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Rudin
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14 Sep 2015, 9:07 pm

1:

I wouldn't exactly call myself an as*hole. However I'm as blunt as a spoon and I suppose some people find that alienating. If someone touches my stuff or does something that annoys me, why should I not tell them off? Otherwise I'm never going to get what I want and people will continue to do it.

2:

Strange and quirky is who I am. I wouldn't want to change that, it makes me unique. I would rather act normally than have to change my personality around others.

3:

I don't give a bucket of warm piss about how people are feeling, how there day is, NO! It's just irrelevant, stupid things that I honestly don't want to know.

I would like to have intelligent conversations with people but most of the people I know don't really care about the things I like.

4:

That is extremely complicated for me. I cannot simply just ask that.


5:

Yes, yes, yes! I have not met the right people and I have a feeling if I met like-minded people my age I wouldn't like them though.

6:

Sort of. I don't like many people, it is hard for me to like someone.


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Cockroach96
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16 Sep 2015, 5:45 am

Top 6 reasons you don't have friends:
1. You're an aspie.
2. You're an aspie.
3. You're an aspie.
4. You're an aspie.
5. You're an aspie.
6. You're an aspie.


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traven
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16 Sep 2015, 7:19 am

But I do, although I tend to forget, the farmer and his son on the other mountain, I help them out, they help me out and we can talk easily an hour without putting hierarchies in place. But it's activity related we don't mingle in private life.
I heared them being called "sauvages", because they don't keep up much of a socialising lifestyle.



KatlynKay
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16 Sep 2015, 9:56 pm

Cockroach96 wrote:
Top 6 reasons you don't have friends:
1. You're an aspie.
2. You're an aspie.
3. You're an aspie.
4. You're an aspie.
5. You're an aspie.
6. You're an aspie.


Plenty of Aspies have friends and a social life. If YOU don't, the issue may well be YOU not the fact that you're on zee spectrum!



Fnord
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17 Sep 2015, 6:04 am

7. You participate in those stupid counting threads!



TheNameless
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18 Sep 2015, 6:41 am

Ben_Is_My_Only_God wrote:
I have absolutely no conception of what the word "Friend" is actually supposed to mean. I understand acquaintances and I understand people who are useful to me for various reasons but "Friends?" No, I don't want any because I don't even know what purpose they are supposed to serve.


This is essentially how I feel.

I do not crave friendship or socialisation in the way those in my family and even some of my children do. More recently, my children have begun to ask why I don't have friends and comment that it's odd that I don't want them. I don't really know how to explain it in a way they will understand. I just say I don't like people which probably isn't the best response but is fairly accurate.



LogicOrNot
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19 Sep 2015, 5:00 pm

This post has been inspiring to me. I don't really want friends, unless they are genuine friends who I can somehow connect with in a natural and honest way. I have two of those, and they live in a different place now. But, living constantly around people whose lives seem to be largely centered around having many friends who are also highly connected to others, I do sometimes get discouraged. My family was this way growing up; I have often found myself surrounded by such people at work. The difference in our respective sets of values becomes apparent when we get together for extended periods of time (say, longer than for dinner). That is all good and well; to each his/her own. Still, it is somehow good to hear from others with an orientation similar to my own.



AnonymousAnonymous
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23 Sep 2015, 1:27 pm

My mom does not allow me to have friends.

My sister is a b***h and she ended her only friendship a few days ago.

My mom forced me and an old friend to go our separate ways when I was 18 because she thought he was gay. To this day, my mom has never apologized about it.

My sister and my mom both get paranoid when I say that I will bring someone from a class over to our home.

My sister has a bad case of both ageism and ableism.


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nick007
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24 Sep 2015, 1:06 am

I keep to myself alot.
I'm shy & quiet.
I say the wrong things or say them the wrong way.
I look unfriendly or uninterested.
I have few interests & don't readily talk about em.
It takes me a while to open up to people offline.


