Going back to school. What should I do differently?

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SocOfAutism
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24 Mar 2017, 9:15 am

Marknis wrote:
My social experience has been really awful this time around. In fact, it's worse than it ever was before. Everyone is just hyper focused on their cellphones and don't want to socialize with anyone they don't know. I am also seeing couples everywhere and it just reminds me of what a failure I am with the opposite sex.


Did you know that the original way the word "autistic" was used was to describe being absorbed with your inner state of being? This was way before autism was a group of people. It's funny, because it looks to me that the world has become so neurotypical in the extreme that it is now autistic in the original sense of the word, not in the way we currently use it.



kraftiekortie
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24 Mar 2017, 10:11 am

Yep.......the word was applied to the thought-patterns of schizoophrenics in the early 20th century--specifically by Dr. Eugen Bleuler, who was one of Freud's mentors.



Marknis
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24 Mar 2017, 2:45 pm

I wish I didn't go back if I knew I was going to be socially shunned once again. Some tell me to keep studying so I can go somewhere better later and get a career but things just feel so slow moving to the point I feel like time will run out before I get anywhere.



Marknis
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26 Mar 2017, 2:23 pm

If I knew I would experimence the same social rejection I went through many times before, I wouldn't have gone back.



SocOfAutism
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27 Mar 2017, 7:59 am

Marknis wrote:
If I knew I would experimence the same social rejection I went through many times before, I wouldn't have gone back.


I just completed a Master's degree in a second subject this past Fall. As in, I had up to a Bachelor's in one thing and a career in that subject, then went back to school at the bachelor level and earned up to a Master's in the new thing. I was going to go on to a Doctorate, but changed my mind.

I've been doing a lot of thinking about all of it. I think the reason for going to school is to get a job. You have to hold onto that. The first time I went to school it was a technical school- the people were way different, the professors weren't even professors they were mostly Master's level instructors and all of them had real life experience. It was such a better experience. I mean, even the people I didn't have anything in common with- I got along with them and they got along with me.

It's not like that in "real" college. I think you have to put your head down and remember your goal- the career at the end. I hate to tell you this, but the reason you are being ostracized is because most of the students in "real" college are a**h*les. It is totally not you.

I mean, unless you and I are the a**h*les and everyone else is great. Maybe that's the truth. But you can't think that way. You seem normal and I think I'm a normal person too. Just remember the end goal.



Marknis
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27 Mar 2017, 9:31 am

SocOfAutism wrote:
Marknis wrote:
If I knew I would experimence the same social rejection I went through many times before, I wouldn't have gone back.


I just completed a Master's degree in a second subject this past Fall. As in, I had up to a Bachelor's in one thing and a career in that subject, then went back to school at the bachelor level and earned up to a Master's in the new thing. I was going to go on to a Doctorate, but changed my mind.

I've been doing a lot of thinking about all of it. I think the reason for going to school is to get a job. You have to hold onto that. The first time I went to school it was a technical school- the people were way different, the professors weren't even professors they were mostly Master's level instructors and all of them had real life experience. It was such a better experience. I mean, even the people I didn't have anything in common with- I got along with them and they got along with me.

It's not like that in "real" college. I think you have to put your head down and remember your goal- the career at the end. I hate to tell you this, but the reason you are being ostracized is because most of the students in "real" college are a**h*les. It is totally not you.

I mean, unless you and I are the a**h*les and everyone else is great. Maybe that's the truth. But you can't think that way. You seem normal and I think I'm a normal person too. Just remember the end goal.


A lot of my pain comes from how both people I knew back in grade school, my parents, and other peers told me college was going to be so much fun and better for me socially than grade school was. They even told me I would find my love partner in college; even those I knew in grade school told me that despite how they hadn't been to college yet. I assume maybe their parents met in college. Instead, I've been dragged through the sewer emotionally. I feel like I have been lied to. I've had to tell the same people I hate them and wish they had shut the f**k up.



AmryAnn
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29 Mar 2017, 7:18 am

Study what interests you the most. That is most likely what you will be best at, and is what will make you happiest. There is opportunity for success in any field. What often makes people stand out from the rest is passion and a novel approach.


Dont give up. Life happens. Things get hard. Just keep working and doing your best.

Dont worry about finishing within a certain time frame. Just work at the pace that is best for you... It took me 6 years to finish my bachelor's degree in biology and during that time I went through a divorce and my mom died...Now I'm in an excellent Master's program and I am on track to go for a PhD.

Dont give up. Follow your interests and dont ever apologize for being weird. :)



Marknis
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29 Mar 2017, 9:49 am

AmryAnn wrote:
Study what interests you the most. That is most likely what you will be best at, and is what will make you happiest. There is opportunity for success in any field. What often makes people stand out from the rest is passion and a novel approach.


Dont give up. Life happens. Things get hard. Just keep working and doing your best.

Dont worry about finishing within a certain time frame. Just work at the pace that is best for you... It took me 6 years to finish my bachelor's degree in biology and during that time I went through a divorce and my mom died...Now I'm in an excellent Master's program and I am on track to go for a PhD.

Dont give up. Follow your interests and dont ever apologize for being weird. :)


I just wish the social scene was better. Even if I get good grades, it's not worth it if I can't find a girlfriend.



Marknis
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31 May 2017, 12:24 pm

I am starting anothet class tonight but I fear it will be another journey that leads to disappointment.



Marknis
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31 May 2017, 10:17 pm

I am dropping the class. I hated it from the get go.



SocOfAutism
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01 Jun 2017, 7:42 am

Marknis wrote:
I am dropping the class. I hated it from the get go.


What class was this?

I was just reading about that Evergreen college stuff. I'm so glad I stopped going myself. I feel for all you guys still pushing on.



shortfatbalduglyman
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28 Jun 2017, 9:02 pm

do more research about what to major in.

go on RateMyProfessor website and look up professors before taking their classes.

join clubs related to your major. join social clubs for your hobbies. if you have no hobbies, pick some up.

time management

stress management

set reasonable goals. achieve them.



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29 Jun 2017, 1:50 am

Marknis wrote:
If I knew I would experimence the same social rejection I went through many times before, I wouldn't have gone back.


How exactly are you being 'socially rejected'?

Give us some real world examples, in good detail.

It may all be in your head, some people perceive no attention as social rejection, e.g. if no one ever talks to them they think society is rejecting them, when they never made the effort to talk and get to know others in the first place.



Muziek
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30 Jun 2017, 5:41 am

Marknis wrote:
I haven't been to college for about two years now but I decided to go back in an attempt to make this year different. It's not the college of my choice but I have financial and work related time constraints. I also signed up late so I had to take what I could get. It's a start, I suppose.

My past experiences with college weren't the best. Some classes I thought I would do good in I failed instead and the social life there wasn't much different than how it was in high school. I guess I watched too many college oriented movies like Animal House, Revenge of the Nerds, and Back to School and thought college was supposed to be like how it was in those movies. I should've known to separate fact from fiction, especially since I was at a community college instead of university.

What can I do differently to make my experience better this time around?


All I can say is make sure you enjoy it fully. Not only the learning and passing the examinations, but the complete experience. Make sure you do not over-estimate, nor under-estimate yourself. This will give you more energy to succeed.

Good luck,
Muziek


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SandraH155
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30 Jun 2017, 2:58 pm

Enjoy learning, college life. Don't exhaust yourself with studies, let the professionals from MOD EDIT - LINK EDITED OUT write your essays for you. Do what you enjoy doing the most.