6 Harsh Truths that will make you a Better Person
goldfish21
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Joined: 17 Feb 2013
Age: 41
Gender: Male
Posts: 22,612
Location: Vancouver, BC, Canada
Well, relationships of virtually any kind, whether professional or romantic, are about what people have to offer one another, to give one another, to do for one another etc in a win-win reciprocal way... and tough s**t if you're not up to par. ie I work, I get paid. I don't work, I don't get paid. Pretty simple stuff.
The article doesn't state that money is all important, however, that it is important in the sense of how our capitalist society is structured & thus it certainly doesn't hurt to have some of it. Even then, it's not so much about money as it is about being able to obtain & retain it.. the process. If you can manage that, you'll have the resources to be a provider or offer things of value (not trinkets, utilitarian value). Money is just a commonly agreed upon societal yardstick with which to measure peoples' ability to provide for themselves and offer these things to others.
I wasn't born with a silver spoon or privilege, either. I was once in debt just over $100K & then bankrupt. I'm now in the black multiple 5 figures and working my way ever wealthier, slowly, bit by bit. I'm fortunate to have the support of family that does help me do this via low cost living arrangements. My point is that not being born into money doesn't mean you can't earn and accumulate any. There are plenty of self made multimillionaires who came from poverty.
The author doesn't say you deserve to be alone.. he's suggesting that if you do what it takes to earn it, you can earn your spot as a more attractive person & not be alone.
Once again, I guess 95% of the population must have much higher than me, as the only thing a girl would have to 'earn' from me is my ability to trust her, rely and depend on her.
Of course niceness doesn't pay the bills but personally I value sustainability over excessive luxury and hedonism.
So a nice guy with a min. wage job is still valued less and considered to have very little to offer than a higher-earner.
But anyway, isn't it 2016?
I thought the dreaded Feminism suggests women are 'strong' and 'independent', so why, why oh why would they need to retain such high standards?
Because she doesn't want a man who depends on her?
Well, what if he has a min. wage job and doesn't depend on her but is independent?
Because reasons?
Being successful shows he's hardworking and ambitious?
Well, again, the woman who needs a high earner must have much higher standards than me because I don't correlate hardwork and ambitiousness with education level and monetary income, I associate it with real-life evidence the person has shown me.
Any spoiled 18 year old can be payed through university by their family and because he's N.T. land a simple cushy PT job, it's the aspies, the people disadvantaged from the get-go, the one's who pay their way through university while juggling English lessons and two PT jobs that are truly the hardworking and ambitious ones that have a story to tell.
Even the severely disabled person who may not have ever had a job or studied but is working very hard to live alone, drive, etc. what most N.T.'s consider 'the baseline', I would consider hardworking if the person was disadvantaged from the get-go.
As you can clearly see here a good majority of the males responding clearly don't give two sh*ts about subscribing themselves to the 'rat race' and just want a NICE woman that they are compatible with, attracted to, trust and love over anything else.
With regards to your herbs and traditional medicines to overcome your disabilities, this is largely dependent on brain chemistry and while it may work for some, a good number of aspie men here probably wouldn't react the same way.
Personally I already take a wide variety of traditional medicines processed into capsule form for improvement in cognition, focus, energy, sleep, mood, etc. along with good diet and exercise, good rest, etc. and yes they help, but it wasn't a cure-all fix-all for me.
Nor has therapy, medication or amatuer bodybuilding made me 'overcome' my Apsergers.
Yes, I am in such a better position physically and mentally a few years ago but I'm still not up to par with the average N.T. even MY age let alone when I'll be an older adult and fall further behind if I don't attempt to catch-up.
Life is a marathon, not a sprint but it's better you at least jog the marathon than walk, otherwise people will just think you were never even trying.
Unlike you, a good majority of the men and women here cannot just pick themselves up by their bootstraps and make life-altering changes within a few years.
Some, if not the vast majority here are already using massive amounts of treatment methods including therapy, medication, and trying to leave their comfort zone all the time through studying at university, working jobs, getting out to social events and trying to meet people and women as much as possible, etc.
Seems we're doomed to fail though because we don't subscribe to the same principles that you and a good bulk of N.T. society, particularly women, do.
