How angry and hateful can ASP or aspergers get? How about U?

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MudoMan
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03 Jun 2015, 10:56 am

Of course the media has reported people like Adam Lanza had aspergers. And now apparently James Holmes the theater massacre guy claims he had aspergers in his writtings....but how angry or crazy can you get and do you think any of these killers could attribute their their actions on some of their aspergers or ASD issues?

For me in my teens I was extremely pissed and hateful at life and the world and totally depressed. I think since I had a mom who cared and also came from a Christian home I learned about right from wrong and compassion but over time I knew I would not want to murder people, but I could care less if people died on their own or some other way.

I would get so pissed at the bullies and popular kids. I would get mad at idiots at the store who act stupid, or people who drive crazy and almost cause a wreck or speed by me or wont let me over in a lane. I also would get so pissed and angry over stupid people and felt like no one loved me or cared.

I dont think I would ever go do some violence, but I know I could snap like if some jack or preppy cool kid made fun of me I might go into a rage and fight him and beat him up and not care if I get hurt in the process. But it never happened.

I calmed down a lot but I can get angry and feel mad but I can control it now.

Is anyone else really angry or aggressive or feel like life is worthless? I dont think life is worthless but I was starting to believe it is. I still have depression and feelings of hopelessness though.

Do you think some of these murderers can actually blame some of their feelings on their conditions? Or is their murders or violence something else?

I also want to say in college I had a roomate who I knew was weird. but I look normal, and I knew I was kind of odd, but no one could tell unless they spend time around me. My roomate looked more nerdy and was fat but bulky. He was asian too and had glasses and had a weird facial expression. Like zoned out. He openly told me he has aspergers or autism. I was very sensitive about it and he was always cool with me. but he could get extremely pissed off about nothing or supid things and no one would want to talk to him, or girls would not like him. One day he threatened to shoot up everyone at thge university and another friend who happened to be with him heard it. He reported it to the campus security and the police got involved. They arrested my roomate at 2am in my dorm room. I was shocked. I feel bad for him because I dont think he would have done it or really wanted to and he was just talking nonsense because he was angry. But it was quite an experience.

I also had a mohawk at the time and people thought i was a jerk or mean so after that I think a lot of people thought I might also be dangerous because I was his roommate. They frisked me too. A semester later I had another roommate who was very popular especially with women. He was a sociopath though an a narcissist and he really was a jerk to a female friend I knew. When he knew I was taking her side he went crazy and thought up a scheme to try and get me arrested. He was also dating another crzy and sociopathic chick who was super hot and they came up with an idea to say I threatened or assaulted her because I slammed a door in her face. Anyway it was stupid and the police did come but I was luckily on a trip to another city far away for 3 days. But the police didnt have anything to go on and said it was nothing and never came back. But campus security came to my room and threatened me with going to jail and accused me of threatening to harm the girl. but I never did! I told him what actually happened and he didnt want to believe it but was warning me they are watching me. It really sucked. College was a tough time.

So what about aspergers or ASD and violence or anger?



AspieUtah
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03 Jun 2015, 11:18 am

I dunno about violence, but I agree with the anger and hostility idea. I know several individuals with ASD who are hostile to ideas and opinions. Imagine their reactions to something of more substance than mere commentary.


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Adamantium
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03 Jun 2015, 4:00 pm

When I was young I was very, very depressed. Almost didn't make it past 12-13.

But since then, I get down sometimes, but life is good. I don't give a damn about popular people or other people's success. I am more interested in the things and people I like.

Some things make me angry and when I get angry it tends to flare up, but then dies away quickly--like a matchhead.

I don't like injustice. I don't like people making up things about other people or stereotyping them and using that as an excuse to abuse them. Those things make me angry. But given the choice between putting my energy into being angry about haters or reveling in the joys of this good life, I will always go for the positive option. The results are always more rewarding.

I don't like violence, but I learned to find some equilibrium with the potential for it. I think people should avoid it if possible. Some situations may require it (e.g., self defense, defense of family) and then it's good to have a clue. Everyone with the physical and mental capacity should probably take some self defense training. Other than that, best not to mess with it.

