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conundrum
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03 Oct 2013, 11:46 am

bumble wrote:
But then I always did find 'normal' boring. I believe that was my reply when my parents once asked me if I could "at least try to be more normal please". My response was "normal is boring". Unusual has always fascinated me.


I've been saying this for years--well before I even knew about AS.

:thumright: :cheers:


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'It happened of its own accord.' -Tao Te Ching, Verse 17


anneurysm
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03 Oct 2013, 3:16 pm

I second (third? fourth?) the advice to "be yourself". Taken literally, it's generally not good advice for people on the spectrum, or for anyone, for that matter. Being *completely* yourself is not well received by most people.

Some time later, I realized that "be yourself" *actually* means to reveal bits and pieces of yourself in the context of the environment you are in. So, for example, when you are just getting to know someone, you should not go on about your life story, tell the person highly personal information or talk at length about a special interest (unless you have it in common). People want to know you, but not every single bit of you...a mistake I made all the time in the past.

People, expect, however, that you reveal some basic personal things about yourself and to let parts of your personality shine through within respect to basic social conventions. This is something I often didn't do because I thought people would assume that I was weird. But I'm talking about basic things I reveal to people: that I am funny and fun-loving, that I love helping others, am passionate about human behavior and I love cats.


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Backstory: diagnosed with borderline,"tentative" Aspergers at 7, but don't fit the criteria now (according to my longtime psychiatrist). I self-identify as having ASD traits rather than the whole diagnosis.

Mostly keeping a distance from ASD-related things (including WP) but I'll always be interested in it despite the recent separation of it from my identity.


Daydreamer86
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03 Oct 2013, 3:27 pm

"Alcohol gives you confidence-if you drink, you'll feel more social".

"You just need to talk more!"


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My blog on life with Aspergers.


conundrum
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03 Oct 2013, 10:36 pm

Daydreamer86 wrote:
"Alcohol gives you confidence-if you drink, you'll feel more social".


VERY. BAD. IDEA. 8O

Daydreamer86 wrote:
"You just need to talk more!"


About...?


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The existence of the leader who is wise
is barely known to those he leads.
He acts without unnecessary speech,
so that the people say,
'It happened of its own accord.' -Tao Te Ching, Verse 17


SplinterStar
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03 Oct 2013, 11:35 pm

Hmm... worst advice ever?

"Try blending in with others"

HAHAHAHA like that's EVER going to happen. i cant even small talk a cat.



tweety_fan
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04 Oct 2013, 7:01 am

I have got the "be yourself" speech before. It was about as useful as being told to "do a barrel roll!."



bumble
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04 Oct 2013, 7:05 am

tweety_fan wrote:
I have got the "be yourself" speech before. It was about as useful as being told to "do a barrel roll!."


LOL the people on this forum board are funny. You tickle my sense of humour (in a nice way).



Asperger96
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04 Oct 2013, 8:31 am

If I [i]weren't[i] being myself than you wouldn't have a problem with the way I'm acting