How can you get a girlfriend if you have aspergers syndrome?

Post Reply New Topic

You sound EXACTLY like me and I had same end result with my wife.

I remember an Australian Dating Coach/Guru named Dan Bacon, who runs a rite/blog called "The Modern Man", he says he knows of more than 350 guys who are still a virgin at 30+ years of age, as in 30 and older.

I "waited" until age 27 for "RL" sex. Just didn't bother to pursue any girls into seduction until that time since I was "saving myself" for "the right one" which apparently didn't exist, and man, that was a depressing experience, because it seemed like all of the girls always ended up with someone else, therefore, I decided to give up on "saving myself" for the "special person" who didn't exist anyway, and ended up seducing someone's wife instead & lost my virginity to her (a hot-looking red-headed or was it reddish-brown or auburn-haired woman who looked like she was still 19 despite being in her 30s although she didn't really have any meat left in her breasts was the only real down-side). Had sex with her every day for a week until our phones got lost... I would have sex with her again every day if we meet again, and I would have her cos-play as all of the hottest long-haired video-game & animé-characters in existence, and make lots of pr0nz videos with her ! ^_^

I know I got bunches of other things I could & want to say but anyway, yeah, I met her at a social-function (a church of all places because I went their during their "free food" thing that they did on Wednesdays), the story was that a "friend" of hers raped her, and she was all looking for someone she could trust or something, and somehow I managed to give her comfort, putting my arms around her, telling her that everything will be fine since I can protect her (because my kung fu was bad-ass at the time), and basically acting all like her boyfriend from the get-go (THAT is the "secret" you guys, for getting a girl-friend, just decide that she's your girl-friend & ACT like her boy-friend from the beginning, even if she "says" that she has a boy-friend, she WILL dump him & stick with you if you proceed to make your "advances" upon her anyway, provided that she's not resisting your advances [and by "advances" I mean you're like actually putting your hands & stuff on her body & maybe even going so far as to give her a full-body massage], and feels like you're willing to keep her for the long-term & aren't just being used by you for some kind of one-night stand).

P.S.: It's EASIER to get a girl-friend who has had boy-friends than it is to get a girl-friend who's never had one before. Well, that might depend on age, but statistically speaking, I have found this to be statistically true from personal-experience.

I met a not so attractive girl then I turned her into a super model with my Asperger super intelligent brain. Now she is forever in love with me & can't live without me.

^^ looking good!

How'd you turn her into a model? Giving her makeup or stuff?
If not then she was always attractive.

Probably true, but the one that never had a bf before could be a lot more interesting. It could be viewed in another way too: Girls that had a lot of boyfriends are likely to be players and unable to form stable, long-term relationships.

An average woman might be ashamed of having a relationship with a person with aspergers...hell they would be ashamed having a relationship with a fellow neurotypical if they feared that neurotypical was too different or didn't fit in great with your average people. But who cares not every woman is an average woman, look to find fellow loners and freaks.

Wh.....what?

Truth to be told, she does look attractive (teen-wise) but certainly not due to your super intelligent brain.

That probably only works if they are unhappy with their boyfriend, or unhappy being single and happen to like you but if they're in a good relationship with their boyfriend, than you might just make them angry if you go with that plan.

I found out I am an Aspie almost three months ago.

I have never had a date with a woman.

I have a job, live alone in a nice house and am considered a 'high functioning' Aspie.

How would anyone suggest I get started in meeting women?

I welcome any advice from men and women, especially those who have had some success in this area.

That's unfortunate how someone would only like an aspie because of their appearance, status, or wealth. I myself do not select a partner based off of any of those conditions. How they act, their character, and the way they treat others, plays a more significant role in how I base my attraction to like someone.

hardest part is how to be confident and have high self-esteem if you have never had a girlfriend before, because guys who have had girlfriends, its easy for them to be confident and have high self-esteem because they have experience to fall back on to make themselves feel better

I'm not sure experience really helps like that, at least not as something to "fall back" on. The past is the past, and no amount of experience makes you any less alone after a breakup.

I never handled breakups well when I was younger, and my desperation to hold on to a relationship actually led to two of the most horrible experiences in my dating life. What helped was coming out of those two breakups and revaluating women and relationships. I don't mean thinking less of women as people, but just getting a more reasonable perspective of how to prioritize casual dating relationships and romantic LTRs. I started to see some women as being a little bit more like myself, not exactly in need of a relationship, but in need of a break from drama. That put us in a place of rest and healing, and the short NSA flings were a nice change. Experience only shows that things do get better.

Also, without experience, you're in a Catch-22. What you have to be careful about is not getting too terribly attached to first dates and gfs. Don't assume you'll get a second date after your first. Don't assume the first girl you go on 4-8 dates with will be your gf. And don't assume your first gf will stay with you very long. Once you go through your first breakup, expect a mixed bag of casual dates and serious relationships. You'll know you've found "the one" because she's the one you can't run off. She knows how you act when you think nobody's looking and she doesn't care. She thinks you fart glitter. And neither of you really like anyone else, so why not? Anyway, without experience it's going to be really rough. But that's the only way you get experience. Don't let lack of experience get you down. Pay your dues and you'll enjoy the fruits of your labor soon enough.

ya i bet you had your first girlfriend in either your teens or early 20's, ya thats been a problem for me over the years, often times when i get a date with a girl i don't end up getting a second date, ya how do you avoid getting too terribly attached to the first dates and gf's?

At least you get first dates. I can't even get first dates. It feels like rocket science would be easier than attempting to get a date.