In general, any time you think your negative emotions might be in charge instead of you, better to work on self control. Practicing letting your positive motions run free is also probably a good thing.

Not sure what this has to do with ASD except maybe for the tendency to hyperfocus and ruminate. Ruminating on the wrong things could take you to dark places where you really don't want to be.



MudoMan
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03 Jun 2015, 9:20 pm

Adamantium wrote:
When I was young I was very, very depressed. Almost didn't make it past 12-13.

But since then, I get down sometimes, but life is good. I don't give a damn about popular people or other people's success. I am more interested in the things and people I like.

Some things make me angry and when I get angry it tends to flare up, but then dies away quickly--like a matchhead.

I don't like injustice. I don't like people making up things about other people or stereotyping them and using that as an excuse to abuse them. Those things make me angry. But given the choice between putting my energy into being angry about haters or reveling in the joys of this good life, I will always go for the positive option. The results are always more rewarding.

I don't like violence, but I learned to find some equilibrium with the potential for it. I think people should avoid it if possible. Some situations may require it (e.g., self defense, defense of family) and then it's good to have a clue. Everyone with the physical and mental capacity should probably take some self defense training. Other than that, best not to mess with it.

In general, any time you think your negative emotions might be in charge instead of you, better to work on self control. Practicing letting your positive motions run free is also probably a good thing.

Not sure what this has to do with ASD except maybe for the tendency to hyperfocus and ruminate. Ruminating on the wrong things could take you to dark places where you really don't want to be.


What is has to do with ASD or aspergers is that many of us tend to be social outcasts or have extreme difficulties in life and possibly have been made fun of a lot and feel tortured. Also the tendency to not relate to anyone might give us the sense that no one is real, or you are not a part of anyone else so therefore life does not matter. Because some of the bad people in the world have been labeled aspergers so I am wondering if it actually IS possible that ASD/aspergers might intensify the lack to care or concern for others as well as possible hate or rage.

I do not believe every ASD is like this but is it possible some of it has to do with it? I am honestly asking.



justanothersara
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03 Jun 2015, 9:50 pm

I've heard/read a lot about people with ASD having anger problems.

I know that when I'm mad I basically black out and I've never laid a hand on anyone but I apparently smile/smirk & say the most concise, targeted, hateful sh*t (that I never remember later). I've had my nose broken for this. Haha. But, I get so angry I don't remember exactly what I say and I can feel it, like I might literally explode.

As an example, I once had it out with a girl I worked with that I knew used to be a meth addict but at the time had recovered and become a stuck up wannabe barbie b*tch who was incredibly rude to other girls, thinking she was the hottest thing out. In other words, she was a huge bully. Because she used to do meth, even though she'd had her skin resurfaced & had lots of work done she was aging faster than she would have otherwise. She started a confrontation with me while I was at a disadvantage (I was totally undressed, she was fully dressed, before our shift at work)... she even had another girl who "had her back" standing behind her with arms crossed as she tried to confront me about whatever drama. I snapped and said a bunch of really heinous stuff about how she surely didn't act her age which I could only assume was nearly 40 with all her terrible plastic surgery, looking like an old shoe with her leathery tanning bed skin. I don't even remember exactly what all I said, I just knew her appearance meant a lot to her so I really went in on that, but the girl who had been standing behind her got really wide-eyed & backed out of the room very slowly. The girl I flipped out on ended up bawling, sobbing that she was only 24. She quit that night; for a really long time nobody saw her.

That's just one example. I tend to do it the most when I am confronted, or when I witness someone bullying others. I was listening to a podcast about Aspergers & the girl they were interviewing said she felt like she could rip out peoples jugulars with her teeth when she was mad... I would say that's an apt description of how I get. It's almost like I get a high.



