It feels hopeless

Post Reply New Topic

I've never tried one before. The only time that I've heard of one was from a tv show.

but they do exist. they are a real thing.

It seems like even if guys do show interest they lose it fast. It's happened my whole life. The only ones who seem interested seem to just be lonely and don't actually like me. I feel like I can't connect enough with guys to be able to form any relationship. I feel like I get misinterpreted a lot. I've never even cuddled with anyone. It's like there's something in me that's missing in me that makes other women attractive to guys. I don't think I come off as desperate or anything like that. I don't know what to do about it. I wish my friends and family could just give me some brutally honest feed back.

You just described most of the guys here.

Are you seeing a therapist or psychologist about this?

No, but I thought about it. It seems like most of the ones I've seen before don't usually tell you hones feed back. It seems like they sugarcoat a lot of things and that can be misleading for me.

Try to set guidelines with them I guess. But by all means you should look into it. It can be tremendous help.

It's really sad. You're a beautiful girl OP. Why can't guys in your area see that?

^Thanks. I just got reminded of it recently because I met someone that I might like and after we met I haven't heard back. I know it's not a big deal since I don't know them very well, but just seems like a pattern with a lot of guys.

Maybe I could try that.

If you like him, tell him.

Men are more direct than women.

I don't think he's interested though because he hasn't been messaging me much since we met. I wouldn't want to pester him. Also, if I told him that I might like him it might make me seem creepy since he's not showing much interest now.

Maybe he's interested in you but h thinks you're not interested in him because you don't message him enough. Maybe he wants to tell you he likes you but he's afraid he'll seem creepy. Maybe he's worried he'll be pestering you. 

Cost benefit analysis. If you ask him out the worst thing that can happen is he says no. The best thing that can happen is you both begin a wonderful relationship. The best case scenario is better than the worst case scenario is bad.

I know you're nervous. It's ok to b nervous so long as it doesn't stop you from doing what needs to be done. Next time you see him, brace yourself, take ten deep breaths and tell him you like him.

I mean, I sent him a message telling him it was nice to meet him a few days ago so I already did show some interest. He replied back agreeing, probably to be polite, because he didn't reply to the next message. If I sent him more messages it would make me seem desperate. I don't want to keep pursuing someone if they don't show any interest back. That would just give them power over me and make me seem creepy.

I forgot to mention that I met him on a dating site so I probably won't see him irl.

Send him more messages. You have nothing to lose. The worst thing he can do is continue not replying. What have you lost by sending more messages if he's not going to reply anyway?

Or perhaps you have much to gain. Be very explicit. Tell him you like him. If you want you can even tell him you want to be his girlfriend (optional).

Why is it unlikely you'll meet him because he's on a dating site? I've met lots of people I contacted through dating sites. I've had girlfriends I got into contact with through dating sites.

If I kept sending him messages that would be kind of stalkerish. Also, if you keep pursuing someone who isn't interested it just gives them power. I think I'll just keep trying with other guys, but it seems to be a pattern.

We already met irl, but I meant that it probably wouldn't be very likely if I run into him anywhere.