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techstepgenr8tion
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23 Oct 2016, 12:15 pm

My views on this have shifted over time quite a bit - both on my own goals and 'what it all means'.

I had a lot of goals when I was younger - like being a top-level guitarist in a successful band, being a chemical engineer or pharmacist, or being a world class dnb producer for example where in some cases I may have done pretty decently in my efforts to cultivate what I'd need to get things done but I found out that there were walls at certain points I couldn't move past. From that perspective my life has been constantly reshaped and reconditioned by finding out what my limitations were in certain areas.

I have to leave soon so I can't drag this post out for too long.

To try and condense things a bit - I've found my calling in the last few years toward working more in a split position between IT and finance/accounting. Also, as a primary interest and driver, I feel like my life is really pulling me toward understanding magic and the occult inside and out - ie. understanding its possibilities, chipping away all the things that its not, and doing a lot of explorations of various religious and mystical paradigms as well as magical systems and what their common factors are that achieve one kind of result or another within the person using them.

Other than that I'm still doing a lot with martial arts - I'd like to keep that up indefinitely as part of my life just that I realize a wife, kids, the right kind of job, etc. can rearrange things really fast and you never really know just how long you have with a participatory hobby or sport on a fixed time structure.

I might be able to say a bit more - ultimately though I don't think there's a meaning that's particularly accessible to us, if there is we're all swept up in its current anyway so the best we can do is find ways to do what we enjoy - educating and entertaining ourselves as best we can as we move along.


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“Love takes off the masks that we fear we cannot live without and know we cannot live within. I use the word "love" here not merely in the personal sense but as a state of being, or a state of grace - not in the infantile American sense of being made happy but in the tough and universal sense of quest and daring and growth.” - James Baldwin


mended
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23 Oct 2016, 12:36 pm

My purpose is to pass on my genes. Having produced some children it is now necessary that I continue to nurture them into people that others will want to procreate with thus sending my genes still further into the future. So I'm just another animal.


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shlaifu
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23 Oct 2016, 2:55 pm

I agree that there's no purpose outside of the framework of arbitrary goals we set ourselves.
There used to be a god we could serve, but then we killed him, and now we have to make up our own rules and purpose.

I'm about to embark on an adventure, work-wise, in a third-world country for several months, and depending on how it goes, potentially several years. Mind you, I'm autistic, and the idea of a densely populated tropical country with unreliable electricity, water supply and health services- not to mention the total disregard of traffic rules- scares the living s**t out of me. I'm prone to depression and previous long-term stints in foreign countries have always broken me, taking years to recover (though never fully).
I'm very torn about it, and in contrary to what friends and family say about it, I don't actually think it is a great thing to do. Neither were previous adventures great things to do.
But I definitely believe it will be a great thing to have done.
as were previous adventures.

I talked to a friend about it, he did a similar thing a few years back. And he agreed, that that was a good way to express it and added: "some things are measured that way".
to which I answered: "I think it's life that's measured that way."


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