I'm scared of walking alone outside after 9pm

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I feel the same way.

Agreed, but that does not change the fact that the presence of sexual predators is a fact that is likely nearly as old as mankind.

We know that, and pointing it out to us repeatedly is not useful or helpful. If you have nothing helpful to contribute, how about getting out of this thread since it's in the Women's Discussion?

My apology to the OP: I had not realize I was in this part of the forums.

it's funny that the most basic principle of what we are saying is so often ignored and redirected to precisely what we are not

Also was. Once I could be raped but thanks to God's grace it did not happen( from that time my panic raised), and I often come back home when it's dark. I will advise you the way I did: prefer jet, electro shocker, and self-defense courses.

awesome book: https://www.amazon.com/Gavin-Becker-Gif ... YZE6ZK419Z

The Gift of Fear by Gavin DeBecker

I've been wanting to read that book. I heard a lot of good things about it.

If I'm in a deserted area, I won't go out alone after dark at all. But luckily I live in downtown Montreal where it's crowded, and when I go out at night I'm usually going for coffee with my friend anyway so I'm not alone. The McDonald's is open all night so I know where to go if I'm locked out of my apartment building with no bus money to get to my parents' place, but 1) I can just ring someone's doorbell anyway, and my friends will always let me in and 2) I'm never locked out of my building because I wear my keys on a string. Which I suppose someone could strangle me with, but I'm usually careful.

Yup I don't like walking by myself too late either. Although I don't mind country walks by myself which freaks my Mum out. She hates me doing that.

Bad men are dangerous to other physically weaker men too, the truth is a stranger armless man wouldn't risk his life by confronting (ie. telling them to stop the behavior) a bigger/stronger male or even a gang of males, for the sake of a stranger woman in the street who's not his loved one, ie. neither his wife/gf nor his daughter/sister/friend ...etc, the best he can do is helping the harassment target to get away and call the police later on.

I recall I was walking with two female buddies in a shady neighborhood, and there was a group of 3 gangy-type guys leaning on the side wall started saying stupid things to them, I've just changed position myself to walk on the side where the guys were standing, they stopped talking when they've noticed that I am with them, and we simply ignored them and moved on.

Do you think it would have worked if I lectured to this type of people about how bad their behavior is? "Hey guys, please stop, this is a bad sexist beh-- ***Fists on my face** x_x.

I bet these guys don't even listen to their moms. Be realistic in what you demand.

Last edited by The_Face_of_Boo on 25 Jul 2017, 1:31 am, edited 3 times in total.

what's "jet"?

If I tried that here in the Bible Belt, I'd get laughed at, get called a "p****" or a "fa***t", and then get punched in the face. At best, they would knock me out. At worst, I'd probably get killed. Even the women would probably call me a "mangina" or "nice guy" in the shaming way.

A lot of Bible Belt women also consider a sexist man to be "manly" and doing what God intended. The Bible Belt is a very backwards place for both genders.

I am 5'3 and they were like 6'0 and big; imagine what would have happened to me if I attempted to confront them; and I am no Bruce Lee.

We are also creatures who instinctively seek for survival.

I'm 5'11 but my muscles are underdeveloped despite exercise. I wouldn't have done well either.

And unfortunately that is considered cowardly in a lot of cultures.

I see nothing sexist about walking with someone for protection; the personal safety advice we were always given in college was to go in a group and stay with the group. Sexual harassment and assault are crimes of opportunity; make yourself a hard target and you reduce your likelihood of being a victim.

That said-- It needs to be stressed, INFINITELY, that these are actions committed by selfish, weak, pathetic slimeballs lacking so much in self-control as to be lacking in humanity. There's nothing sexist about safety in numbers...

...but there is EVERYHTING sexist about the idea that a woman out alone, or after a certain hour, or dressed in a certain manner is "asking for it."

I was ALWAYS out alone (if I'd waited to have a group, I never would have gone anywhere or done anything). At all hours of the day and night. In the daytime, I took fewer pains to be aware of my surroundings, tried to make myself small, and was generally on edge because of all the people. And sure enough, if I was going to be harassed, it was going to be in a busy area in broad daylight. At night, I KNEW I was taking a risk. I stayed alert, scanned my surroundings constantly, and moved like I owned the place because I was in my element. Nobody even TRIED to cross me; the few people that approached to do so much as bum a light said "Please" and "Thank you" and got on about their business.

There is much to be said for what is taught in self-defense classes about body language, purposeful movement, and situational awareness.