What would you think?
Sweetleaf
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21 Aug 2016, 12:41 pm
Drawyer wrote:
Sweetleaf wrote:
Does anyone have any sort of insight...do you think he's just trying to be social and reach out to people he's met in life that he hasn't talked to in a while. Or do you think he's having a go at me for getting a relationship? I am just not sure what to think.
It's possible he realized that you could be a perfect partner for him only after he knew you moved on with your current boy friend. I used to be surprised by how jealous I felt after I saw a guy move on unbelievably quick.I wouldn't call it unbelievably quick, and the guy ignored messages I sent for weeks and then decides to contact me after like a year when he sees I'm in a relationship. There was one messge before the one that's the basis for this topic...where he asked 'hows it going, I see you're dating a guy' or something which I never got back to him then this time starts with other inquiries but still brings up my boyfriend. It does seem it could very well be jealousy related, but honestly he had his chance and 'ghosted' me I believe that is what it is called when someone you've been dating just starts ignoring you.
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21 Aug 2016, 4:56 pm
^ You did nothing wrong.
I meant, my acquaintance's moving on was unbelievably quick; he literally met a new girl in a couple of days and posted pictures of him and her on his Face Book. And I was shocked that I felt jealousy after seeing those pictures and how I wanted to ask him how his relationship's going..but I didn't and shouldn't.
So based on my experience I thought it's possible he(your ex) contacted you out of curiosity mixed with jealous.
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nick007
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21 Aug 2016, 8:28 pm
Sounds like he's lonely & trying to make you feel sorry for him. Maybe he really is just lonely & wanting someone to rant to or he could be jelly & trying to have an ego boost from you. Either way it's better that you quit communicating with him due to your hurt feelings.
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21 Aug 2016, 8:41 pm
Drawyer wrote:
I meant, my acquaintance's moving on was unbelievably quick; he literally met a new girl in a couple of days and posted pictures of him and her on his Face Book. And I was shocked that I felt jealousy after seeing those pictures and how I wanted to ask him how his relationship's going..but I didn't and shouldn't.
hah!.. that's not "moving on". who knows, maybe he was lucky and it did turn into an actual relationship later, but, "moving on" that quick probably means his ego was hurt and he wanted to make you jealous
22 Aug 2016, 10:17 am
Sweetleaf wrote:
Alright so this is a bit to do with past stuff not my current relationship which is just fine, but a past relationship(I suppose you might call it). So over a year ago there was a guy I went out with a few times who essentially broke it off with me, we went out a few times and I did like him. But after one time we met up I didn't hear from him for a few days...and even made efforts to arrange to meet up again which he ignored all of.
Anyways the other day he messaged me on facebook, I didn't particularly want to respond as I've certainly moved on and am quite happy with my boyfriend. Well after some friendly chat he told me how girls on okcupid don't seem interested and he is not the type they like....well thing is when a girl(me) was interested in him he stopped talking to her until she moved on and found someone else. Admittedly I didn't really have a response to his sentiments, and didn't really want to say 'well I liked you' as I don't want to give any wrong ideas.
Does anyone have any sort of insight...do you think he's just trying to be social and reach out to people he's met in life that he hasn't talked to in a while. Or do you think he's having a go at me for getting a relationship? I am just not sure what to think.
Anyways the other day he messaged me on facebook, I didn't particularly want to respond as I've certainly moved on and am quite happy with my boyfriend. Well after some friendly chat he told me how girls on okcupid don't seem interested and he is not the type they like....well thing is when a girl(me) was interested in him he stopped talking to her until she moved on and found someone else. Admittedly I didn't really have a response to his sentiments, and didn't really want to say 'well I liked you' as I don't want to give any wrong ideas.
Does anyone have any sort of insight...do you think he's just trying to be social and reach out to people he's met in life that he hasn't talked to in a while. Or do you think he's having a go at me for getting a relationship? I am just not sure what to think.
Oh man ghosting is never fun and it always leaves things weird and unresolved. I had that happen to me with a dude I went on a couple of dates with 2 years ago. It was sh***y but honestly he kind of got his desserts cuz I saw him on OKC last year and he'd aged like 20 years within the one year between lol. He looked awful. The more petty side of me was gleeful. I'm an honest person who would never ghost on someone, so I assumed he had something horrible happen at first when he initially started ignoring my texts. It made my anxiety so bad.
Anyways it sounds like this dude just wants validation because no one else seems to want him. So he's being sh***y yet again, like he was when he ghosted. I can't stand users like that, they only want to talk when they need a shoulder to lean on or a quick ego boost. I'd ignore him personally. I'd actually probably block him to be honest. Like some others have said you could send him a message about what he did wrong, you're happy with your boyfriend who actually respects you, and you don't want to talk to him. Do what feels right for the situation.
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Sweetleaf
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22 Aug 2016, 12:23 pm
Drawyer wrote:
^ You did nothing wrong.
