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QuillAlba
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20 Aug 2016, 4:13 pm

I first fell in love aged 18, while I was in Canada for 4 months.

We tried to keep it alive when I returned to Scotland, but we couldn't.
It's still got a little pain to it even after all these years and other , much longer relationships.
You will love again, and you will be dumped too, or you may do the dumping. That pain you feel now is very real, let it fill your brain, write, paint or make videos. Just find a way to let it out, you'll be glad you experienced the pain of a broken heart even though it hurts like a bastard.

It's not nothing, it's something and it's always better to feel something than nothing.

Hang in there dude.



DoesMeanChangingTheBulb
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21 Aug 2016, 1:58 pm

It is something I've considered, yeah. Worst I've done yet is symbolically run a bread knife across my wrist though, just to relieve the tension. My parents have both recommended the medication, so it all depends on what the doctors tell me.

slenkar wrote:
Sorry to hear that,

Btw I wouldn't go on drugs if I were you, they affect your sleeping patterns and are habit forming,unless you were thinking of self harm



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21 Aug 2016, 2:08 pm

My thanks to everyone who's replied. Wish there were something I could do to repay you all.



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21 Aug 2016, 2:28 pm

BeaArthur wrote:
I know Slenkar advised you to avoid the meds, but I am asking you to keep an open mind. They do a lot of good for some people, myself included.


I don't rule it out. All depends on what happens at the appointment, whenever it arrives.



DoesMeanChangingTheBulb
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21 Aug 2016, 2:31 pm

QuillAlba wrote:
I first fell in love aged 18, while I was in Canada for 4 months.

We tried to keep it alive when I returned to Scotland, but we couldn't.
It's still got a little pain to it even after all these years and other , much longer relationships.
You will love again, and you will be dumped too, or you may do the dumping. That pain you feel now is very real, let it fill your brain, write, paint or make videos. Just find a way to let it out, you'll be glad you experienced the pain of a broken heart even though it hurts like a bastard.

It's not nothing, it's something and it's always better to feel something than nothing.

Hang in there dude.


I'm very skeptical of the idea I'll ever find someone else, but I appreciate the support and advice.



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21 Aug 2016, 3:00 pm

don't forget you're 18. even if you're the world's hugest nerd, even if your life is completely dreadful right now, there's no way to know what you'll be like and what your life will be like in 5 or 10 years, and you'll still be young. and it sounds like you've been sincerely loved by someone, even if it didn't work out. so it's not even a matter of being lovable, it's a matter of finding the right person and managing to make it work. channel your heartbreak into something creative and constructive. make it add something to your life and your character. it will eventually lead you to another relationship, with better realistic chances


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21 Aug 2016, 5:35 pm

anagram wrote:
don't forget you're 18. even if you're the world's hugest nerd, even if your life is completely dreadful right now, there's no way to know what you'll be like and what your life will be like in 5 or 10 years, and you'll still be young. and it sounds like you've been sincerely loved by someone, even if it didn't work out. so it's not even a matter of being lovable, it's a matter of finding the right person and managing to make it work. channel your heartbreak into something creative and constructive. make it add something to your life and your character. it will eventually lead you to another relationship, with better realistic chances


I suppose, yeah. At the minute it's very hard to believe though. I certainly don't feel as though I could love someone in quite the same way.



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21 Aug 2016, 5:41 pm

DoesMeanChangingTheBulb wrote:
I suppose, yeah. At the minute it's very hard to believe though. I certainly don't feel as though I could love someone in quite the same way.

and you probably won't. but that's not a bad thing. like others have said, what you're feeling is real and it means something, it's not just random emotions. but it's not the entire universe either, and that's what "time will heal". the feeling won't go away, it's part of you and your life and your future relationships now. but the tunnel vision will go away


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21 Aug 2016, 5:48 pm

anagram wrote:
DoesMeanChangingTheBulb wrote:
I suppose, yeah. At the minute it's very hard to believe though. I certainly don't feel as though I could love someone in quite the same way.

and you probably won't. but that's not a bad thing. like others have said, what you're feeling is real and it means something, it's not just random emotions. but it's not the entire universe either, and that's what "time will heal". the feeling won't go away, it's part of you and your life and your future relationships now. but the tunnel vision will go away


I hope so. I feel really alone without feeling like there's someone who understands me and I can relax and be myself around, and it saddens me thinking how she can't have seen it that way too like I thought she did. It's difficult for me to convince myself I'll ever be able to move on from that feeling, but I suppose older and more experienced people can't be saying I will for nothing.