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Friendship was easier as a child

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TheWalrys435
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19 May 2017, 9:18 am

banana247 wrote:
It saddens me to agree with this wholeheartedly... I was quite popular as a kid in school but now relationships are such a struggle. I'm jealous of my younger self in that respect.

One thing that I think happened with me is that when you're kid, it's "cool" to be the "smart kid", and in my school, everyone liked the teachers, so it was "cool" to be popular among the teachers. I was the smart kid and always got a lot of attention for my projects, papers, grades, etc. Once you start getting into middle school, nerdy is suddenly a big negative and it's cool to be a slacker. Also, people start to rebel against "adults", so being favored by the teachers makes you a pet and a loser.

Also, being a smart kid made me good at video games, video game hacks and cheats, coding websites, building robots and models of things, etc, all "nerdy" things that are really cool to pretty much all kids when you're young. As you grow, most people begin to manage all the basics of these things on their own and they become much more socially oriented, and it simply becomes the bad "nerdy" to be extra good at these things.


Yup, it's always when social life becomes more normalized in adolescence that our real pain begins. Personally, I'm envious of The Big Bang Theory group. Such a great group of cerebral nerds who all accept one another. And most people who look into it agree that Sheldon is an aspie.



DeadOperaStar
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19 May 2017, 10:24 pm

that's been my experience too. i think to add to what you were saying, people become less open to different experiences and different types of people as they age. which includes me as much as anyone else.
i'm most unsettled by the fact that as i become more sophisticated and knowledgeable about being sensitive to others and what they may find insulting or threatening, i myself have become altogether less able to stand being around groups of people or new people, contrary to the popular advice that more social exposure acclimates one to that sort of thing. seems to be the opposite for me.



Summer_Twilight
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20 May 2017, 7:09 am

TheWalrys435 wrote:
banana247 wrote:
It saddens me to agree with this wholeheartedly... I was quite popular as a kid in school but now relationships are such a struggle. I'm jealous of my younger self in that respect.

One thing that I think happened with me is that when you're kid, it's "cool" to be the "smart kid", and in my school, everyone liked the teachers, so it was "cool" to be popular among the teachers. I was the smart kid and always got a lot of attention for my projects, papers, grades, etc. Once you start getting into middle school, nerdy is suddenly a big negative and it's cool to be a slacker. Also, people start to rebel against "adults", so being favored by the teachers makes you a pet and a loser.

Also, being a smart kid made me good at video games, video game hacks and cheats, coding websites, building robots and models of things, etc, all "nerdy" things that are really cool to pretty much all kids when you're young. As you grow, most people begin to manage all the basics of these things on their own and they become much more socially oriented, and it simply becomes the bad "nerdy" to be extra good at these things.


Yup, it's always when social life becomes more normalized in adolescence that our real pain begins. Personally, I'm envious of The Big Bang Theory group. Such a great group of cerebral nerds who all accept one another. And most people who look into it agree that Sheldon is an aspie.


Lol, I don't think Sheldon is the only one. I think Raj and Amy are both on the spectrum as well.

1. Amy has problems understanding other people's personal space and jumps into things. She also can get a little too personal.
2. Raj had trouble communicating with women along with connecting with them and can't seem to find or keep a relationship.

Perhaps Stewart is on the spectrum as well but you notice that they act like a clique and mistreat him. There are lots of people with Asperger's who mistreat others as well.