What's all that dating advice constantly thrown around?
Just BE URSELZ? Just have CAWKFIDANCE?
Yes, most NT women would likely choose a higher earning male - but not just for the money, also for the qualities of an Alpha that make him a higher earning male.
I never said that I value money/income in a partner. Ever. I don't earn much (below the average income in BC) and the guy I've been dating recently earns far less & that's not even been a consideration for me. I'm autistic, we don't tend to do as NT's do. I don't measure his value or attractiveness by the size of his paycheque.
Aside: As for $$ the reason I have as much of it saved and invested as I do isn't because I earn a lot.. it's because I don't care for BS material things I don't need. I value people over things. My car is pretty well only worth scrap value. My work clothes cost $2-8 at thrift stores. My sporting goods are older than most peoples' cars. I'm not wasteful. And once I hit the reset button via bankruptcy right around the time I figured out how to treat my ASD symptoms, I decided I wasn't going to waste any of my second chances - my financial life included.
There was a time I couldn't just "pick myself up by my bootstraps" as you call it. Suicidally depressed for months on end, crippling anxiety etc - which all seems like a distant past life now. I've had to work incredibly hard to get to the happy balanced place I am now. I wasn't born like this and it wasn't handed to me. I worked hard and earned it. I've also been incredibly transparent about my process & protocol, which btw is more than just consuming some herbs. The single most important and effective part of what I do is the regular 3-5L enemas of filtered water/salt & organic apple cider vinegar to cleanse the large intestine/colon of whatever bacteria/neurotoxin to the enteric nervous system that causes ASD symptoms to greatly amplify. Well, that and the probiotics taken both orally & rectally. Gross science, but, it works.
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No for supporting trump. Because doing so is deplorable.
RetroGamer87
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Joined: 30 Jul 2013
Age: 36
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Location: Adelaide, Australia
It's also the plot of the Ring of Gyges from Plato's Republic. Much like Tolkien's ring, the Ring of Gyges makes the wearer invisible. The character Glaucon suggests that morality is only a social construction, the source of which is the desire to maintain one's reputation for virtue and justice. Hence, if that sanction were removed by wearing the ring, one's moral character would evaporate.
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The days are long, but the years are short
Sweetleaf
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Joined: 6 Jan 2011
Age: 34
Gender: Female
Posts: 34,461
Location: Somewhere in Colorado
Well, relationships of virtually any kind, whether professional or romantic, are about what people have to offer one another, to give one another, to do for one another etc in a win-win reciprocal way... and tough s**t if you're not up to par. ie I work, I get paid. I don't work, I don't get paid. Pretty simple stuff.
The article doesn't state that money is all important, however, that it is important in the sense of how our capitalist society is structured & thus it certainly doesn't hurt to have some of it. Even then, it's not so much about money as it is about being able to obtain & retain it.. the process. If you can manage that, you'll have the resources to be a provider or offer things of value (not trinkets, utilitarian value). Money is just a commonly agreed upon societal yardstick with which to measure peoples' ability to provide for themselves and offer these things to others.
I wasn't born with a silver spoon or privilege, either. I was once in debt just over $100K & then bankrupt. I'm now in the black multiple 5 figures and working my way ever wealthier, slowly, bit by bit. I'm fortunate to have the support of family that does help me do this via low cost living arrangements. My point is that not being born into money doesn't mean you can't earn and accumulate any. There are plenty of self made multimillionaires who came from poverty.
The author doesn't say you deserve to be alone.. he's suggesting that if you do what it takes to earn it, you can earn your spot as a more attractive person & not be alone.
Self made millionaires who come from poverty are the exception not the rule. Also it is kind of hard to accumulate money when you have to spend it all on bills and needs. I myself am on SSI but my boyfriend works and yeah he doesn't end up with money left over to save and accumulate....it all goes to monthly expenses, sometimes he is able to save a bit of back up money. But yeah I don't know anyone who is in a position to accumulate much money, unless they win the lottery or something.
