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otakugenx
Butterfly
Butterfly

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Joined: 17 Jun 2016
Gender: Female
Posts: 9
Location: Lincoln Nebraska

24 Jan 2017, 10:19 am

JohnCNM wrote:
1. take a time out,
2. analyse what happened and learn lessons,
3. make sure you apply those lessons next time (I use nudges, either tech or paper)

For instance I have found socialising much easier, more successful and less tiring since I started reminding myself every day not to analyse social interactions, either (i) whilst they are happening, or (ii) afterwards. No analysing! Just sort of let them be...

all the best
John

This is something I need to do. I am obsessive about it.


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Diagnosed ASD, ADHD (99th Percentile), MDD Recurring severe, Anxiety Disorders, Severe Expressive Language Disorder.

Your neurodiverse (Aspie) score: 159 of 200
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horseguy2u
Tufted Titmouse
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Joined: 31 Jan 2017
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Posts: 40
Location: Pennsylvania USA

07 Feb 2017, 7:38 am

JohnCNM wrote:
... For instance I have found socialising much easier, more successful and less tiring since I started reminding myself every day not to analyse social interactions, either (i) whilst they are happening, or (ii) afterwards. No analysing! Just sort of let them be...

all the best
John


While I agree with this in practice, I can also remember when I was young how important my analytical skills were in crafting compensations for my "social deficits". It would be useful to write a manual for those arriving on the wrong planet with chapters for when they are 8 to 12 years old, 13 to 18, etc. The early chapters might have advice on observing the native behaviors and how to efficiently mimic them so as to not waste ones energy. Later chapters would have advice on how, once compensations are formed, refined and effective, to not "analyze social interactions", as John recommends, and begin to enjoy the normal persona/facade you've built. The last chapter might be about identifying new arrivals and coaching them in how simple the natives really are, even though they do very odd things like kill one another and destroy their planet. :wink:


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IstominFan
Veteran
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Joined: 25 Nov 2016
Age: 59
Gender: Female
Posts: 11,114
Location: Santa Maria, CA.

07 Feb 2017, 11:42 pm

Bea,

I, too feel I have wasted much of my life. I am working hard to make up for it now.