Rants

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Attention tennis fans in the stands,

Stop being so loud! When a player is trying to serve-shut up-and put away the cameras already. The flash is blinding.

Misophonia rant - Shut up. Just SHUT UP! It's not hard. People seem to have this constant and pointless level of just noise noise noise! I just had two people successively get up to use the bathroom when I am up late at night. They walk in and groan, start going "Mm-hm" and "uh-huh" for no reason, burp and then groan again, repeatedly mumble things like "oh, dear" when there is no reason to, sigh loudly with a sort of whine like a dog, then get a drink of water even though there is water in their rooms, gulp the water so audibly I could hear it from the next room, then do this repeatedly and sigh "ahh" after every sip, then burp again, then groan again when they finish, then walk back to their rooms literally making random grunts.
Just shut the **** up!! ! I literally had to put my fingers in both ears to shut it out. Maybe it's misophonia, but if I am going around doing things like this, I do so absolutely silently. There is no reason to make a noise. The only time I am making random noise is a stim I have when I get stressed or threatened, which is to hum completely tunelessly. And even that serves some purpose, being an autistic stim which calms me. It annoys the shite out of me people just being LOUD for no reason, and I rather nastily wonder if they would make any noise if no one was around to give them attention for doing so.
/ rant.

Please stop f*****g with my head.

I feel all anxious now. That isn't fair.

^You don't mean me do you?

If so, there must be some misunderstanding

^ hahaha, yes Froya, you .

No, my dad lol.

^That's good to hear. I must admit I thought it was pretty strange if it had been me

If your dad is playing mind games, that is not good.

I often thought my fathers face didn't match what he was saying. Sometimes I tried confronting him of obvious lies, but he just denied them. Like I was crazy for even saying such a thing. I wonder if he believes his own lies.

^No, you don't have to reply. I wasn't expecting any reply. If you feel you have to reply that's wrong too you know. By replying you give something back, and you shouldn't feel you have to give something back.

I was thinking about my reply to you yesterday several times, because I felt I gave it so little effort. It has nothing to do with you of course, it's just the mental state I'm in at the moment. If it actually made you feel better though, that's good!

You deserve so much more though

I'd do EVERYTHING to get rid of rhinitis. ANYTHING!!

It doesn't matter what my functioning level is, or my neurology would be, or gender, or health status, or suffering with some evil doer's karma...
As long as I have been constantly sneezing the crap out of my time, everything screws up and I get no peace, no matter what situation or whatever's in my mind.

Gained Number Post Count (1).
Lose Time (n).

Lose more time here - Updates at least once a week.

I can't stop worrying about anything, and I am freaking sick of it. Stuff that sends me into extreme worry mode keeps appearing all the bloody time, and it is like torture. It's been happening for a while now, and I feel like I'm going to have a massive panic attack or something, if the pains in my chest are something. It needs to stop......

JUST END IT ALL! I am really tired of these anxiety problems....

wow i f*****g love getting off my 8hr night shift and coming home to your angry ass.
f**k you.

Yikes, I just found out Rafael Nadal is fighting an ear infection. Please get well, Rafa, and be in good shape to play, and win, in Madrid.

I feel like I can't even rant here now.
I'm ranting about not being able to rant.

I suppose I need to forget everyone.
I was born, I blinked, and then it was over.