NT People That Tell You How To Feel

Post Reply New Topic

They also discount what the ASD person thinks and experiences. Some think we are quiet. Still others come to message boards and patronize us.

I told a NT that I didn't feel like doing something because social situations are stressful, so they rolled their eyes at me and said "life's stressful."

Someone told me that I can choose to be happy or sad. I chose happiness because I hate pity. I was once told by my mum that I shouldn't feel the way I did about my birth gender which is different from my profile gender. I didn't listen to her. I dress the way I do, because that's how much I identify as a man.

My autism is the cause my wrong opinion on an autism issue. No empathy etc.

I typically don't like when I explain emotions to people because they are very hard to express for myself; for example I told my father and mother that I don't like the word love because it just means one really likes something or someone, and they got mad about me saying that because apparently I have never felt true love, what ever that is, and my girlfriend had a very similar reaction to what I said. I still use the phrase I love you, but I still feel like it's just a word for emphasis.

Usually I have people attempting to tell me "to feel" rather then "how to feel".

My mom often tells me that males cannot have an anxiety disorder because we are male.

I was diagnosed with Generalized Anxiety Disorder when I was 18 and my mom saying that males are faking anxiety disorders is sexist BS!

Sounds like the feelings police. I hate them. For example, one time my mother told me I was having anxiety about having anxiety when I told her why I was having it. I just find doing things I don't want to do stressful so it gives me anxiety and I hate having to make phone calls that make me have to wait or even having to get stuff I need to keep my kid's healthcare and all that and there she was telling me I was having anxiety about having anxiety.

I also hate the experience police. Telling me what was going on through my head instead when I try to explain like my mom will say I was just in a rush than me having problems with doing more than one thing at once and then forgetting the other task.

Also telling me I get a sick feeling in my stomach and knots when I was trying to explain how stressful something is. No I am not having anything psychical.

Just a reason why I don't like talking about my problems. I have always been discredited for my problems and being told it's normal or being given excuses like 'they're just second graders" to justify their abuse towards me on the playground so it taught me that it's okay for kids to be cruel and they must be avoided and this can't be okay for them to be mean just because they're little and being told the bullying and being singled out I am going through is normal and keep being told I am normal when I would express how different I am and why I can't be normal and be treated like everyone else. Then I have been told in my teens how everyone needs help with school work and how math is hard for everyone and I have been told about my anxiety that it's stressful for everyone.

I try to forget about my birthday, but people always want to pressure me into feeling happy about it.

It's my birthday! I can do what I want! And what I want is to forget it!

I had an "aid" that tried to rearrange my locker because I have executive dysfunction and my mom told her I was disorganized. Fine, I had problems with putting homework papers in between textbook pages or in the wrong folder and forgetting they were there, but she tried to rearrange everything in my locker because she thought it looked ugly. I had it set up so I could just grab the stuff I needed for the next class without having to spend extra seconds looking for the right notebook. It made sense to me. But she had everything set up by color spectrum and type of notebook and everything and I wanted to rip my hair out.

I think I know this feeling, too. It's hard to explain, but I find it really hard to make any formal phone calls, as in when I have to call a place I'm looking for a job from or when I need to get a doctor's appointment. I've gotten better and can easily make the call if I just have to get a routine check from the dentist or need a doctor because of an ordinary cold, but everything else is difficult. I usually call my mother before I make those calls and ask her what I need to say and, well... she does try to tell what I need to say the best she can, but sometimes it's obvious that she's frustrated about why I can't handle such simple things and at times she does tell me that it's "not that hard." My father's even worse; he just says "it's hard for everyone" and doesn't really even try to help out because he can't understand how it can be hard for someone... I suppose that's what the lack of empathy is like? Being unable to understand that people view and experience things differently I mean.

Then there's another thing with my senses (as in my sense of smell, my hearing...) I've always had problem with certain types of fabrics; they just feel horrible, painful against my skin, but this is something most people don't understand. One of the most recent examples is how I used to live as roommates with a relative of mine and I got a gift card to a furniture shop, and we agreed that if we found good curtains for our place I'd pay for them with the card. She found a few she liked, and since they were just curtains I wouldn't really have cared what they looked like, but the fabric was the problem. I couldn't touch any of those curtains without feeling very uncomfortable, so I didn't want to buy them with my money, and that caused a bit of a fight. She thought that it shouldn't matter since I wouldn't really have to touch those curtains, but I didn't want to pay for something I wouldn't be able to use. Looking back, I could've avoided the fight by letting her buy them with my money and then either given them to her or just thrown them away when we no longer lived together, but I think I made the right choice; it's about principle. She has asthma and can't handle scented candles, so while living with her I didn't use any. For the same reason I also cleaned a lot more often than I would've seen necessary, so I found it kind of offending that she wouldn't respect my problems at all.

There's a few exambles from my life, I hope I got the point of this topic right.