Girlfriend Ad

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Joined: 21 Jul 2010
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28 Dec 2012, 2:17 pm

^^^that makes sense, but in addition, emotional maturity means the first person is also willing to take responsibility for the fact that their actions and words can have consequences. people do not live in bubbles where they can say and do as they like with no effect, and to believe it is possible is actually quite immature.

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Fnord
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28 Dec 2012, 2:20 pm

Why not just say, "Girlfriend Wanted. Apply in Person"?

Or maybe, "Available & Approachable"?

Or just a simple, "Hello"?

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modelmaker
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28 Dec 2012, 3:55 pm

I would make the "advertizement" less detailed for 2 reasons;
1. Too much detail, puts people off IMO. I would include just the basics of ; location, age, & of course : single. Then any potential interest the communication can be made via fb message or emails.
2. Really, information such as you have is an "advertizement" , so as facebook membership is free for peeps who know each other, then such an advert is rather against facebook rules & you're at least open to ridicule & risk possibly anyone saying they're interested could be just spam, or worse if you respond to emails or click on links sent to you from strangers.

Another point is ; Who would see it apart from friends & friends of friends/aquaintencies ? ,
Even if your privacy settings are for "everyone/public" , then why would "jane public stranger" bother to look you up just on the off-chance you're single?,

Have you tried looking on Zoosk ? , I believe its a dating app thats part of the facebook network.
Like ALL dating sites; full access is not free, but a reasonable cost allows a subscriber to have full "privaleges" , a fee of around £45 gives 3 months membership (as I remember) & you have the option of paying via paypal.

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29 Dec 2012, 2:17 am

ShamelessGit wrote:

Janissy wrote:

ShamelessGit wrote:

About the emotional maturity requirement: Emotional maturity for me means that you recognize that your emotions are arbitrary and have no inherent value. This is a fact and I'm not interested in arguing about it. If you understand this, then you will not expect people to know what you are feeling without being told, and you will respect other people's feelings even when they differ from your own. It also means that you will not act on your emotions without thinking like a dumb animal. Emotions are often self-contradictory and drive you towards your goals without any awareness of purpose, so taking them at face value always leads to a mess.

This will be the dealbreaker for probably every woman who reads the ad.

Quote:

However, this does not mean that it's bad to have emotions, or even to be overwhelmed by them sometimes. It is only bad when you have no awareness of them.

This disclaimer will not mitigate that.

What it comes across as is "don't expect me to care about your feelings". Caring about the other person's feelings is major part of any healthy relationship.
That's a thing that really frustrates me about women. I've accepted that my feelings don't mean anything since I was a child, and I have to think like this every time I interact with any person. I guess women are just so used to everybody going out of their way to accommodate them, so they never have to figure this stuff out? I really feel like I'm dealing with a child whenever I have to interact with somebody who assumes that their emotions mean something to anybody but themselves.

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