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d_a_l_j
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14 Mar 2017, 9:13 am

Actress Raven Symone, when confirming she was in a same-sex relationship, said : "I don't want to be labelled gay. I would rather be labelled as a human who loves humans. "

Similarly, I don't want to be burdened with the label of autism, because in some areas it represents a closed door. I would rather people think of me as unconventional or maverick. And I should think declaring yourself autistic is similar to coming out as gay. You have to do quite a bit of soul searching before you feel ready to bring it out into the open, because people will react in different ways. But the main thing you want is their understanding.



DADLER
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14 Mar 2017, 9:52 am

I agree. There shouldn't be labels. I think for those around them the most should be made aware of what is going on. But labels suck and people put their judgment glasses on before getting to know the person.



naturalplastic
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14 Mar 2017, 10:35 am

The problem is that here on planet earth there is no escaping labels.

So by declaring that you dont want the label "autistic" you are in effect embracing the default label everyone gives you instead of "autistic" which is "retard".

Saying "dont label me 'autistic' " is in effect saying "DO label me a 'retard'".

So your task now is explain why you prefer the label "retard" over the label "autistic".



iliketrees
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14 Mar 2017, 11:04 am

DADLER wrote:
I agree. There shouldn't be labels. I think for those around them the most should be made aware of what is going on. But labels suck and people put their judgment glasses on before getting to know the person.

Well there goes language. We need labels to communicate. I'm pretty sure we wouldn't exist without it.

I don't tell people just randomly I have autism, but I know I do and I know it's useful to have a term for it.



Benjamin the Donkey
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14 Mar 2017, 11:28 am

I'll tell people the label / diagnosis AFTER I get to know them and they've accepted me for who I am. I'd rather they get to know me first as me, rather than an example of a type.



ASPartOfMe
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14 Mar 2017, 12:09 pm

If people do not want to label themselves that's fine. If the want to that is ok also.


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d_a_l_j
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14 Mar 2017, 12:26 pm

Quote:
Saying "dont label me 'autistic' " is in effect saying "DO label me a 'retard'".

So your task now is explain why you prefer the label "retard" over the label "autistic".


I never said I prefer to be labelled a retard. I hate that word even more tha autism. The "R" word signifies stupidity, and 9 out of 10 people on the spectrum do not consider themselves stupid.



Noca
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14 Mar 2017, 1:44 pm

Labels are very useful for me. Regardless if I have labels or not I am going to be struggling and sick every single day. Seeing as I am dependent on other's, if I am having a bad day, if I am unable to complete a task or whatever limitation, I can't just throw a handful of symptoms at someone and expect them to be understanding or adjust their expectations accordingly because I look young so therefore people assume I must be healthy and I am not a stereotype of a low functioning autustic so therefore people assume I must have no limitations or difficulties at all. This is why labels are important. Labels aren't important only if you aren't struggling and you aren't dependent on anyone.


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idonthaveanickname
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14 Mar 2017, 2:11 pm

d_a_l_j wrote:
Quote:
Saying "dont label me 'autistic' " is in effect saying "DO label me a 'retard'".

So your task now is explain why you prefer the label "retard" over the label "autistic".


I never said I prefer to be labelled a retard. I hate that word even more tha autism. The "R" word signifies stupidity, and 9 out of 10 people on the spectrum do not consider themselves stupid.

You tell 'em, d_a_l_j! I absolutely agree with you. I don't like that R word, either. I find it very offensive. I was about to give the person you replied to a piece of my mind, but you beat me to it. I'm glad you did. I've been called a retard before, and it felt like I got stabbed in the heart. That was my older daughter's father who called me that, by the way. What an a$$hole! Anyway, I tend to judge people just by what they look like on the outside. For instance, if I were to see a young woman (or any woman) wearing short shorts, I would think to myself "She's a slut." Or if I saw someone with a lot of tattoos and piercings, I'd think that they're no good or that they think they're badass. I know it's wrong for me to think this way, but I can't seem to help myself. But once I get to know a person and realize what they're going through, then I'm not as judgmental. In fact, I might get to like them or at least relate to them. Ok, I think that's all I have to say about labeling.



naturalplastic
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14 Mar 2017, 2:26 pm

d_a_l_j wrote:
Quote:
Saying "dont label me 'autistic' " is in effect saying "DO label me a 'retard'".

