Autism and haircuts
I hate getting haircuts because I hate the pressure to chit chat with someone I am paying to do a job. However, sometimes I force myself to look my coolest and make a tiny bit of conversation so I don't get a crappy haircut. I find they give better haircuts to people they perceive to be more hip. The last couple times I seen the same hairdresser and she knew I was quiet and maybe sensed I was mentally incompetent in some way and gave me stupid haircuts. I want to look beautiful as much as the next woman. But she talked down to me the whole time.
My poor son hates haircuts so much he's only had a few professionally done and would sob silently the whole time. Now his dad takes him though and somehow it's okay.
What have your experiences been?
I won't go to the hairdresser, not unless I mess it up and need it fixing. I cut mine myself for years until I did exactly that, and had to find somewhere that could take me in that same day and fix it. They did a good job and so I went back but it was disastrous.
They don't listen. I told the lady I like my fringe long and thin, kind of wispy. When I left she'd given me a short blunt fringe which made me look permanently surprised. I don't know whose hair she'd given me but it wasn't mine. She'd even brushed forward non-fringe hair into this new fringe and so the rest was very thin. I cried all the way up the road. Between that and having to make small talk, I'd really prefer never to go back.
I have to go because I've been putting it off for so long, my hair is now at butt level. I hate going because I'm claustrophobic. My cut is pretty straight forward so not too much to get wrong. I plan to try to go Thurs to this guy my Ma just raves about. We'll see. I'll let him do all the yapping while I plan my great escape as soon as I can.
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Me grumpy?
I'm happiness challenged.
Your neurodiverse (Aspie) score: 83 of 200
Your neurotypical (non-autistic) score: 153 of 200 You are very likely neurotypical
Darn, I flunked.
Last edited by nurseangela on 21 Feb 2017, 4:54 pm, edited 1 time in total.
I gave up about 3 years ago. To have a stranger stand behind me, touching my scalp (which gives me goose bumps, and not the pleasant kind), handling a pair of scissors while incessantly small talking to me …
I figured it was easier to teach myself the basics of cutting my own hair.
I cut my own (grade 2) and have done for years.
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Diagnosed: Asperger's Syndrome (ICD-10)
Self-Diagnosed: Aphantasia
Your neurodiverse (Aspie) score: 152 of 200
Your neurotypical (non-autistic) score: 46 of 200
Listener of all things noisy, viewer of all things bloody, writer of all things sh*t.
Precisely this.
I have no idea what a haircut would cost now, but imagine it's probably double what I last paid. Whenever that was. If I ever end up at a barber again, I'd hope he was sullen, quiet, and just got it out of the way as quickly as possible.
Hairdressers are typically exactly the kind of people I don't like - shallow, image obsessed and fake. I find it very difficult to deal with them. The conversation is awkward. I don't particularly enjoy speaking to them, and they don't particularly enjoy speaking to me, so it's all very forced.
I went to one a couple of years ago and it was the first hairdresser that I'd made an effort to go back to regularly. First and second times went well, but the second time she didn't cut the hair quite as short as she had done the first time. By the third time, that was exaggerated because it had grown even longer. She cut it, still not enough, and when she asked what I thought I said "can you cut it a bit more?", and she got moody and responded with "That's not a trim. That's practically a restyle! I should be charging you more!".
For more than a year I avoided hairdressers again. But I like my hair short - above shoulder length - and if it gets too long I'm very uncomfortable, so I found a mobile hairdresser thinking that I'll at least feel better in my own home than in a salon. And I've been lucky - my mobile hairdresser is fantastic, comes every six weeks, does a great job and the conversation is comfortable as well.
Precisely this.
I have no idea what a haircut would cost now, but imagine it's probably double what I last paid. Whenever that was. If I ever end up at a barber again, I'd hope he was sullen, quiet, and just got it out of the way as quickly as possible.
Back when I used a barber, I got upset when the price rose above £1.50 Back in the 80s, I used a Greek barber in London who always had dog racing on the TV, there were always a few ancient cronies scattered around on the cheap plastic seats and he used to drop ash on your head from a soggy cigar that never left his mouth. Now, that's a proper barber!
