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Tyri0n
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04 Feb 2013, 12:13 pm

I think it's this, not my weird behavior (though this can't help), that goes the furthest in explaining my failure to develop social relationships appropriate to age level, or even appropriate to my ASD functioning level.

Does anyone else have this diagnosis? Mine was obtained at the same time as my ASD diagnosis. If so, what can you do to minimize it? Zoloft just makes me crazy, and other anxiety meds just make me sleepy and more autistic. So I don't really think meds are an option.



lightening020
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04 Feb 2013, 1:39 pm

I can relate to that bro. I don't think medication or supplements work :( I have been on Mirtazapine for awhile and I have recently tried Phenibut.

I can notice a little difference from each of them but nothing near what they were advertised as and the reviews that people gave them.

I honestly think the answer is in yourself and nothing else. I am giving this a try and I think you should too. A buddy of mine showed this to me

http://www.youtube.com/user/HealingMagic?feature=watch



justkillingtime
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04 Feb 2013, 1:42 pm

I have traits. I try not to hate myself, give myself some breaks regarding thinking the worst of me. I also try to be reasonable and not emotionally reactive about perceived rejection from others. Other people have their own problems. Their rejection of me (real or perceived) is no big deal. It may have nothing to do with me. Other people have their own issues they are dealing with. I have my good days and bad days. What I have the most difficulty with is avoiding anything that brings me stress. Then the stress never goes away because I am not dealing with it.


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redrobin62
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04 Feb 2013, 2:09 pm

I'm avoidant also. I think I just embrace it though because I'm not doing anything about it. My self esteem is in the basement. I feel people are better than me. hell, I'm shocked when folks on this forum reply to my questions and comments! I'm not anything special. Will I go out to an aspie meetup group? Maybe...with a gun pointed at my neck.



MCalavera
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04 Feb 2013, 4:45 pm

I don't have it, but a very close friend of mine does. I can tell it's not a pleasant condition for her (or anyone with it) to have. It might seem trivial to outsiders, and even unreasonable, but it is real to those who suffer from it.



AliceInAspieland
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05 Feb 2013, 4:40 am

It has been suggested to me that I might have this. The requirements suit me.


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identity
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05 Feb 2013, 8:24 am

Yes I have this also. I find it very frustrating as there doesn't seem to be much advice for how to deal with it other than don't avoid doing the difficult things which I can't fail to see the irony of. I think it makes every bit of interaction with people feel like such a struggle. I haven't tried medication so I don't know anything about that.



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07 Feb 2013, 10:47 pm

Hey, wooow, I had never head of this before, but I looked it up and made an online test and this is me 100%.

Explains a lot, really. Now I just need to know how to get rid of it. Someone please give me a pill that makes it disappear over night? Sorry, what? Something like that doesn't exist and I will probably be shy and alone for the rest of my life? Yeah, you're probably right.


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AliceInAspieland
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07 Feb 2013, 11:10 pm

I think that a lot of the problems I have stem from having low self-esteem.

Anyone feel the same?


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Hermes9
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08 Feb 2013, 11:40 am

It's not really unusual for people with AS to develop symptoms/behavior patterns of AVPD.

The key isn't drugs. The key is unlearning these patterns consciously.

We tend to have negative social experiences, because we're awkward, socially inexperienced and our social brains work quite differently.

This means our negative social experiences start very early in life.. And by very early, I mean from the moment we are put in group situations. Yes, even as early as pre-school.

So we have to dig back into our earliest experiences and work forward -- What conditioned us to be avoidant? What are we really avoiding -- The other or our own fears and insufficiencies?

The answers, as we dig them up, can be both startling and enlightening. It's not an easy process, but take it a little bit at a time.

A counselor is recommended if the process isn't working for you by yourself. At least modern psychology understands AVPD better than AS.



MrKnowItAll
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08 Feb 2013, 3:03 pm

redrobin62 wrote:
I'm not anything special...


Crap on that idea. People go around telling others (especially kids) "you're special because.." with some list of personal qualities, or "you're special because you're unique." It's idiotic. You're special because you exist. If you were the most boring, stupid, ugly and out of place person in the world, you'd still be special enough to be valued by others and certainly to value yourself. If you can't just make yourself believe this there are people who can help you do it.