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jrjones9933
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05 Apr 2014, 6:45 am

Robdemanc wrote:
When people say "ogling" what do they mean? Does it mean looking at someone?

If so, ogling can take place anywhere, it doesn't have to be in a shower. I would not say it is unacceptable or shameful, at most I would say it is discourteous. Some people find it flattering. Some people like showing off and having people look at them. Straight men check each other out anyway.


Ogling means openly staring without concern for the person's discomfort, as though the other person was, say, an object.



Ann2011
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05 Apr 2014, 6:57 am

heavenlyabyss wrote:
I think this thread is funny.

If it were up to me, locker rooms would have cubicles regardless of whether I am with straight or gay men. It doesn't mean sh** to me whether the other guy is gay or not. I just don't like having my naked body exposed to everyone. Is that weird or something? Yeah, actually it is. It's unnatural but it's how we are socialized to be.

I think it's funny that humans wear clothes. Stupid brains. No other animal wears clothes. Only human beings. It's like - oh, I am going to put on my tuxedo and be all civilized. But really it's just a f***ing tuxedo and underneath all that you are just an animal. People are so crazy.

It all makes sense when you find yourself in the middle of a Canadian winter.


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Robdemanc
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05 Apr 2014, 9:04 am

jrjones9933 wrote:
Robdemanc wrote:
When people say "ogling" what do they mean? Does it mean looking at someone?

If so, ogling can take place anywhere, it doesn't have to be in a shower. I would not say it is unacceptable or shameful, at most I would say it is discourteous. Some people find it flattering. Some people like showing off and having people look at them. Straight men check each other out anyway.


Ogling means openly staring without concern for the person's discomfort, as though the other person was, say, an object.


Thanks.

I have had this done to me and yes it is uncomfortable. But it's impossible to stop someone doing it unless you give them a threatening stare back.



jrjones9933
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05 Apr 2014, 9:37 am

People 40 years ago would never have believed that date rape would be considered rape today. Attitudes can change, but better than a glare from the "object" would be disapproval from other "actual people," i.e. peer group.



Robdemanc
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05 Apr 2014, 11:57 am

jrjones9933 wrote:
People 40 years ago would never have believed that date rape would be considered rape today. Attitudes can change, but better than a glare from the "object" would be disapproval from other "actual people," i.e. peer group.


Most people learn that it is rude to stare, so peer groups know this. But there will be some people who will stare, and if it is uncomfortable for the 'object' then they cannot rely on others to express disapproval. The place I come from it was usual for lads to pick fights with anyone staring at them.



jrjones9933
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05 Apr 2014, 12:54 pm

Robdemanc wrote:
Most people learn that it is rude to stare, so peer groups know this.


They know it in the abstract, yes, but norms vary and many groups of men consider it normal, acceptable and inevitable to ogle women. It will stop when enough people in those groups begin to express their disapproval of the practice.