now. It sounds like a truckload of issues among the family members and perhpas you are the only thoughtful one in the bunch.

It also sounds like you are worried about your Nana, would it help just to focus on her for right nw and see if there is anything you can do to help her out? (With the AS when it comes to crises I have to think in terms of what I can and cannot do. For example I can't hop on public transporation and go somewhere, but I can cook a good meal and get on the phone and make calls.)

Whatever happens, be sure to eat well and get your rest--it will help in sorting this out.

-- keats

i'm sorry to hear about your family's health problems...

my parents are having issues too... my dad is up for gastric bypass and two knee surgeries.... and my mom is having heart issues that are causing her to randomly pass out and doctors can't find anything wrong per se...

are you close (geographically) to your family so you can support them and at least FEEL like you're helping? i ran all the way across a continent to go to school and really feel bad that i can't at least go visit my parents and spend time with them on the weekends ect.

i hope things get better. it's always good to talk about things like this.

my thoughts are with you

Sounds like some hard times... I have a friend who's going through some family difficulties right now, and I can see how exhausted it's making him.

All the good advice had already been said, and I'd like to second the "remember to take care of yourself" and "figure out what it is you can and can't do to help" bits...

Take care, I hope this resolves itself soon.

One of the really unfortunate things about getting older is having to deal with the mortality of the family members we care about. They really seem so much stronger when we are kids. I have been fortunate that my oldest aunts and uncles have remained in fairly good health. My great-grandmother died a few years ago at 101.

I wish you the best in these stressful times.

Thankyou to all of you.

Here's an update:

My dad got a call stating that part of my Grandpa's leg is going to be amputated. The call came through, yesterday. Dad and Nana have decided that the amputation would be best for my Grandpa. So what does my Aunt do? After being told not to phone the specialist, she phones the specialist's secretary. Than she called my dad a couple of nights ago, and asked him to do her a 'favour' and drive her to the hospital to see Grandpa. My dad wasn't in a good mood, because Grandpa was talking funny talk, because of the poison that's in the bad part of his leg. My dad put his foot down and told my Aunt not to ask him for any more favours. He told her that she isn't healthy enough to be in control. Grandpa is going to be put in Extended Care.