Which did you find harder, uni or work?

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MissDorkness
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08 Jul 2014, 8:56 am

kraftiekortie wrote:
You're doing great, Miss Dorkness! Truly you are!

:oops: Thanks. By all outward measures I certainly am.
Inside, I still feel like a scared little kid who never fit in, or, as they say in the women in technology talks I've been to "imposter syndrome"... like someone's going to suddenly discover that I don't belong and make me leave.

:roll: Bit silly when I say it aloud, though. :lol:



RetroGamer87
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08 Jul 2014, 11:12 am

charlie92 wrote:
Anyway, sorry I didn't check back on this thread sooner.

No worries.
charlie92 wrote:
How old are you anyway?

I'm 26 and dreading every birthday.
charlie92 wrote:
I'm really not sure what you mean by 'contaminative bias'

I meant confirmation bias. The idea that people will find evidence that supports ideas they already have instead of neutrally gathering evidence in order to got an objective conclusion.
charlie92 wrote:
Quote:
I don't think I'd even bother living on campus in the first place.

I didn't, really. In my first year I shared a house about a mile away with some other students who for whatever reason weren't in dorms. It was essentially the same experience that people had in dorms though. After that, I got my own little apartment which was much better for a hermit like me. :P

Close enough. I didn't even move out of home 'till I was 25 and that only lasted six months, not because I was unable to be independent... more like it wasn't independent enough. I had some conflicts with my house mate and the lease was in his name. That's the last time I'll move in with someone I've never met before. I guess I'm a part of the boomerang generation. A little apartment? Great minds think alike. For the last couple of weeks I've been trying to get my hands on this granny flat I spotted a few streets away.

As for campus for a while I had this idea that I was missing out on some amazing social scene but that may've been exagerated in my mind. After all people are there to study and it takes me a while to intergrate into groups anyway (like most aspies).
charlie92 wrote:
I guess I just wasn't used to having a class of 100 students where you never actually speak to the professor and he doesn't have the time to help everyone.

Sounds tricky. Not even being able to ask for clarification. Also sounds completely unlike the community college I went to which had only small classrooms, not lecture halls.
charlie92 wrote:
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Motivation is difficult for me because I already have enough money to live on without working.

Yes, but the thing is unless you're super rich, it won't last indefinitely. I'm kinda the opposite I guess with this - even when I do have money, I'm scared of the inevitable times where I will not have money. :/

I didn't mean to give the impression that I was living off savings or independently wealthy. What I meant was that I receive a rather generous pension from the state and my razor thin living costs (except for running a car) leave me with a decent level of disposable income.

Yes there is a chance they could cancel my pension since the new prime minister seems to be extremely conservative but at the moment he seems to be more concerned with crippling the unemployment benefit, not the disability pension. He's not very popular so I don't think he'll get reelected anyway.

Anyway, I just want to clarrify that I'm not refusing to work. I did a lot that in the past but those days are over for me. I had years of doing nothing followed by years of doing a job that was insultingly easy. I'm definitely going to resign from that and I'm definitely going to to try to get another job.

So I'm no longer struggling with the question of should I work at all or should I keep my current job. What I'm struggling with is should I get a new job which is unskilled and less than 30 hours per week (the pension stops if I work more than 30 hours in a week) or should I spend a few years studying (the pension doesn't stop due to study so there's no need for me to work my way through college) and then get a professional job.

I mean, getting a part time unskilled job seems a lot safer in my mind. Partly because it won't dominate my life and partly because I can start trying to get one straight away. I don't like taking risks but long term risks are the worse for me because I don't even get to see if the risk paid off for a few years. At least with this scheme if it works I'll know it worked straight away. Also I'd be getting decent money from little work. I mean, $1,000 a fortnight plus wages from a part time job and both of them free from income tax (other people in Australia pay relatively high income tax thanks in part to sods like me).

So that's one choice. The other choice is as I said is going to uni and then getting a more professional job. This could take longer to pay dividends. I'd have a bit less money for next few years since I probably wouldn't be working I'd be living on the pension alone and have to pay uni related expenses (not tuition, that can be on loan). I'd be slightly worse off financially in the short term but as MissDorkness will attest other students have had it a lot rougher than that.