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We won't go back.
goldfish21
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Joined: 17 Feb 2013
Age: 41
Gender: Male
Posts: 22,612
Location: Vancouver, BC, Canada
Depends on location. Chances are there are more 2nd+ generation millionaires in very wealthy neigbhourhoods, but where I live in the suburbs almost all of the millionaires I know are self made. It's not all that uncommon, really. I do think that, in general, opportunities are more universal here in Canada - especially Vancouver - than they are in much of the USA where there is a strong correlation between race and last name as to whether or not you get into good schools, get good jobs, or make a lot of money. Here, a non-English speaking non-white person can arrive broke and make their way to millionaire status just as fast as they can. We have many immigrant self made millionaires+ here.
Yeah, paycheque to paycheque living makes things very tough. I'm no millionaire, but I've managed to accumulate some money the old fashioned way - by living below my means. For a bit over a year I spent virtually nothing and saved everything, then invested it. I haven't saved much money at all over the last year due to living it up a little and then some unforeseen expenses.. but my investments have grown significantly, so I'm still getting ahead.
Most people here are not in a position to save much money, either. Most are paycheque to paycheque - even those earning $100K as their expenses and lifestyle tend to eat up what they earn w/ mortgage payments, cars, vacations, kids to clothe and feed etc it's all gone. But thanks to my autistic-level discipline & focus I've been able to accumulate some money and will continue to despite the fact that I earn less than half of that.
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No for supporting trump. Because doing so is deplorable.
The_Face_of_Boo
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Joined: 16 Jun 2010
Age: 41
Gender: Non-binary
Posts: 32,886
Location: Beirut, Lebanon.
Well, relationships of virtually any kind, whether professional or romantic, are about what people have to offer one another, to give one another, to do for one another etc in a win-win reciprocal way... and tough s**t if you're not up to par. ie I work, I get paid. I don't work, I don't get paid. Pretty simple stuff.
The article doesn't state that money is all important, however, that it is important in the sense of how our capitalist society is structured & thus it certainly doesn't hurt to have some of it. Even then, it's not so much about money as it is about being able to obtain & retain it.. the process. If you can manage that, you'll have the resources to be a provider or offer things of value (not trinkets, utilitarian value). Money is just a commonly agreed upon societal yardstick with which to measure peoples' ability to provide for themselves and offer these things to others.
I wasn't born with a silver spoon or privilege, either. I was once in debt just over $100K & then bankrupt. I'm now in the black multiple 5 figures and working my way ever wealthier, slowly, bit by bit. I'm fortunate to have the support of family that does help me do this via low cost living arrangements. My point is that not being born into money doesn't mean you can't earn and accumulate any. There are plenty of self made multimillionaires who came from poverty.
The author doesn't say you deserve to be alone.. he's suggesting that if you do what it takes to earn it, you can earn your spot as a more attractive person & not be alone.
Self made millionaires who come from poverty are the exception not the rule. Also it is kind of hard to accumulate money when you have to spend it all on bills and needs. I myself am on SSI but my boyfriend works and yeah he doesn't end up with money left over to save and accumulate....it all goes to monthly expenses, sometimes he is able to save a bit of back up money. But yeah I don't know anyone who is in a position to accumulate much money, unless they win the lottery or something.
Two-full-job-working couples can accumulate money.
I agree that the article is about what we do with our lives. It's not all about money though, as the article points out some skills that aren't monetary, like giving a massage or playing an instrument. The article also points out that what we do makes us more interesting to others than who we are, because they can't directly see who we are. I definitely disagree with the part of the article that talks about how kindness doesn't matter if someone can get that elsewhere though. Being a good listener is a valuable skill. I'm not a huge fan of sarcastic humor either but I like the main message: do, create, share ideas, ETC.
auntblabby
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Location: the island of defective toy santas
RetroGamer87
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Joined: 30 Jul 2013
Age: 36
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RetroGamer87
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Joined: 30 Jul 2013
Age: 36
Gender: Male
Posts: 10,970
Location: Adelaide, Australia
Sweetleaf
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Joined: 6 Jan 2011
Age: 34
Gender: Female
Posts: 34,461
Location: Somewhere in Colorado
Well, relationships of virtually any kind, whether professional or romantic, are about what people have to offer one another, to give one another, to do for one another etc in a win-win reciprocal way... and tough s**t if you're not up to par. ie I work, I get paid. I don't work, I don't get paid. Pretty simple stuff.