I meant, my acquaintance's moving on was unbelievably quick; he literally met a new girl in a couple of days and posted pictures of him and her on his Face Book. And I was shocked that I felt jealousy after seeing those pictures and how I wanted to ask him how his relationship's going..but I didn't and shouldn't.
So based on my experience I thought it's possible he(your ex) contacted you out of curiosity mixed with jealous.
I meant, my acquaintance's moving on was unbelievably quick; he literally met a new girl in a couple of days and posted pictures of him and her on his Face Book. And I was shocked that I felt jealousy after seeing those pictures and how I wanted to ask him how his relationship's going..but I didn't and shouldn't.
So based on my experience I thought it's possible he(your ex) contacted you out of curiosity mixed with jealous.
It is kind of seeming like it's possible, and IDK suppose I'd be more understanding of it if I had just jumped into things with someone else really quick, but yeah I did give it quite a while to hear back from him before I figured it was best to move on. Maybe regrets not having advanced things further with me, but nothing can be done about it now.
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22 Aug 2016, 12:39 pm
I think when he's that unclear with you (texting and then ignoring you, then starting up again) that is a red flag. If he's supposed to be interested in you and ignores you, that means he's going to continue doing that.
Also him trying to make you feel sorry for him with lousy reasons, e.g. "Nobody else is interested in me, hey, I'll pick you!". That is a lousy reason. His responses haven't had much thought put into them at all. He should be trying to impress you.
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Sweetleaf
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22 Aug 2016, 12:53 pm
smudge wrote:
I think when he's that unclear with you (texting and then ignoring you, then starting up again) that is a red flag. If he's supposed to be interested in you and ignores you, that means he's going to continue doing that.
Also him trying to make you feel sorry for him with lousy reasons, e.g. "Nobody else is interested in me, hey, I'll pick you!". That is a lousy reason. His responses haven't had much thought put into them at all. He should be trying to impress you.
Also him trying to make you feel sorry for him with lousy reasons, e.g. "Nobody else is interested in me, hey, I'll pick you!". That is a lousy reason. His responses haven't had much thought put into them at all. He should be trying to impress you.
I think it would be a bit egotistic if he thinks there is any chance I am still interested...don't even know why I bothered responding, guess I hoped maybe I'd get some kind of apology or explanation for the sudden dropped communication or a 'good luck to you and sorry I was rude in breaking it off with you'. Trying to impress wouldn't really be any better though since either way it indicates he's not really respecting I'm in a relationship I have no intention of screwing up or ending.
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22 Aug 2016, 1:34 pm
Sweetleaf wrote:
smudge wrote:
I think when he's that unclear with you (texting and then ignoring you, then starting up again) that is a red flag. If he's supposed to be interested in you and ignores you, that means he's going to continue doing that.
Also him trying to make you feel sorry for him with lousy reasons, e.g. "Nobody else is interested in me, hey, I'll pick you!". That is a lousy reason. His responses haven't had much thought put into them at all. He should be trying to impress you.
Also him trying to make you feel sorry for him with lousy reasons, e.g. "Nobody else is interested in me, hey, I'll pick you!". That is a lousy reason. His responses haven't had much thought put into them at all. He should be trying to impress you.
I think it would be a bit egotistic if he thinks there is any chance I am still interested...don't even know why I bothered responding, guess I hoped maybe I'd get some kind of apology or explanation for the sudden dropped communication or a 'good luck to you and sorry I was rude in breaking it off with you'.
I understand your reasoning behind that. I guess it doesn't sound like he's about to apologise.
Sweetleaf wrote:
Trying to impress wouldn't really be any better though since either way it indicates he's not really respecting I'm in a relationship I have no intention of screwing up or ending.
Ah, I forgot that. That is true.
I just wanted to say btw, with an old post, I remember this was a while ago but all the same, I really am sorry for snapping at you and for not reading your post properly. I can tell you really think things through and you come out with some really wise responses to topics. I should've given you more credit.
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22 Aug 2016, 4:18 pm
Sweetleaf wrote:
smudge wrote:
I think when he's that unclear with you (texting and then ignoring you, then starting up again) that is a red flag. If he's supposed to be interested in you and ignores you, that means he's going to continue doing that.
Also him trying to make you feel sorry for him with lousy reasons, e.g. "Nobody else is interested in me, hey, I'll pick you!". That is a lousy reason. His responses haven't had much thought put into them at all. He should be trying to impress you.
I think it would be a bit egotistic if he thinks there is any chance I am still interested...don't even know why I bothered responding, guess I hoped maybe I'd get some kind of apology or explanation for the sudden dropped communication or a 'good luck to you and sorry I was rude in breaking it off with you'. Trying to impress wouldn't really be any better though since either way it indicates he's not really respecting I'm in a relationship I have no intention of screwing up or ending.Also him trying to make you feel sorry for him with lousy reasons, e.g. "Nobody else is interested in me, hey, I'll pick you!". That is a lousy reason. His responses haven't had much thought put into them at all. He should be trying to impress you.
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