Knowing what to say and what not to say

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Does anyone find this hard too?

I keep saying things and it upsets people and I don't know what not to say and what things are okay to say. I don't know if this is an AS thing or not but I'm trying real hard not to keep goofing up and I keep failing.

I have teh same problem.

It's an AS thing. I never know what to say, so I stay quiet, and everyone thinks I'm either very shy, or mentally challenged. Oh well.

The over logical thing again.. because in my mind, why utter words unless it's necessary or I'm asked a question, or have something interesting to say. Clearly, most ppl can talk endlessly, about Nothing! Lol. So when you're sitting there silent, especially in a group of ppl, someone will ask, why are you so quiet? Well it's like, what was or am I supposed to say?.. And of course they don't know.. something, though. Lol, so I guess.. just flap your lips up and down and go blah blah blah for hours on end. Sounds fun.

Okay, now this brings up a question I have for everyone. Maybe we can actually help each other somehow.. When you are in a situation where you may be expected to talk and being AS, you might even wanna talk but you can't cause you have nothing to say. Is it just, you should start discussing whatever comes to your mind? I have a huge array of interests and a busy mind, so there's always tons of interesting stuff I can talk about, but I usually need to be pryed to bring it up. I also worry about talking obsessively too much about one topic or something. Is there like, a limit on time spent on one topic before it becomes overloaded?

I also understand small talk supposedly has it's place, but with somebody you've already past that point with and are past smalltalk, it's then ok to just launch into at least slightly deeper topics? How far into a relationship is even required before you move into topics of substance? I seem to have the problems of ppl I'm close with like family I don't see why I need to smalltalk them anymore, but they don't enjoy constantly talking about heavy subjects so with them I can't go backwards to smalltalk.. and with acquaintances, I never grow beyond smalltalk for some reason.

Finding the right words to say usually isn't a problem for me, due to my circumstances. I'm always either at work or home, and my family and coworkers all know I have AS and basically deal with my being different, at least when they converse with me. Or if I plan ahead of time, like when I wormed my way out of suspension in high school because of a detailed analysis of the wording of the rulebook's definition of a fight. In any case, things tend to be more of an issue when customers try to strike up small talk that is more than the obligatory "How are you today?" "Fine, yourself?" "Alright." In that case I try to kill the issue, such as by explaining that I'm not a fan of the Nebraska Cornhuskers.

I think I lost my ex as my friend and I feel releaved about it. Whew. Now I don't have to worry about him anymore and keeping my commentments I made with him and then found them hard to keep or do thanks to me saying the wrong things.