The article doesn't state that money is all important, however, that it is important in the sense of how our capitalist society is structured & thus it certainly doesn't hurt to have some of it. Even then, it's not so much about money as it is about being able to obtain & retain it.. the process. If you can manage that, you'll have the resources to be a provider or offer things of value (not trinkets, utilitarian value). Money is just a commonly agreed upon societal yardstick with which to measure peoples' ability to provide for themselves and offer these things to others.
I wasn't born with a silver spoon or privilege, either. I was once in debt just over $100K & then bankrupt. I'm now in the black multiple 5 figures and working my way ever wealthier, slowly, bit by bit. I'm fortunate to have the support of family that does help me do this via low cost living arrangements. My point is that not being born into money doesn't mean you can't earn and accumulate any. There are plenty of self made multimillionaires who came from poverty.
The author doesn't say you deserve to be alone.. he's suggesting that if you do what it takes to earn it, you can earn your spot as a more attractive person & not be alone.
Self made millionaires who come from poverty are the exception not the rule. Also it is kind of hard to accumulate money when you have to spend it all on bills and needs. I myself am on SSI but my boyfriend works and yeah he doesn't end up with money left over to save and accumulate....it all goes to monthly expenses, sometimes he is able to save a bit of back up money. But yeah I don't know anyone who is in a position to accumulate much money, unless they win the lottery or something.
Two-full-job-working couples can accumulate money.
Not if they have to spend all that money on bills, basic needs and enough entertainment/recreation not to die of boredom. Perhaps they could accumulate some....but not to the degree past generations could just save cash in their mattress and save up to become 'wealthy'.
That said though I am not in a situation like that I get disability income, but will be looking to start some limited hours of working so very part time. So yeah it will be a long while before a full time job becomes a possibility...I suppose me and my boyfriend would have a little more to pool together if I worked full time to but that is not the case. A lot of peoples pay is insufficient for the cost of living.
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We won't go back.
Typically, millionaires actually save money--they earn more than they spend. And, they learn how to do that an early age, so that one can take advantage of compounded returns. For example, if you had 100,00 saved up by age 30 and it doubled every 10 years. Even if you didn't save any more you would have 200,000 at age 40, 400,000 at age 50, and 800,000 at age 60! More importantly, with such a resources they are less likely to panic and make bad decisions.
auntblabby
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Joined: 12 Feb 2010
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Posts: 113,697
Location: the island of defective toy santas
1]lack of disabling mental addlements, 2]hyper-social intelligence, 3]entrepreneurial intelligence. ordinary people will not have all of those gifts in a neat little package. thus, they likely will always be ordinary.
Screw this 'anyone can be a millionaire' mentality BS.
There are so many factors and variables that influence whether or not you even have a chance.
If it were so easy everyone would do it once they know how to.
Even the vast majority of entrepreneurs will never be majorly successful.
It's not as simple as simply 'saving more than you spend', especially if what you receive each year after taxes, bills and money spent on toiletries and luxuries, are covered is an insignificant amount, say $500 saved per year ($5,000 in ten) but much more complicated than that.
Millionaires make investments, they startup businesses and create assets for themselves that generate further revenue, they build networks and connections with others.
This is all easier said than done. It's possible to know exactly how to do something theoretically and then still struggle to do it.
They say in the music industry it's less so what you know but who you know, when it comes to attaining wealth it is both.
It's hard enough to be successful in office/corporate culture and navigate the business world, being an actual entrepreneur or investor is the most extreme version of this.
Anyway, nah, being a millionaire is easy.
All you really need is some advice from good 'ol Tai Lopez! If he can do it, you can! /s
RetroGamer87
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Joined: 30 Jul 2013
Age: 36
Gender: Male
Posts: 10,970
Location: Adelaide, Australia
It's not practical for me to save because my rent takes up most of my income. I love the place I'm living in but I'll never be a millionaire. Oh well
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The days are long, but the years are short
Great, I've read the Karate Kid article of his before.
Tai Lozpez is a bit of a scam.
His wealthy-mentor friend Mark Cuban's Cyber Dust idea will fail. Because Snapchat can be saved, any other app can be saved in some way.that wants to start.
aZHCgKHAwjQ -youtube video, didn't want to link, to promote him.
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