Going back to school. What should I do differently?
My social experience has been really awful this time around. In fact, it's worse than it ever was before. Everyone is just hyper focused on their cellphones and don't want to socialize with anyone they don't know. I am also seeing couples everywhere and it just reminds me of what a failure I am with the opposite sex.
Did you know that the original way the word "autistic" was used was to describe being absorbed with your inner state of being? This was way before autism was a group of people. It's funny, because it looks to me that the world has become so neurotypical in the extreme that it is now autistic in the original sense of the word, not in the way we currently use it.
I just completed a Master's degree in a second subject this past Fall. As in, I had up to a Bachelor's in one thing and a career in that subject, then went back to school at the bachelor level and earned up to a Master's in the new thing. I was going to go on to a Doctorate, but changed my mind.
I've been doing a lot of thinking about all of it. I think the reason for going to school is to get a job. You have to hold onto that. The first time I went to school it was a technical school- the people were way different, the professors weren't even professors they were mostly Master's level instructors and all of them had real life experience. It was such a better experience. I mean, even the people I didn't have anything in common with- I got along with them and they got along with me.
It's not like that in "real" college. I think you have to put your head down and remember your goal- the career at the end. I hate to tell you this, but the reason you are being ostracized is because most of the students in "real" college are a**h*les. It is totally not you.
I mean, unless you and I are the a**h*les and everyone else is great. Maybe that's the truth. But you can't think that way. You seem normal and I think I'm a normal person too. Just remember the end goal.
I just completed a Master's degree in a second subject this past Fall. As in, I had up to a Bachelor's in one thing and a career in that subject, then went back to school at the bachelor level and earned up to a Master's in the new thing. I was going to go on to a Doctorate, but changed my mind.
I've been doing a lot of thinking about all of it. I think the reason for going to school is to get a job. You have to hold onto that. The first time I went to school it was a technical school- the people were way different, the professors weren't even professors they were mostly Master's level instructors and all of them had real life experience. It was such a better experience. I mean, even the people I didn't have anything in common with- I got along with them and they got along with me.
It's not like that in "real" college. I think you have to put your head down and remember your goal- the career at the end. I hate to tell you this, but the reason you are being ostracized is because most of the students in "real" college are a**h*les. It is totally not you.
I mean, unless you and I are the a**h*les and everyone else is great. Maybe that's the truth. But you can't think that way. You seem normal and I think I'm a normal person too. Just remember the end goal.
A lot of my pain comes from how both people I knew back in grade school, my parents, and other peers told me college was going to be so much fun and better for me socially than grade school was. They even told me I would find my love partner in college; even those I knew in grade school told me that despite how they hadn't been to college yet. I assume maybe their parents met in college. Instead, I've been dragged through the sewer emotionally. I feel like I have been lied to. I've had to tell the same people I hate them and wish they had shut the f**k up.
Study what interests you the most. That is most likely what you will be best at, and is what will make you happiest. There is opportunity for success in any field. What often makes people stand out from the rest is passion and a novel approach.
Dont give up. Life happens. Things get hard. Just keep working and doing your best.
Dont worry about finishing within a certain time frame. Just work at the pace that is best for you... It took me 6 years to finish my bachelor's degree in biology and during that time I went through a divorce and my mom died...Now I'm in an excellent Master's program and I am on track to go for a PhD.
Dont give up. Follow your interests and dont ever apologize for being weird.
Dont give up. Life happens. Things get hard. Just keep working and doing your best.
Dont worry about finishing within a certain time frame. Just work at the pace that is best for you... It took me 6 years to finish my bachelor's degree in biology and during that time I went through a divorce and my mom died...Now I'm in an excellent Master's program and I am on track to go for a PhD.
Dont give up. Follow your interests and dont ever apologize for being weird.
I just wish the social scene was better. Even if I get good grades, it's not worth it if I can't find a girlfriend.
do more research about what to major in.
go on RateMyProfessor website and look up professors before taking their classes.
join clubs related to your major. join social clubs for your hobbies. if you have no hobbies, pick some up.
time management
stress management
set reasonable goals. achieve them.
How exactly are you being 'socially rejected'?
Give us some real world examples, in good detail.
It may all be in your head, some people perceive no attention as social rejection, e.g. if no one ever talks to them they think society is rejecting them, when they never made the effort to talk and get to know others in the first place.
My past experiences with college weren't the best. Some classes I thought I would do good in I failed instead and the social life there wasn't much different than how it was in high school. I guess I watched too many college oriented movies like Animal House, Revenge of the Nerds, and Back to School and thought college was supposed to be like how it was in those movies. I should've known to separate fact from fiction, especially since I was at a community college instead of university.
What can I do differently to make my experience better this time around?
All I can say is make sure you enjoy it fully. Not only the learning and passing the examinations, but the complete experience. Make sure you do not over-estimate, nor under-estimate yourself. This will give you more energy to succeed.
Good luck,
Muziek
_________________
I'm a straight guy, '80s geek, and musician.
As a musical term for sure, "the '80s" imply the late '70s and early '90s. You can think of them as tapers of this golden decade.
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