Feeling Annoyed
Why am I so depressed?
I try and clear my mind of thoughts of social anxiety (no friends etc.) and try and think of happier things. I try and keep my mind active by going for a bike ride, or here on the computer, but it's still there in my mind.
The Risperdal I'm on is f*****g useless.
I was first on a low dose from November to December. It was useless. Couldn't see proper doctor, got stuck with a useless b***h who just fobbed off what our doctor who subscribed it to me said. Give him a higher dose? Why, it's just making me f*****g worse!!
I've been on the higher dose for 2 weeks and I'm going on it from December to January. And still, no progress.
I've told my psychologist this, and she's trying to think of suggestions and helping which don't help.
I feel hopeless in this down situation. I just want it to go away. I've tried many ways to try and rid of it. but to no avail.
I think it's because I don't have a friend (social anxiety) even though the Risperdal is meant to make pro-social. HA! Yeah right. It just makes me feel even more withdrawn.
I apologise for the language, but this depression is really annoying and I'm annoyed by it.
I'm sorry. I had to let that all out.
Maybe this is a phase? Although I've been feeling like this for about a week.
Oh well, something will turn out sooner or later.
Hi! What you are experiencing doesn't sound like depression. You are annoyed & mad as hell, concerned over your lack of a social life. I googled your risperdal & the feelings you describe might actually be side effects of your medicine. the 'b***h' who suggested you increase your dose; was she actually a doctor or some random person? That part of your post sounds weird. If you feel you just want to go away (providing this is not a euphenism for suicide) THEN DO SO! To hell with socializing. Because a group of NT's called society deem socializing important, normal & essential, doesn't mean you have to apply it to yourself! Find something you can do alone or online (something safe, of course) and take a break for a while. Nothing eases anxiety like the following; fill a bath with very hot (not hot enough to burn your skin) and add:1/2 cup each epsom salts, sea salt & baking soda. Add to this 3-4 drops of pure essential oil of lavender, 2 drops pure patchouli, 2drops pure ylang-ylang. You can decrease or increase the lavender or the salts, but more of the other essential oils can irritate your skin. Swish the water to blend everything in. You need to bring a tall glass of cool water (or something else non-alcohol, preferably caffeine& sugar-free since these substances can exacerbate anxiety & mess with your mood). you might choose to bring you favourite music or an easy to handle book. Then jump in & soak. lie back & let the heat, oils & water soothe you. I do this daily. The side effects are as follows: smooth clear glowing skin, better overall skin toning, a sense of balance & security knowing you can always retreat to your private spa, decreased aches & pains, improved sleep, bright eyes & peace of mind. It works, for me, better than anything else, for me. give it a try and let me know whether it helps you.
LoneWolf20
Tufted Titmouse
Joined: 9 Jan 2007
Posts: 46
Location: Burlington WI USA (Boring City or Boresville USA)
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