I'm rebellious and I hate it

Post Reply New Topic

Well I don't really know how to start but here we go. Today I got in trouble in school for not putting my phone away after I was trying to calm down because I was obsessing over not having my glasses. Now the school is threatening to put me in a prison school over a phone I wouldn't give up. Wtf. What do I even do.

School is hell for me because I just don't care about the work deep down inside, I only care about whatever is on my mind that day and can't stop thinking about it. Work is nearly impossible because I can't focus due to me just not caring about school and I get angry when told to do any work without an immediate reward.

I guess you would call this rebellious I don't really know. I just want to live a normal life but the inner me doesn't want and wants to resist being told what to do. (Think the evil Kermit meme) When I try to go along I can't help but have the feeling that I'm living a false life. I think I'm insane. Please help I just want a normal life. So please help anything I do in school is heavily watched because of my history of being placed at special schools in the past and I somehow managed to make it back to public after doing well in summer school.



I guess you could say I'm on the wrong planet. Haha (fml)



(I posted this in the general autism discussion but I have copy pasted it to here)

Funny you say this. I just took my two year old out of preschool for similar reasons. He's not autistic but many of the things you're saying are similar. My son is unusually large and also unusually bright. He was often bored and was not automatically doing what the other kids were doing. The teachers were trying to physically force him to "fall in line" but he was so large that they couldn't and this is how it came to my attention. I took him out.

Okay, so, are you talking about like a "scared straight" school? If you're on the autism spectrum I can't think of a worse place for you to be. That tells me that some pretty dumb people are trying to teach you stuff. Sometimes you have to pull yourself up and admit that the people in authority over you are not capable of understanding you. It's up to you to make things work for yourself.

You're probably not caring about some things because they're not interesting. If I were you, I would try to structure the boring things around more interesting things so that your day isn't too filled with boredom. Even if you have to make up a little interesting task to do on a break as a reward, that would help.

I suggest you put in some kind structured routine for yourself in general. I think the rebellion is an attempt to gain control of your life, which is natural. I would just be careful how you put in structure or control for yourself since people seem so interested in controlling things FOR you.

I would try to accept on a personal level that you are different, that this is not bad, and that some people will never be capable of understanding that. You need to find a way to be true to yourself while still flying under their radar. These will be important survival skills for you so that you can find a career, a spouse, build a household, etc. These same types of people will always be around. It's important to find ways to quietly work around them now. People here on WP are great at helping, especially in detailed situations.