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ShadowProphet
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29 Aug 2017, 1:20 pm

You know, we really do have a lot in common. I wish I could have met you.



shortfatbalduglyman
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29 Aug 2017, 3:54 pm

[quote="darkphantomx1"]1. You come off as unfriendly and you're an as*hole to others.

Yes others (rightly or wrongly) told me I had numerous flaws. Such as "you don't care about anyone except yourself!". No one thus far told me I was "unfriendly" per se. But maybe they thought it. And I was not totally friendly at all times


2. You come off as strange and odd to others.

Yes but I also feel like I am strange and odd to myself

And what is so bad, inherently, about being "strange and odd"?

It is just bad because it is inconvenient to deal with differences


3. You hardly talk to anyone.

Yes but when I talked to someone, they often told me off or otherwise socially rejected me


4. You never initiate to be friends.

Too many traumatic social rejections

When I tried to "initiate to be friends" someone told me off. For example when I was 14 I made the mistake of asking a classmate what time basketball practice ended and she snapped "none of your business!" At me

And now I am 34 and still remember it

While numerous precious lil "people" had the nerve to ask me "are you a boy or a girl" and I did not tell them off

Although maybe I was wrong as usual. Maybe I should have told them off


5. You simply haven't met the right people yet.

Could be

But I am 34 so that sounds hard to imagine




6. You don't want any friends.

It's not that I do not want friends

It's that fear of social rejection grossly overpowers greed for friends

Social rejection appears, to me, to feel a lot more intense, for a longer time, than having friends

And when I had friends, they sometimes dumped me when they , rightly or wrongly, told me I did or said something wrong

When I thought what I did was not wrong

Or at least was not large enough to justify their response



HistoryGal
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31 Aug 2017, 8:34 am

Where I'm at, people tend to prefer friends whom are well connected and financially successful.

I'm neither of those so I exist on the outskirts of the social scene.



shortfatbalduglyman
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31 Aug 2017, 10:10 am

HistoryGal wrote:
Where I'm at, people tend to prefer friends whom are well connected and financially successful.

I'm neither of those so I exist on the outskirts of the social scene.

_______________________________

Yes some people are like that sometimes

Not everyone is so materialistic all the time

In their defense, however, when someone more financially successful socially interacted with me, it was sometimes awkward because they paid for everyone

And sometimes they acted like, or I felt like, as a result, they had a moral right to treat me as inferior to them

The same with being well connected

When they knew I only had one, a few, or zero friends, it was like they had the :cry: monopoly :oops:

:evil:

:D

Sometimes it is natural or just more convenient to associate someone that is similar to oneself

Difference is not inherently wrong or bad 8)

Difference often takes a lot of energy to interact with

:heart:

NTs and homophobes like to associate with other NTs and homophobes

The world contains a lot more NT than AS

And a lot more cisgenders than LGBT



Sweetleaf
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31 Aug 2017, 11:47 am

3. You hardly talk to anyone.

Quote:
Being too shy is never a good thing for making friends. You are a lone wolf and prefer to sit in the corner doing your own thing rather then interacting with others. Remember that it's far easier to make friends if you're outgoing and social.


Or people assume that is what you prefer. For me its always been hard to talk to people but its not that I don't want to, its just difficult for me. If people talk to me first then that certainly helps, but if people don't know you want to be talked to it doesn't do much good.

I try to look more open to being talked to like with body language but yeah not sure how well I actually maintain that, or might gravitate towards a situation where it is likely someone might talk to me. But I still have not been able to just be able to approach people I don't really know and talk to them. Lol with the approach I do use I could come off even weirder than a quiet person in the corner, because I am a quiet person in the open. But I find that sometimes more outgoing people will talk to you if you're just there, so I have certainly used that to my advantage. Lol maybe I should ask them how they are able to do that?


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Kiprobalhato
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31 Aug 2017, 11:49 am

ShadowProphet wrote:
You know, we really do have a lot in common. I wish I could have met you.


how about quit bumping his rubbish threads.


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StampySquiddyFan
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31 Aug 2017, 12:09 pm

I'm guilty of all of these except maybe 1 and 6. I have some friends, though, because I met other people who fit this list like me :lol: !


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