Now you paint a grim picture of uni, not that I doubt you're telling the truth. It could be like that for me. A few years ago I was completely against going to uni but after I talked to a few uni students I thought maybe it wouldn't be quite so bad but... the thing I couldn't deal with was the idea that if I got a degree, the resultant job would be far harder than uni itself. The hours could be longer but... like you were saying about how it's harder to study without any help from the professor, well, it's sort of like that with jobs. With the lower level jobs you have supervisors or managers. You can ask them questions and they'll tell you if you're doing something wrong. In the higher level jobs you have to sit down at your desk and figure out how to most productively spend the day by yourself without any prompting at all (this is according to one of my career councillors). Maybe I could do that I was very familiar with the job but even than I have a habit of focussing on one task at a time. My organisational skills are poor even for tasks I'm familiar with (hence my single tasking).

So if I could get by with an easier job than why would I want to get a pro job? Well a few years ago I did absolutely nothing and now I'm ashamed of that but somehow it feels like getting an unskilled part time job is nearly as shameful as doing nothing or that such jobs are only meant for teenagers to do while they study not for 26 years olds to do while not studying. And soon I'll be 30, then 40.

I've asked a lot of people in meatspace as well and the funny thing is I get a different response depending on how I frame the question. If I ask if I should go to uni and get a pro job people always say yes but if I ask if it's shameful to have a working class job people always say no. I'm not sure if I can consider that to be useful advice if the answer varies depending on how I frame the question because it seems to much like an experiment without proper controls or a survey with leading questions.
charlie92 wrote:
I'm 21, and I find it ridiculous that people expect us to know what we want to do with our lives at my age or younger.

Yeah and I guess I shouldn't be so hard on myself for not having a complete plan the moment I graduated from high school (actually I did have a complete plan it just wasn't a very good one). I'm sure if I went to uni I wouldn't be the only undergrad there who's more than 18 years old.

And maybe even at 26 I shouldn't blame myself for being indecisive or feel like I must start a degree right away because it's ?now or never?. I dropped out of college when I was 20 and I think I've changed a great deal since then like anyone would between 20 and 26 so bearing that in mind, I probably won't see things the same way when I'm 32 so maybe I don't have to plan out my whole life right at the moment.
MissDorkness wrote:
So, I've been feeling stressed about not pulling in as much income as I did last year... even though my husband got an increase in work this year that makes up for it.
I just feel like I'm slacking.
I've never worked this little before and I feel like I'm tempting fate or slacking off.

But, then I realize that it's totally mental and plenty of people only work one job, and I can be just like them.
I'm working on it.

:) Yeah, no need to feel guilty for working only one full time job. Remember at the moment my job is eight hours a week :lol:

Still I can sort of understand stressing about not working enough because I've been doing the same thing lately except my version of ?not working enough? is about an order of magnitude lower than yours. As you said many would consider one full time job to be a perfectly acceptable amount of work.

Trying to hoard work when you don't need to due to events in your past reminds me of famine victims who continue hoarding food even after they've regained a stable food supply. I think you've earned the right to an easier life.

Wasn't that what you were trying to get in the first place? I mean you were already able to support yourself before you got a degree so I figure that means you had the goal of supporting yourself more easily after you got a degree.

Any since you're no longer moonlighting there's this new thing you might want to check out called free time :)
But seriously not working during every waking moment does not make you a slacker. I should know because I'm an expert slacker.

Imposter syndrome? When in a low mood (though my mood improved as I wrote this post) I feel more like an imposter not at work but at life. Like a basement dwelling manchild (if only my Mum's house had a basement than I could complete the stereotype :lol:)

It's statistically likely that some of your coworkers have imposter syndrome. It harkens back to that age old question that everyone seems to ask between about 20 and 40 ?when will I start feeling like an adult? (that could be a good question for a thread sometime).



MissDorkness
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08 Jul 2014, 11:35 am

It just feels wrong to turn down work, when I spent so many years hustling for gigs and building a reputation as someone who would do work when asked. :wink: Old habits die hard.

I know you're right and I'm still trying to internalize the logic.

:lol: Probably a pretty apt analogy.

Yeah, initially was a need to get medical coverage, then it was a drive to provide for my kids the things that I never had growing up (safe place to live, plentiful school supplies and class fees, special exhibits at the museums, decent food, etc).
Yeah, now the student loans and second mortgage are wearing on my mind. I've always been debt-free and owing anything is intolerable... not to mention the cost of the interest.