MLG4Ever
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03 Jun 2015, 10:30 pm

If it is verbal, I would just Cuss at them if I am very upset at what they said
If Physical, I'd Fight them back right away
"apparently James Holmes the theater massacre guy claims he had aspergers in his writings"
This is the 100th time I've seen people like me murder people just because they were lonely or they did not get any help or something else
Man we need to speak up and stop this nonsense or do something about it



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03 Jun 2015, 11:14 pm

I'm not very hateful...of course I've felt anger over being bullied and such as a kid, but rather than really having any urges to actually do anything violent to anyone I did end up feeling suicidal by the age of 15 and attempted suicide. I imagine if I was attacked hypothetically I'd defend myself and not be to worried about making sure not to kill said attacker, but don't think I could really initiate violence.

I have broken things in anger and hit walls hard enough to put holes in them...granted just dry wall walls, though I've certainly hit walls I didn't damage at all that turned out to be much harder than my hand.


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Last edited by Sweetleaf on 03 Jun 2015, 11:19 pm, edited 1 time in total.

asdfor3
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03 Jun 2015, 11:19 pm

People will blame anything and anyone for the actions they do or don't do but they will never blame themselves. Just because they say I did this because of this doesn't mean its so, they are simply looking for a scape goat for their actions.
Personal thoughts, I myself being the way I am ASD I find it very hard to break rules and regulations. This doesn't keep me from playing out scenarios in my head, but I don't act out on them, if I did I would be caught and punished.



Adamantium
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04 Jun 2015, 8:04 am

Sweetleaf wrote:
I have broken things in anger and hit walls hard enough to put holes in them...granted just dry wall walls, though I've certainly hit walls I didn't damage at all that turned out to be much harder than my hand.


I know the feeling. Ouch!

I have also put holes or dents in a couple of walls. This has been right in that flaring match moment of rage. Too much feeling, had to lash out. This is very rare. I am about to be 50 and I can think of three times in my life. Is this atypical for homo sapiens? I doubt it.



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04 Jun 2015, 12:21 pm

When I was in my teens, I had a lot of violent thoughts. I wished I could just beat someone up whenever they pissed me off. I also would talk about shooting and killing myself and using my dad's insulin to kill myself and they will be sorry. My parents just made sure to never have a gun and that my grandfather's was locked up at his house and my dad kept his insulin at his parents. They didn't want to take chances and have me become a school shooter. I often wonder why the hell did Adam's parents have guns around, there were a lot of warning signs and they ignored them. I wouldn't be surprised if they got sued from victims parents. I don't think I would have actually kill anyone at school but my parents didn't want to take the chances so they took precaution. I remember my therapist telling me lot of people didn't have violent thoughts and it's not normal and he said it was an AS thing but I had never ever read online or in books that violent thoughts was a symptom of AS or read about them having violent thoughts.

I think violent thoughts are different than being violent and I don't like violent people and kids. I don't even care why they are violent, I care that they are violent.

I have an uncle who punches holes in walls but just as long as he only does it in his own home I don't care but just don't rent to him or you will have lot of holes to be patching up. My mom told me he was a horrible renter because when he moved out of the house my parents rented him, he left damage in the home and they had to patch the holes. He might have AS because he is short tempered, has anxiety, gets angry easily and he is asocial. My grandfather has always treated him like he is slow so at age 45 he was not allowed to use a chainsaw. But I don't think he has ever hurt anyone and he has never done a violent crime. He has been to our house when I was a kid and has never left damage and he has never hit us or broken anything. My dad told me he will patch his own holes when he punches a hole in his wall. So at least he does have control. He just knows where to do it at. I wouldn't consider him to be violent.


I am sure it's possible that an aspie can get so much anger from years of being misunderstood and not being able to fit in and years of being bullied, they finally snap and do a violent crime.


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redrobin62
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04 Jun 2015, 12:42 pm

I don't like being angry or hateful just like I don't like feeling jealousy and egotistical. As a Jain I've been working hard to eliminate those negative emotions. As an aspie, though, it's been fairly difficult. Still, it almost seems as if being Jainism can counteract some of my stronger negative emotions so I gladly practice it.



