Your experience with mindfulness

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You will always have questions, even if you don't consciously have questions.

^That 'present moment' as you described it, is the root of Eckhart Tolle's teachings.

http://www.msn.com/en-us/lifestyle/pare ... cid=HPCDHP

I'm an experiment with my spending using mindfulness. I'm going into my second week of mindful spending. It seems to be working so far.

I thought I'd revive this thread since it's still an important topic. I've been trying to have more experiences of mindfully listening to music. I find it difficult because music stirs up lots of thoughts and feelings for me.

I am always affected by the past but after the time I put into understanding the angles and holes and framing the path I've walked, don't feel actively threatened by the distance and size of the waves - against the peaks.

My latest little book Unclouded by Longing -
Meditations on Autism and being present in an overwhelming world, is all about my experiences of living Mindfully with Autism.

I am also a member of the community of interbeing in London. The community of interbeing was founded by Thich Nhat Hanh.

As well as having high functioning autism I have complex post traumatic stress disorder. I practice to stay well.

Dead thread!

I had a psychologist try to explain mindfulness to me using a strawberry as an example. She first directed me to really look at the strawberry. I hate looking at strawberries because they look like they are covered in blackheads which I find gross. She then wanted me to hold the strawberry and really feel it. Like I want to run my fingers over something that resembles a bad skin condition. Next I had to smell the strawberry. Well that's a laugh because I always sniff food. It took my Husband years to reach acceptance of this particular quirk of mine. Then I had to put it in my mouth and not just taste it but experience the texture as well. Do people really eat things without tasting and experiencing the texture? Genuine question. I cannot imagine eating something without experiencing those things. I'm very sensitive to textures. Even if I like a taste, if the texture is bad I cannot eat it. I left vowing never to return. I want mindlessness. I want to not be constantly aware of every freaking sight, sound, smell, taste and texture. I want to not notice all the little things that others don't. I want to walk into a room and not notice if a picture is hanging at a slight angle of maybe 2mm because I have noticed that other people don't see these things and I cannot not see it and cannot relax until the picture is absolutely level. I want to not notice the tags in clothing, the feeling of the socks on my feet, the constant hum of fluorescent lights and the hundreds of other things that constantly assail me. I don't need to seek more, I need less. I'm glad it works for some but I cannot understand how it can work for me.

I was very serious about meditation in my early and mid twenties, but I noticed that my group had ceased engaging with the world during a very critical period. I left, minus some funds, and tried to use my special talents to make more of a difference, but never met the right partners. I became wary of the consciousness mechanics, because there were so many phonies, and most people seemed to do OK without meditation.
However, my creativity and peace of mind both got worn away, and I'd meditate during the worst times to survive. Now, I think that the stress of modern life, exacerbated as it is for us but also generally, makes meditation as wise as taking time to do the dishes. There's just a build-up of stimulus that has to be rinsed away. I resolved my dilemma over which of the "best" meditations to choose by just experimenting and quickly finding one that worked for me.
Now, I'm still very wary of meditation distracting me from noticing dangerous situations, but trying to find some balance. It does seem to increase the chances of choosing the right fork in a new road, but I wonder if I have the energy left to go down another one.