Heh, yeah, I've been able to cook more again, which everyone in the family is happy about.


:D

RetroGamer87 wrote:
MissDorkness wrote:
So, I've been feeling stressed about not pulling in as much income as I did last year... I just feel like I'm slacking.
I've never worked this little before and I feel like I'm tempting fate or slacking off.
But, then I realize that it's totally mental and plenty of people only work one job, and I can be just like them.

:) Yeah, no need to feel guilty for working only one full time job. Remember at the moment my job is eight hours a week :lol:

Still I can sort of understand stressing about not working enough because I've been doing the same thing lately except my version of ?not working enough? is about an order of magnitude lower than yours. As you said many would consider one full time job to be a perfectly acceptable amount of work.

Trying to hoard work when you don't need to due to events in your past reminds me of famine victims who continue hoarding food even after they've regained a stable food supply. I think you've earned the right to an easier life.

Wasn't that what you were trying to get in the first place? I mean you were already able to support yourself before you got a degree so I figure that means you had the goal of supporting yourself more easily after you got a degree.

Any since you're no longer moonlighting there's this new thing you might want to check out called free time :)
But seriously not working during every waking moment does not make you a slacker. I should know because I'm an expert slacker.

Imposter syndrome? When in a low mood (though my mood improved as I wrote this post) I feel more like an imposter not at work but at life. Like a basement dwelling manchild (if only my Mum's house had a basement than I could complete the stereotype :lol:)

It's statistically likely that some of your coworkers have imposter syndrome. It harkens back to that age old question that everyone seems to ask between about 20 and 40 ?when will I start feeling like an adult? (that could be a good question for a thread sometime).



RetroGamer87
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08 Jul 2014, 12:18 pm

I'm surprised you didn't qualify for medicaid, not that I know the details of the American healthcare system but isn't it given to those on a low income?



MissDorkness
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08 Jul 2014, 1:06 pm

RetroGamer87 wrote:
I'm surprised you didn't qualify for medicaid, not that I know the details of the American healthcare system but isn't it given to those on a low income?

I had medicaid, until my mother got a raise which lost me benefits in high school... and then right before I started college she got married to a guy who made some decent money.
You can't even apply for financial aid (grants and loans) on your own until you're 22 or married, so, I had to work multiple jobs to pay cash for books and tuition (for my Associate's degree).
BUT, since I worked those multiple jobs, I was actually earning above the "poverty line" and therefore couldn't qualify for medical aid from the state.

Sort of a catch-22. I could work half as much and get medical coverage, but, then I would've had to stop going to school, thereby sticking me in that cycle.
It was kind of a gamble, but, it worked out in the end.



nldedout
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08 Jul 2014, 4:36 pm

I found college and graduate school much easier than working. A good uni is a really supportive environment for everyone, and you can tailor your curriculum and major to your strengths. There are accommodations for disabilities that are much easier to get implemented than in a workplace. I had an easier time making friends in college and grad school than any other time, as quirky people were valued. Other perks: much more flexible schedule than a typical job, if you're on campus you don't have to cook if you don't want / everything you need and all your friends are on campus too. My happiest times in my adult life were in school, I've struggled in the work world much more.



nikaTheJellyfish
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11 Jul 2014, 5:27 pm

I love uni so much I am planning to stay as a professor. It's consistent, stable, keeps me engaged with others without having to do to many social things and I can major in a special interest area. I get a few accommodations from my university. I love online classes and would love to teach some online classes as well at some point in my life. I've taught a few classes in person and LOVE it. For me, uni is an ideal environment. I wouldn't trade it for anything. Some days it's a hassle and a headache, but it's still worth it.



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15 Jul 2014, 5:26 am

I work in the same area as my study. Because I now live in a mining town, I enjoyed uni a lot more. Uni was relaxed with constant projects/assignments to do and things to keep your mind busy. Less rules, less people you 'had' to be around, and my uni was a pretty supportive environment. I reckon work is 'easier' but uni was more fun!


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15 Jul 2014, 5:29 am

MissDorkness wrote:

Inside, I still feel like a scared little kid who never fit in, or, as they say in the women in technology talks I've been to "imposter syndrome"... like someone's going to suddenly discover that I don't belong and make me leave.

:roll: Bit silly when I say it aloud, though. :lol:


Amen, sister. Same here in women in mining talks....


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