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ReticentJaeger
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03 Apr 2014, 12:03 am

When I get sensory overload, I become extremely agitated. I begin imagining myself hurting the people who caused it and listening to their screams. Then, possibly out of guilt, I experience suicidal thoughts.

Similar things also happen when I become frustrated and hopeless, as they just did. A few minutes ago, I got frustrated over nothing (I'm still not entirely sure what set me over the edge) and became angry. I pictured myself brutally shoving someone into a wall and threatening them. These thoughts were immediately followed by a sudden urge to slit my wrist. I knew I shouldn't do it. I looked at my wrist and found that the small distance between the surface of my skin and my veins worried me; I didn't do it.

The frightening thing is, it takes very little to set me off. One startling sound sends me spiraling into my own personal hell. In two seconds I transition from content to angry, homicidal, and depressed.

I'm wondering if this is BPD, as I've had a sort of dissociation problem. I generally feel nonexistent and unimportant.



ExoMuseum
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Joined: 27 Mar 2014
Age: 27
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03 Apr 2014, 1:56 am

i dont know what this is, but i know the same thing happens to me a lot!
i also sometimes act out, and i get violent, and if im angry enough i dont remember anything later. i mean, i know that i hurt somebody, but i just kind of black out



ReticentJaeger
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05 Apr 2014, 11:41 pm

I'm thinking it could be a combination of BPD and anxiety. I know I have severe anxiety problems, but I'm not sure about BPD. I have a few symptoms.