Do you want a partner?

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There’s nothing I’ve wanted more since I was about fourteen, when I had my first crush. Of course, it was way, way too early for me to be allowed to have a partner back then, so I waited and waited and have been waiting ever since. I’ll only know I’m no longer too young when I’m sure I’m far too old, which I arguably already am for my purposes.

my "partner" is in a flower shop.i cut off all eye-contact with neurotypical women & girls my age,even the ones that are chubby,based on how severely awkward i appear to them,like i would've back in high school

Last edited by JaredGTALover on 16 Nov 2017, 5:23 pm, edited 1 time in total.

Yes indeed.

i'm looking for mine...in a flower shop

Last edited by JaredGTALover on 16 Nov 2017, 8:05 pm, edited 1 time in total.

I definitely do, at this point anyway. But it would have to be someone who's as independent and driven as me and will understand my need for space. They can't need to be together *all* the time.

Sometimes I think I do, but I think what I actually want is a very close friend. I don't have any interest in most things people would call romance, although I do like snuggling. I consider myself to be a generally nonromantic, entirely asexual.

I'd like one, but my thoughts about what that means have changed quite a bit lately. And I'm not entirely sure I can reciprocate enough to do that. Maybe I just haven't met the right person yet.

Yes, I want a partner. I have a lopsided set of abilities, and do much better if I trade what I do well for what I don't. That's a win-win. My social instinct for wanting to connect with others is strong, just quite frustrated.
I have less desire for a romantic partner than a business partner, because the odds of being understood and accepted are so low, and my standards for social behaviour are based on logic. I was curious about sex when I was younger, so I was open to relationships, but they were all based more on not contradicting someone's illusions about me than sharing my heart.
Ideally, a husband or wife will be both a romantic and a business partner as needed.

Yes I can relate very much so my friend. I haven't had a girlfriend for about 20 years now and I'm quite happy with that arrangement. I have had previous girlfriends in the past but it was not a situation that ever really agreed with me and simply conflicted with my desire to be alone all the time.

I have also heard the term "a-sexual" when applied to Autistics like us and I don't think it's fair for NTs to label us so but perhaps it is true to some degree. I only find females attractive and sex is something I desire but not in the traditional way. Without getting too graphic I prefer to relieve those urges with more benign methods.

These are times when public acceptance of asexuality and other non-reproductive behaviour is maximized by excess population. Japan has very low rates of both marriage and birth, with many young people preferring artificial partners, and building robots for elder care.

A robot! Maybe that's the answer. I've seen that robot on ... uh ... I guess it's this screen because I don't have a TV. Anyway, they've got as far as inventing a credible receptionist, meaning she remains seated. Also she's a genius. She could teach me chess, violin, piano, and maybe writing? Egad! She could teach me manners! Let's make her look like my mother, who's been gone these twenty years.

Oh, think of the possibilities! All you young'uns, you can practice for your future, decide on your preferences, try all kinds of personalities for all kinds of relationships, learn about money, try out careers and even fine arts and martial arts.

And for elders like me - I could go anywhere! Last night, for example, when I fell on the sidewalk, my robot would have picked me up. That is a huge improvement, especially in the shower. A robot could be a Service Dog, erm, Service Robot - same functions but acceptable in restaurants etc. And she could figure out the tip.

She could do at least half the housework, I'm sure of it. Look how repetitive it is. Can she drag a broom back and forth? Oh, how elementary of me! The more advanced model will incorporate broom/vacuum functions and tools. While she recites Whitman.

"The more people I meet, the more I like my dog."
- Bumpersticker

People with ASD are not Asocial, well at least not ALL ASD people. i think its more fair to say that most autistics are introverted but even introverts are social some of the time, socializing is part of being human and anyone would go nuts by complete isolation (i think its fair to say we autistics would last longer on a desert island than any extrovert)

that being said it depends on the person, i personally know people all over the spectrum of all ages, some i know just would rather hang out with 1 person at a time and would rather not join into a group, i know some people who love groups of friends, and i know some who are very romantically starved and really just want a partner. and some who are fine just on their own,

personally i go through about 1 month a year where i would like to try to date but it never works out. right now at this moment im in a bit of a 'alone time' funk where only those in my immediate comfort zone are tolerable to socialize with for short periods of time. to me romance is still very confusing and i dont know what romantic love is suppose to feel like yet. same with sexual feelings, also dating is a LOT OF WORK and i just dont have the mental energy to deal with it right now.

so to sum it up. do i want a partner? ehhhh.... not at the moment, i did a few months ago for a few days, but the feeling faded pretty fast.

Definitely do not want a partner. I love being single. I won't even share my bed with my teddy bears - they sleep on the floor.

Well, I do have a partner, but I often wish that I didn't. Not because there's anything wrong with him, it just makes everything really complicated. Having to take another person into consideration in every detail of my life, and never being able to hold my routine because he's there interrupting all the time. I love him, but having him in my life stresses me out.
Now that we've moved apart things are better, but it still causes a lot of anxiety because he can't accept that I want to know when he comes over and how long he's going to stay. He just shows up unnoticed and leaves again whenever he feels like it. It's messing me up.

When this relationship ends (not planning on it, but statistically it will) I don't think I'll be looking for a new one.

I've had two long term relationships that ended in disaster, so enough is enough.

If I see anyone in future, it will be in small doses - for their benefit, and for mine.