Can't stop feeling empty without a girlfriend

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I think that's a fairly human experience, wanting to connect with another or needing them to feel complete. It's part of the natural order of life and although you may achieve contentment and satisfaction from other areas in life (e.g. work, family, friends) it really is not the same as having a life partner you can share experiences and growth with. However, (and I know it is annoyingly cliche) the right person will come for you at the right time, and whilst waiting can be a pain, it is far better than being in a relationship with the wrong person.

I'm NT and feel the same sometimes. My experiences growing up probably give me AS- similar traits although I am not AS - I am apparently the other end of the empathy scale. What are barriers for even taking that first step? As for giving up your individuality, I think that's a risk all people take, AS or not, because no two humans are the same. However people can be compatible either way.

As an NT introvert I often find myself feeling this "out of worldness" and at times feel left behind as I see ex peers and friends reach certain milestones. However, I know I made a choice and that choice was to pursue my career over relationships. That doesn't mean I can't be in a relationship, but I prefer it would just "happen" rather than seek out company. Plus my personality and experiences make it difficult to relate to NTs in a ltr kind of way

Have you tried dating other men?

^Diversity? Acceptance? In Australia?

Unless you live in one of the major urban metropolitans with a high population density and high level of anonymity, it seems, for me at least, that many middle-aged and older here tend to be overly-conservative and old-fashioned, many of the youth are mind-numbingly stupid and more politically apathetic than they may lead-on, and both may be either racist, homophobic, and xenophobic, or over-aggressive, far-left.

The youth here feel too far left for me, and the right too far right.

I'll admit, there are times though people can be friendly and otherwise laidback, good people. But these happen in isolated bursts, and not the general state of mind I have experienced here.

Any nation that re-elected Turnbull at all is clearly going down the drain.

Australia isn't as bad as I say it is, and I do quite like it here, but for quite a few years now I've thought the current state of this nation is the 'calm before the storm'.

Indie underground scene?

Where? What is this scene like? I'm sure I've seen them before, but how do they usually dress and what do they usually do?

Where in Aus are you? And I note you're 17 so I can understand what you mean by youth these days being dumb - so dumb. I used to work in child protection so believe me, I know how crap Australia can be haha. Indie scene in Brisbane is typically where all our local bands and artists hang. Not sure there's a particular dress style but I guess not pretentious? Just quite casual, girls are more vintage retro.

Yeah. I don't mean to sound bitter, or at least if I do, I don't mean to sound absolutely defeatist, just that this has been my experiences, from a young perspective.

I've lived rurally and in major urban cities enough to see the difference. Cities are more progressive and diverse culturally, the small towns feel prehistoric in diversity and values.

As of right now, near sunshine coast but not exactly.

A lot of young males are the jock/bro type.

Unfortunately I don't really fit in with the 'hipster' crowd here either.

It feels like almost all of the young people here are either jock/bros, hipsters or modern nerds/geeks (anime, sci-fi, etc.) of which I never truly fit into any of all three. People are surely more diverse than this, but if they are I am yet to meet anyone who actually branches a bit more out of these three basic stereotypes.

I honestly can't stand the fashion for youth right now.

Couldn't find any decent pictures of what I'm talking about, but these are the closest thing I could find. Basically, any variation of these:







My personal fashion style seems so rare, I have never actually seen anyone who enjoys dressing the same way I do. Ever.

I'll admit, I can be quite superficial and judge people by how they dress.

This is natural for me.

All I see, everywhere I go, for young men and young women, is people dressing and presenting themselves as the three basic stereotypes I mentioned earlier. Rarely anyone seems to dress 'neutrally'. Everyone's look seems designed to communicate something about them.

I am a mix of a variety of different personality types and find I get along with those that are the same, so I'd prefer to approach other neutral and generic looking people for friendship or relationships.

Living rurally can be tough. I grew up in a horribly redneck country town.
Living near sunny coast doesn't seem much better although sunny coast is inarguably better than goldy.
What hobbies and interests do you have?

Technically my area is classed as rural, but it's a larger coastal city with a population between 100,000-150,000.

But I've been in both - rural and big city.

Anyway, I'll try to keep it short, but it'll more than likely be long. I'm sorry, I'm trying to shorten this as much as possible as it is:

I feel my personality is so mixed that every group I try and fit into feels too 'extreme' for me.

I might be slightly nerdy/geeky in interests, but not as much as everyone else. I am a bit of a bro, but never enough for the other bros. You could say I'm 'hipsterish' because of my interest in philosophy, politics, and poetry. But again, I'm not enough of a hipster to connect with them. I have a laidback, goofy/stoner personality despite never having tried weed myself (but love most stoner comedy movies and generally get along well with other laidback, silly stoners). Again, the rest feel too extreme for me.

My best friend is, funny enough, a stereotypical nerd/geek, but we share so few interests and it's my continued mild interest in gaming and anime that helps us find things to actually do or talk about. Also we relate due to both being Aspies Otherwise we're as different as night and day. Another good friend of mine, she is laidback, goofy, carefree and tomboyish. We have a very similar sense of humor (and both felt like we never really fit in with others because of it). Another pair of mates, are mildly sporty and like console gaming. Laidback. I connected with these guys pretty well.

In high school I was part of a nerd/geek/hipster group, but couldn't connect with them as strongly as I wanted to due to very few shared interests. All they ever spoke about was geek pop culture.

The laidback/stoner crowd were usually the 'fake gangsta' acting types and not my type of people, despite my attempts to get to know them.

All my life stereotypical 'jock' and 'bro' males have approached me for friendship, I must give off the impression that I am one because they're always the ones confident enough to offer me friendship first. It's too common to be coincidence. On a superficial level I get along with them best, as I am more bro than anything else, but it seems anything I have with them never lasts, because again - too many differences.

My two and only ex-girlfriends were almost completely out of all categories listed above and so different they were both the first of their kind when I met them.

If I could just meet people more balanced and mixed like I am, I'd be able to connect with others more easily. Then again, I'm fresh out of high school, where EVERYONE is supposed to be a caricature. Do people become more diverse in uni, or what?

Fºck it, I'll continue to give them all a chance yet again in the future - I'll try to get to know the bros, nerds/geeks, hipsters, and laidback stoners whenever the opportunity arises and see which one/s I fit in with best. Maybe I just haven't been trying hard enough or experienced enough of them. Whatever. Hopefully something different will happen next time around.

Even then, when I reach uni, how the hell do I meet anyone young beyond high school cliques/stereotype groups?

Sorry to hijack your thread OP, but I'm going through the same thing.

At least you've identified what kind of people you actually want to seek out to befriend.

I often have an identity crisis, but even when I admit I have a mixed personality, I'm not sure what to specifically look for.