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04 Jun 2015, 1:46 pm

I was not raised in a violent household and was not a very violent kid. After spending several years in several different group home's, however, I started getting a lot more nasty. I was very misantrophic and said that the human race is nothing but a bunch of parasites, and one time after being at a crowded event I said I had to get in the shower to wash the human parasites off my body, which the staff found very disturbing. I started swearing a lot and my outbursts became a lot more frequent and severe. The staff blamed this on my mother and my older brother because I would say they wouldn't let the staff treat me the way they did if they were there. My mother started feeling guilty about spending time with me or doing anything fun because of what the staff told her. I found that awful because there was at least one other resident who talked forever with his own mother on the phone every day and went out with her several times a week. They thought I was a danger to myself and others and then one night just before Christmas they took me to the hospital and left me there alone.

Even after I was diagnosed with Asperger's I was a real mess. I once told my father I hated him and I called my own mother the b word which is completely out of character for me. :( When I was in the hospital a staff was looking at me drawing my cartoons and said he couldn't understand why an angry, hostile person like me was even capable of drawing cute, friendly characters. I had started making other drawings filled with hate and rage, but I didn't show these to anyone.

I was very frightened about what my future might be like. I had a constant feeling of impending doom. I imagined myself dead or in jail or homeless. I would remember being told by other people when I was younger that I had talent and skill and a bright future ahead of me. HA! Instead I was a failure and only death could release me from this never-ending nightmare. :|



MudoMan
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04 Jun 2015, 9:51 pm

Wow. I read all of the posts of everyone so far.

I feel like the anger is some kind of pressure in my head or some thing that has to come out or some energy. I feel so epressed too and slow a lot and feel like the aggressive energy is some problem in my mind. I remember people saying a lack of seritonin or something. I have never taken medications and do not plan to either.

I used to hate humanity and the world too and every day I wake up I hate and also hate myself.

When the columbine massacre happened I felt weird because I understood why they would want to do it. I grew up in a Christian home so my Christian faith brought me to calm down over years of being so hateful. I have hope because of my faith in God.
but I feel that if I had different parents I would end up being a criminal or homeless as the person above me mentioned, or in jail. I have also been afraid I was going to get arrested one day, like paranoid because of how people viewed me. I could very well have maybe killed poeple out of serious anger, but I would never be one to kill innocent people. I did have a feeling I WILL attack with my fists the next ahole who insults me at school.

I listened to a lot of hardcore punk and death metal and the brutality of the music calms me down and I feel really good listening to the fast fast music.

But yes if I could snap I would end up with the most brutal atomic bomb insults and behavior. Like overkill. I figure if they want to harm me and beat me, I will defeat them with a total annihilation. So I would say horrible stuff but that never had to happen a lot. I usually just ignored everyone.

Never keeping friends and never having many girlfriends was tough too. I am a lot calmer now and less angry. but I train in martial arts which really helps my body and mind be at peace and let out aggression when I train.

I think some ASD people do have a physical mental defect with intense anger. I would not discount that part of why some people become serial killers or mass killers is because of this disorder. The only thing is not everyone is a freaking sociopath and most of us know right from wrong and feel remorse and guilt and some empathy. So when you have serious feelings you know its wrong and want to find out about yourself and get help. I am glad my mom explored what might be wrong with me and found out about ASD and told me about it.



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05 Jun 2015, 12:23 am

I definitely have anger problems, and when I was younger I was quite explosive. Nowadays, I tend to beat myself up more than anything. It doesn't take much to piss me off, and there are a lot of things that do. I truly wish I had a way of channeling my anger that wouldn't be harmful to myself or others.



MudoMan
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06 Jun 2015, 10:45 pm

mr_bigmouth_502 wrote:
I definitely have anger problems, and when I was younger I was quite explosive. Nowadays, I tend to beat myself up more than anything. It doesn't take much to piss me off, and there are a lot of things that do. I truly wish I had a way of channeling my anger that wouldn't be harmful to myself or others.


Listen to grindcore music or death metal. LOL.

But seriously, study martial arts an learn how to work out! It will help you.