Why am I unattractive?

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The timestamp says she started this post on May 14, 2016. whixh is about 4 days ago.

There are to NT men who value the nerdy type of smartness, pretty sure my boyfriend is one of them...he's a bit of a nerd himself. Perhaps most average NT men don't value that....but most of society doesn't seem to value that outside of if it helps them achieve a successful career anyways. There are both ND and NT individuals who don't fit in with the norms/averages there are less of those than ones who do follow the norms but its not particularly an NT vs. ND issue.

^ completely agree! My boyfriend is NT and intelligence is the main thing he is attracted to

I wouldn't be so sure any of them are NT. You are not NT just because you lack an ASD diagnosis. You are NT based on traits, and your guys already show they have some ND traits by being attracted to intelligence and being nerdy.

I'm actually pretty offended you are completely disregarding my opinions and experiences. Telling me im wrong ehen you know nothing. My bf shows no signs of being ND and Im angry you think I wouldnt notice it.

My mother works with a lot of autistic children many of which I have helped get diagnosed. I'm pretty sure I know if someone is an ND. How about ask if he is potentially ND and don't assume.

Anyway I don't think I could go out with an aspie anyway

Cavernio here is the thread with the eye contact articles. I do not know why it's being discussed here rather than on that thread.
http://wrongplanet.net/forums/viewtopic.php?t=318369

I'm sure you know him better than I do, but then you don't appear to know what are ND traits and what are NT traits.



ND traits is not autism in children. You have all the wrong idea about what ND traits are. Also, it's quite obvious that you cannot observe ND traits related to relationships in children, and these traits are not part of DSM criteria either.

Besides, most of my comments were for Sweetleaf, not for you.

Those aren't specifically ND traits, believe it or not NTs aren't all dull carbon copies of each other who are anti-intelligence and value conformity over uniqueness...and some ND people are dull and value conformity over uniqueness. There are plenty of nerdy NTs, being nerdy doesn't make one ND or NT.

Also everyone has Neurological condition traits and/or traits of mental conditions...but a trait or two doesn't make you autistic or any other kind of ND. That said being attracted to intelligence or nerdyness are not part of the criteria, even in this very forum I have seen some guys on the spectrum who value physical attractiveness more than such things. Its an individual preference thing not a neurological thing.

Well can you provide a list of what you perceive as ND and NT traits than? So we can see if you know what they are...I have a pretty good idea as to what the actual criteria and traits are but still curious to see yours.

I also would like to know as your criteria seem strange

Me too, I want a list.

Remember when Fnord started writing Nice Guy as a trademark, I think this is similar.

ND*



*according to rdos

Sure. You can see them in the Aspie Quiz PDF, but I can list them here too: (ND-NT relevance in parenthesis)

ND relationship traits:
Do you find it easier to understand and communicate with odd & unusual people than with ordinary people? (.64)
Do you have an alternative view of what is attractive in the opposite sex? (.55)
Do you like to follow (walk behind) people you are attached to? (.54)
Do you prefer to learn the character of a potential romantic partner through observation rather than conversation? (.54)
Do you feel that you are a very special or unusual person? (.51)
Do you tend to look a lot at people you like and little or not at all at people you dislike? (.50)
Do you have an urge to observe the habits of humans and/or animals? (.49)
Have you experienced stronger than normal attachments to certain people? (.48)
Have people you formed strong attachments to taken advantage of you? (.48)
Do you have, or used to have, imaginary relationships? (.48)
Do you have an urge to learn the routines of people you know? (.47)
Do you have odd hair (for example multiple whorls, standing up when short or other peculiarities)? (.41)
Do you examine the hair of people you like a lot? (.41)
Do you have unusual sexual preferences? (.38)
Do you like to protect people you are attached to even when they didn't ask for it? (.35)
Do you prefer to construct your own set of spiritual beliefs rather than following existing religions / belief-systems? (.33)
Do you tend to develop romantic feelings for people that persistently shows interest for you (.25)
Are you more sexually attracted to strangers than to people you know well? (.24)
If somebody showed possible romantic interest for you, would you ask friends for help in checking out if it is genuine? (.23)

NT relationship traits:
Do you enjoy traditional dating? (-.49)
Do you find yourself at ease in romantic situations? (-.46)
Do you like tongue-kissing? (-.33)
Do you enjoy travel? (-.33)
Are you asexual? (reversed) (.31)
Would you discuss relationship issues with your best friends? (-.31)
Do you take pride in your appearance? (-.25)
If somebody showed romantic interest for you, would you discuss it with your best friends? (-.23)

Also note that these are not traits according to my personal beliefs. All of them have been validated on at least a few 1,000 of people of both neurotypes, and most of them have been validated using 100,000s of answers.

Guess I not ND. man are all those doctors, pycs, and government officials going feel silly, they should gone to the supreme commander of all Nds to diagnose people. All nds are alike, all nts are alike.

rdos that list makes it look like all non-NTs are asexual and don't like to go on traditional dates.

Do all aspies have odd hair? Do all NTs have perfect hair?

This just gets more surreal.

I don't like the idea of meeting up with strangers from a dating site, but I don't mind going on a date with someone I know and talking over coffee. That has helped me work out whether I want to take things further or not with men. That makes me NT does it? Oh well. Please inform my Mother of this. She will laugh and laugh

Hahaha I agree with you here. Some of those criteria would suggest I'm NT. Despite the fact I refuse to sit at the desk my mum bought me because the draws are on the wrong side

Well of course in a list long enough everyone will find some points which will be true for them. I bet I could find something which would be true for me from a list of criteria for psychopaths or serial murderers, but it doesn't mean I am one.