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Diagnosed: Asperger's Syndrome (ICD-10)
Self-Diagnosed: Aphantasia
Your neurodiverse (Aspie) score: 152 of 200
Your neurotypical (non-autistic) score: 46 of 200
Listener of all things noisy, viewer of all things bloody, writer of all things sh*t.
I hate hairdressers with a passion. WAY way way too head sore for anyone to touch my head let alone brush it or cut it. The whole culture that comes with it is so cringe and narcissistic. I have to do it myself, which is fine because I basically just taught myself how to layer hair. It's amazing what you can do with a few mirrors, pair of scissors and a disposable shaver. Hairdressers act like their job is so complex and whatevs but it's not, an idiot could learn that stuff. Probs why a lot of idiots go into it that don't listen to people.
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The term Aspergers is no longer officially used in the UK - it is now regarded as High Functioning Autism.
My hairdresser knows I'm an artist.
So one day, she decided to surprise me ...
Without telling me beforehand,
she turned me away from the mirror so I couldn't see what she was doing.
She then dyed my hair
three different colors at once.
Then she spun me around in the chair and shouted "Ta ... daaaaah!"
My jaw dropped when I looked in the mirror
and saw that I now had blonde, medium brown, and almost black hair
all at once!
I ended up going home,
going to sleep and dreaming about my hair,
waking up in shock at seeing it in the mirror again,
taking a pair of scissors,
and cutting off all the yellow hair myself!
I think she's autistic too. She certainly is eccentric.
And, I like her.
So she is still my hairdresser.
I think she's scared to dye my hair any other color now
besides dark brown.
...
I wish I could do my own hair but I have a pixie cut and just can't. Years ago I would go over my head with clippers. People thought I was a boy. Lol. I never cared.
I hate the frequency with which I have to get it cut too. It's like every 6 weeks. I'm probably going to grow it out because who can stand going to the hairdresser?
All the hairdressers in my area are robbers, not that I ever gave them business to begin with. According to my mum's frequent complaints, 90% of the time one is seen by a really green trainee, too. Used to have waist-length hair kept in a plait all my life, then back in 2015 cut it off with a pair of scissors to about 2 cm. The change in my appearance led people not to even recognise me. ^.^
In any case I just don't consider hairdressers as necessary and instead have been enjoying discovering new hair styles and dyes as it's grown back, while being mindful of safety precautions for my dyes. Occasionally I'll look online for tutorials by those who know their stuff regarding the mysteries of hair.
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On hiatus thanks to someone in real life breaching my privacy here, without my permission! May be back one day. +tips hat+
I also don't like the conversation during the hair cut. The place by my house also offers to wash your hair. I have asked a few other men and they all say they do this and it's relaxing and in some cases good because the chest of an attractive female stylist rubs them. To me it's very uncomfortable. I can wash myself. I guess it's easier to cut the hair if you do so I feel bad. For a few years the only hair cut I have gotten is my sister trimming. I prefer that.
ASPartOfMe
Veteran
Joined: 25 Aug 2013
Age: 66
Gender: Male
Posts: 34,476
Location: Long Island, New York
Some autistics are very touch sensitive to haircuts.
I have been going to the same barbershop for over 5 decades.
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Professionally Identified and joined WP August 26, 2013
DSM 5: Autism Spectrum Disorder, DSM IV: Aspergers Moderate Severity
It is Autism Acceptance Month
“My autism is not a superpower. It also isn’t some kind of god-forsaken, endless fountain of suffering inflicted on my family. It’s just part of who I am as a person”. - Sara Luterman
Agreed, I'd rather go to the Dentist! I haven't been to a hairdresser for around 12 years, even then I only ever had trims. I find them too nosey, loud and false - the worst kind of extroverts. My hair's getting thinner because I always tie it back in a ponytail, but I can't wear it down because it's not in a proper style, so I'm stuck. I do cut it myself though, once every few months.
It's not just the hairdresser, I hate the whole salon environment so maybe, like you, I'd feel better with a mobile stylist.
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