So your task now is explain why you prefer the label "retard" over the label "autistic".


I never said I prefer to be labelled a retard. I hate that word even more tha autism. The "R" word signifies stupidity, and 9 out of 10 people on the spectrum do not consider themselves stupid.



Exactly my point.

People with autistic behavior get picked on and get called "retard", or "sicko", or "crazy". But especially "retard".

We live in the real world where there is no option of "no labels". The only options are which labels to pick from.

So if you deny us autistics the "autistic" label then "retard" is what you get left with by default.

So denying the label of "autistic" is one and the same thing as promoting the use of "retard" as a label.


So if you hate 'retard' even more than you hate "autistic" then why are you (for all practical purposes) advocating "retard" as a label?



d_a_l_j
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14 Mar 2017, 6:57 pm

Let's get this straight once and for all.

Yes, I am autistic.
No, I don't want to be persecuted, stereotyped or treated with condescension because of it. My particular diagnosis of autism is such that I don't believe it should govern or dictate my life choices or job prospects. Although I'm disabled, I do have abilities.

Likewise, members of the LGBT community don't want to be persecuted because of who they are sexually attracted to.



naturalplastic
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14 Mar 2017, 8:37 pm

d_a_l_j wrote:
Let's get this straight once and for all.

Yes, I am autistic.
No, I don't want to be persecuted, stereotyped or treated with condescension because of it. My particular diagnosis of autism is such that I don't believe it should govern or dictate my life choices or job prospects. Although I'm disabled, I do have abilities.


So what?

If you are autistic your destined for a life of persecution, and condescension, for it, regardless of whether you are labeled it with it or not. Thats because its the condition that causes the problems, not the label.

If you had been born in a previous decade when they didnt dx folks like you under the AS you would still have the autistic spectrum condition you have now. But wouldnt have the label of autism. And your autistic behavior would get you "labeled" as a retard, or wierdo, and you be persecuted, and be unemployed all of the same. You would be "free" of the label, but not free of any of the problems that you associate with the label.



C2V
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14 Mar 2017, 9:00 pm

The autistic label actually helps me.
If I'm not up front about what exactly is going on here, I get other interpretations - that I'm being deliberately rude or disrespectful when I don't talk or look directly at people, that I'm retarded because of the way I talk, that I'm being willfully difficult or uncooperative when I get overloaded and can't do what others can do easily, that I'm being lazy or difficult when I can't work certain jobs, that I actually don't like people if I don't engage socially, that I'm mentally ill for things like stims, etc etc.
When I'm up front about the fact that this is so because I'm autistic, people are actually a lot more understanding. They don't react as if I'm like them, where such behaviour would be deliberate and negative, or weird and dangerous.



DevilKisses
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15 Mar 2017, 12:35 am

I only use labels when I need to change people's assumptions. Since I'm a feminine looking girl who's never dated any girls people assume I'm straight. Most of the time I don't care if people assume I'm straight. When it starts to become an issue I'll say I'm gay, queer or whatever label works the best.

I don't think autism is a useful label. At least not for me. I'd rather be seen as bitchy, stuck up and artsy than autistic. People also see me as socially awkward, lazy, disorganized and geeky. Calling myself autistic won't change those opinions. Autism also pathologizes everything. Like my sculpture skills might be seen as a splinter or savant skill or all the time I spend on the internet could be seen as an aspie obsession. Instead of just a bored 20 something.
I see this shyt with aspie boys all the time. Plenty of young boys love video games and computers. But if an aspie boy does they'll attribute it all to aspergers.


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DADLER
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20 Mar 2017, 1:17 am

All good points.