Why do people think that life is a race?

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Everyone develops at their own pace. I am so sick of people acting like that you have to complete certain things by a certain age and if you don't there is something wrong with you. If you are still living with your parents after 18, never dated, never held a job, taking longer to finish school, haven't lost your virginity by a certain age, etc, people think that there is something wrong with you. Life is not a contest. There is nothing wrong with being a late bloomer with things. I am sick and tired of society putting pressure on everyone to have certain things completed by a certain age. Why can't we just live our lives without society telling us how we should live? Most of us Aspies are late bloomers in everything. I am sick of society judging and looking down upon us just because we are different. Success comes to everyone at different times. Some people don't find success or someone to be with until late in life. What is so bad about that?

Life is a condition.

Competition is a societal imposition.

Only those who are cut off from society do not have a need to compete.

That's why mountaintop monasteries were invented -- for people to draw away from society and shun competition.

Despite the fact that I've always been a confirmed agnostic:

I used to want to be a monk.

I still fantasize, at times, about being a monk in a 7th century AD monastery which overlooks the sea in western Ireland.

I just want at least a bit of heaven to descend to these parts.

Well there is one thing. You absolutely have to die by the time you are dead. Other then that its kinda at your own pace.

Yeah, there used to be more of an social acceptance of self imposed isolation. I suppose people still allow for one to 'get away from it all', but really they are thinking cruise ship or beach 5 star hotel mostly. And you better be back in two weeks or definitely are weird.

They call it a race. They are running as hard as they can. They don't realize they rats on wheels going nowhere.

Because, even if you're not a part of society, it is a race.

And quite frankly, it makes a difference what you accomplish at what age.

Sad to say, but it's indeed the truth. You don't race, you don't win, as they say. But there are some people who can race and can even cheat the race and still lose every time.

It makes me sad. They are all running toward "Happiness." Racing to get there before all the "happiness" is gone. Afraid the other, bigger, faster, more aggressive people will take all the happiness and there won't be enough left.

And so many of them spend their whole lives chasing the happiness that's supposed to be right over the horizon that they never get to enjoy all the joy ripening right around them. And when they get to where they were going, happiness is once again right over the horizon...

...and the funny thing about the horizon is that it's always in front of you, no matter which way you're facing or where you are. When you get there, it isn't the horizon any more.

It's like the book, "I Had Trouble In Getting To Solla Sollew."

I don't get sad with being judged for where I'm at too often (or stay that way for too long anyway) any more. I think I've finally learned from my dad's example. Where-ever he was at, he poured a cup of coffee, rolled a joint, took a deep breath, and was happy. He mastered the art of holding out his hand and sitting perfectly still until the Bluebird of Happiness decided to land in it.

I DO get sad with being pushed and pushed and pushed to train my kids to Chase Happiness.

I watch my poor husband, compulsively running in his wheel, scared of getting back in it every morning and more scared to just quit running. My heart breaks for him. It has made us materially quite wealthy...

...and he's so stressed he can't enjoy it, or even see it. We have cars that run, and a very nice doublewide that we own free and clear, and a back yard larger than some urban playgrounds, and happy healthy kids, and he's so stressed I hear every week about how we're barely making it.

Cause it's easier to keep a society dulled by convincing them they have to be perfect rather than simply being creative.

Methinks successful people need some way to justify their having wasted a lot of time on nonsense, and thus crave superiority status.

Same reason people get surferdudeophobia.

I don't get it either....what exactly is everyone racing towards anyways.

Self-reliance, independence, freedom to choose one's own destiny ... steak instead of Spam ... fine wine instead of Kool-Aid ... four bedrooms, 3 baths, and a veranda overlooking the ocean instead of a spare room in the back at mum's place ... autonomy ... being able to help one's friends when they need it, instead of being the one looking for help ... dignity ... redress of wrongs in a court of law ... hosting homeless people instead of being one of them ...

meh...... , I guess there are those things though wouldn't really want a house that big at least not to myself if friends/family wanted to go in on rent then I'd consider it, but why does it have to be a race to get there? That bit seems like a human construct, which means it does not have to be that way, just is and its what people are used to.

Kool-aid over wine though? I think a pint of cheap beer is a little more likely as kool-aid does not contain alcohol, unless you get something hard to mix with it of course but then kool-aid isn't a very good thing for mixed drinks.