Girls do any of you have this problem? (long)

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So do any of you girls have probs with ex gfs trying 2 contact ur bf? Heres some back ground on the girls. Girl A: used to be bfs f***girl. My bf was single when they did but she had a bf. He told me she told him she used to do her uncle willingly. When bf & I first started dating she msged him saying she wanted to meet me & hangout. Then she msged him again when his family died in a wreck & said that she was there 4 him. She I worry bout the most she seems like a sneaky slut. Back when he was on a break from another ex he got with her to piss other girl off. Awhile back he bumped into her when we were at the store with me there & they were talking for 5-10 mins while I was there. It was like I didnt exist & he didnt even introduce me. He didnt tell me it was her until we left the store. Now Girl B sent him a friend request that all I know bout her. She may have good intentions. Girl C was bfs ex fiance. She cheated on them when they were engaged & took all his stuff & sold it. Hes friends with her family still which is ok with me & can't stand her. She msged my friend wanting to know how my bf was doing back when I was pregnant. Also one time I went to the store she worked didnt think she still worked there & she followed me around like a creeper. I guess she was trying 2 get a look at my belly since I was preggo. Now Girl D msged my bf yesterday he dated her like 10yrs ago. She said he popped up in the suggestions for messaging & she wondered how he was doing. That may truly happened & she may have good intentions but I call bs. What girl would msg an ex they havent talked to in 10yrs on Vday. I think she made the suggestion thing up as an excuse 2 talk 2 him. I trust my bf but I dont trust these girls bcuz he tends to date crazies. He thinks they all have good intentions. We have a no talking 2 exes policy in our relationship. One time I told him I passed an ex in the store but I didnt talk to him & my bf got all jealous & said that I prob talked to him which I found ironic since this happened after he saw & talked 2 Girl A at the store with me right there. Opinions girls. He always tells me these girls msg him. I dont normally sneak into his phone but when I do its just to see what these girls say. Then I delete their msgs or requests. I dont reply to them bcuz I dont want to start a fight & plus my bf will prob find out somehow I msged them back if I do.

Since there is only one person you have control over (yourself) I think we should focus on you and what you can do. I don't believe in trusting other people. They will always let you down, and that puts you out of control again. So, back to you. You need to trust yourself. You need to trust that whatever happens in your life or relationship you will be okay. Whether you BF sleeps with someone else, calls girls, lies or is completely faithful and good you need to be there for you. It will make you nuts running around spying on him and those girls. Don't pay any attention to it, get a good hobby, and continue with your life. Don't let petty things consume you. You're smart and a wonderful person. Be confident and don't think twice about this silly stuff.

I totally agree with the post above. Why do you need to trust his ex gfs? You only need to trust him, right? This kind of problem never confuses me. I dated a guy seriously and he even proposed to me. We went to Paris and I found, accidentally as I had to use his phone to email some pictures of myself, pictures and emails showing that he had been been communicating in very ambiguous ways with his ex gf as well as ex wife and had met with them a couple of times with unknown details. I found out this because I am good at investigation (I am a very good researcher that is part of my job ) I questioned him over and over. He denied anything going one but eventually admitted. He then sent a final break up email to his ex gf and showed me the sent email with a very sad face It was even amusing to me though I was still angry. I told him that he did not have to do this and I could still leave him. Then I changed my plane tickets twice and went home much earlier than I planned to. I have blocked him on all phones, emails, and social media since then. That is just the way I am. It is all or nothing.

Throughout this I never held any grudge against his ex gf or ex wife. I figured they were probably as clueless as I was about this guy and were no less victim than I was. In such situations it was the guy that had a problem, not the women. btw I have met with his ex wife but not his ex gf. I know her name and her employment and may still run into her at conferences. Should that happen, I won't have any problem.

I just read a few sentences and this is what I have to say :

I would kick your bf to the curb - it takes two.

This OP has made 2 of the same thread for some reason.

Here's the second one with more replies: viewtopic.php?f=6&t=337258&p=7463385#p7463385

My original comment from the other thread:

I've had the problem before, many of my female friends had the problem before, it's quite a common problem when it comes to relationships. I wouldn't put up with it though, I would literally break up with him if this problem occurred more than once because it's not worth the stress and worry when you could have another guy probably even better and wouldn't dare even think of doing that. These exes should be blocked already. All that stuff people say about staying in friendships with their exes is just nonsense, they're only doing it because they still have feelings but can't admit it or just trying to have some long winded "my life is better than yours" battle over facebook.

He seems insecure and immature. What f*****g serious boyfriend doesn't introduce you to people? That's a mess on his part.

Like if his ex was such a bastard to him then why would he even dare reply, especially if you have that policy? Unless he likes talking to all these girls to prove to himself he's some stallion through his own insecurity but only staying with you because he probs wouldn't get another relationship so you're like his safety girl if cheating/flirting backfires?

Honestly if you're paranoid about him flirting or talking to his exes then I don't think it's worth it anyway - if he's given you reason to worry, which he has multiple times, then I don't think it's worth being in a relationship with him because it's unnecessary stress for you and it's not fair on you at all. Tell him to fix his s**t or you're gone. Put your foot down and don't let someone make a dickhead out of you. There's plenty of nice guys out there, you don't have to stick with a guy who's a dick, even if you have kids with them. Maybe try going to a womens refuge centre to get some proper professional advice.

Also, any girl trying to get back in contact with their ex - ESPECIALLY on Valentines day of all days is super disrespectful to you and sort of a bitchy dig at you - definitely has an ulterior motive and if it was me I wouldn't put up with it, I'd tell him to block/delete and if he refused then you know he still has feelings for them which is even worse and even more reason to get rid of him and find someone better.

I hope you come to some sort of resolution sweetheart, all the best.

P.S. Please make paragraphs, after this----alot of people won't even read a "wall of text", like that, sometimes----you know, Aspie, sensory issues, and stuff.....

Cross post thread locked.