What is the most hurtful thing anyone has ever said to you..

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Some years ago when I was having a meltdown and general emotional collapse and instead of helping me my wife was making fun of me - even in the middle of the emotional collapse I had enough awareness to ask her a couple of times to quit ridiculing me.
It ended with her getting up, standing in front of me, and literally waving her finger under my nose while yelling, "I'll use ridicule on you whenever I want to! I'll keep using ridicule! And you'll just learn to live with it!"
It will probably not astonish you to learn that law enforcement wound up involved and the marriage did not last.

There's so many that I can't remember any one of them clearly. I mean, I would like to think I'm easily offended but when someone comes out of nowhere and tells me to kill myself and my family because of my ethnicity (I'm white but it's complicated) then I am not offended. When someone says to shut up I freak out. I don't understand :L

"a useless eater."

"You will never get anywhere in life"

" You need psychiatric help "" - After driving in Spain and father using the back of his hand to wipe the windscreen putting grease marks all over the drivers window thus narrowing his vision on top of the fact he is blind in one eye and the other isn't so great so by handing him a clean cloth to wipe the drivers window, thinking of the safety of every one in the vehicle seems to warrant a comment of psychiatric assessment for myself!

"You will never make it on your own" (despite being at boarding school from the age of 11 and have been on my own my entire life - (Thanks dad for some of the enlightening comments that will never leave my being!)

A teacher at school calling me gormless and then that becoming my nickname from that point on wards.

Not including many many other times other people have used, manipulated, deceived, beaten and put me down.

"you're just like a little GIRL!"

k*e
A lot of people used to say that to me in school days

I've been experiencing "burnout" for several months. It mostly began December of 2015. I was living in my vehicle in the Bay Area and needed time alone so I was going to go camp at some federal lands in the desert southwest for the winter. The night before I was getting ready to leave for the campsite the next day. I was spending the night in my car at Yuma AZ's walmart. I had just purchased many camping supplies.

My ex (daughter's mom) calls me and tells me I need to get out there right now because she was kicking our daughter out of the house. I was startled. She said she'd help me get back to Pennsylvania so she could live with me. Then she texts me not to come out, that it was settled. I'm in Spidey mode. No way. Nobody even threatens to kick my daughter out. Since her mom failed to give me the money I needed to get out there I returned all my camping gear to Walmart so I had could get as close to PA as possible. I got as far as to SE Missouri where I have family.

My ex and my daughter were happening to come out to Missouri (where I was) for a few days. I was able to see here a few times while they were down.

Here's where the hurtful part comes in... I asked my daughter to please spend some quality alone time with me, because I missed her and wanted to make sure everything was ok. She said, "We didn't come here to see you, Dad".

That crushed me. That was the beginning of my autistic burnout in which I am just now getting over (I think).

^^^^people can be so disappointing, can't they?

In first grade my special ed teacher told me to "quit acting stupid," so from then on I started pointing the sharp end of my pencil towards her believing one day it would magically float in her direction and stab her.

I had a speech therapist that made me sit on my hands in front of the group because I was fidgeting. It was embarrassing and made me want to stab her.

I wish back when i was in school, that pink Floyd would have released their song about how when the teachers would go home at night their psychopathic wives would thrash them within inches of their lives.

It was all the things they didn't say. The truth they denied me.
But I found out.

RELATED THREAD: (LINK) The Subtle Comments From Others Can be Painful Too!

By the very nature of the Autism spectrum, it's common to dwell-on, harp-on both obvious, and subtle experiences. It's common to overcompensate in handling such situations, as well as struggling to find reasons why "things happen the way they happen."

Personally, I've found it best to reassess strengths in order to get to weaknesses e.g., difficulties in handling social skills.

(LINK): viewtopic.php?t=338676

the cumulative microaggressions, plus the gaslighting over the decades.

There are so many to choose from but one in particular happened when I was 11. My Father was working as a FIFO (fly in, fly out) worker. It was the happiest year of my childhood. he was gone for 6 weeks at a time then home for two weeks R&R. On one R&R break he asked me, sounding quite normal, if I knew why he worked away. I knew the money was good so I said 'the money' and he rounded on me shouting 'NO, It's you. I cannot stand the sight of you!' I think it was the shock of how he exploded. I knew he never wanted me and considered I ruined his life but the way he just spat hate, spite and venom was surprising. Usually he gave me plenty of warning before exploding. This just seemed to come out of nowhere.

^^^^

most recently about having aspergers, "that's not an excuse for your behavior"

the person was my boss. she said, "i have a niece with aspergers, so thats not an excuse for your behavior"
i think she was the most closed minded manager i've ever met in the workplace.

another comment that hit me like a monkey swinging a wrench, "you dont look like you have autism"
this coming from a person who "looked" like they had several disabilities.