Page 1 of 1 [ 12 posts ] 

NewTime
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 14 Apr 2015
Posts: 1,938

19 May 2017, 5:00 pm

I've had times when I've approached girls and they seemed afraid of me. Sometimes they would even say that I was scaring them. I don't know why this would be.



slw1990
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 9 Jan 2014
Age: 33
Gender: Female
Posts: 1,406

19 May 2017, 10:16 pm

It's common for people with autism to have a blank expression and that seems to make people uneasy so maybe that's why. I notice people seem uncomfortable around me too. I've even been told that I look scary in some of my pictures and I'm a girl.



Chronos
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 22 Apr 2010
Age: 44
Gender: Female
Posts: 8,698

19 May 2017, 10:42 pm

NewTime wrote:
I've had times when I've approached girls and they seemed afraid of me. Sometimes they would even say that I was scaring them. I don't know why this would be.


Why don't you ask someone who knows you well why this might be. You might be displaying some type of body language or acting in same way that's inconsistent with how most people approach or interact with other people.



Kiprobalhato
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 25 Mar 2014
Age: 27
Gender: Female
Posts: 29,119
Location: מתחת לעננים

20 May 2017, 1:44 am

it usually is body language, yes.

i hesitate to say "afraid", but lots of girls were uneasy around me when i was around 13 to 15...for good reason. i was far too touchy back ten, i wouldn't speak in full sentences and sneaking up behind people (males alike) would make me exited. needless to say, i've grown out of that now...

so i think they were right to be uneasy, and i hope you don't do any of those things. but i don't think that's the case. :wink:


girls are indifferent to me nowadays. oddly enough the two i know who have ever been attracted to me are bisexual.

are you aware of what facial expressions you tend to make when approaching females?


_________________
הייתי צוללת עכשיו למים
הכי, הכי עמוקים
לא לשמוע כלום
לא לדעת כלום
וזה הכל אהובי, זה הכל.


Canary
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 27 Sep 2016
Age: 35
Gender: Female
Posts: 603
Location: Midwest

21 May 2017, 5:38 pm

slw1990 wrote:
It's common for people with autism to have a blank expression and that seems to make people uneasy so maybe that's why. I notice people seem uncomfortable around me too. I've even been told that I look scary in some of my pictures and I'm a girl.


This is something that comes to mind, along with potentially being someone who's physically imposing (very tall, maybe) or approaching women in places where they're more likely to have their guard up (like at night if they're alone).

Something that seems innocuous if you know you have no bad intentions but looks different to a stranger.



Stalk
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 19 Jul 2012
Age: 45
Gender: Male
Posts: 2,129

23 May 2017, 2:41 am

Yes, some girls compares me to Dexter the tv show, because I'm a loner, so they are afraid of me, and don't trust me. But I've learned now, that if that is what they are thinking, I should stop wasting my time trying to please them and move onto someone with more brains and can figure out that I'm not like Dexter the series. I'm searching for someone positive and full of ideas, and always sees the silver lining.



Kiprobalhato
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 25 Mar 2014
Age: 27
Gender: Female
Posts: 29,119
Location: מתחת לעננים

23 May 2017, 3:16 am

^ i admire your realization :mrgreen: it often is refreshing, letting go of the burden of pleasing others.

i being a perceived loner made people wary of em as well, males and females alike.


_________________
הייתי צוללת עכשיו למים
הכי, הכי עמוקים
לא לשמוע כלום
לא לדעת כלום
וזה הכל אהובי, זה הכל.


Sabreclaw
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 23 Dec 2015
Age: 28
Gender: Male
Posts: 1,971

23 May 2017, 4:41 am

I don't know. I haven't spoken to a woman outside the internet in years. In highschool they all thought I was an ugly creep so I expect I'll be seen the same way nowadays. Plus being a loner makes it worse. Apparently having difficulty making friends is considered a sign that you're some kind of psycho murderer.



GiantHockeyFan
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 18 Jun 2012
Age: 41
Gender: Male
Posts: 3,293

23 May 2017, 8:10 am

I would say that is likely why I got so few second dates. I doesn't help being 6'6" on top of being an awkward loner. I once had two women in an elevator tell me I looked like a serial killer completely out of the blue for example.

Looking back, I was dating a woman for a few months and something didn't seem quite right even though we were an excellent match. I now realize she almost never wanted to be alone with me: the one time she went to pick me up she conveniently felt 'sick' and had her friend drive us, when I visited her apartment alone she took the conversation outdoors almost immediately and when she finally visited my place alone she sat almost next to the door. I still can't figure out what I did to make her feel so uncomfortable!!



Jacoby
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 10 Dec 2007
Age: 32
Gender: Male
Posts: 14,284
Location: Permanently banned by power tripping mods lol this forum is trash

23 May 2017, 8:25 am

I don't think so but then again I don't know, I'm not comfortable around other people 99% of the time so I wouldn't be surprised if they weren't either.



This_Amoeba
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 20 Dec 2016
Gender: Female
Posts: 575
Location: Plum Island, NY

23 May 2017, 8:47 am

Yes. Something is off putting about me. I don't blame them :D



JaredGTALover
Toucan
Toucan

Joined: 10 Jan 2017
Gender: Male
Posts: 296
Location: Bronx,NY,USA

23 May 2017, 4:03 pm

if any chubby worman or girl in school or the neighborhood knew who i was by appearance as well as by name,they'd issue a C.O.S:Call him an Alien On Sight,if that ever happened,it would be Mortal Kombat every day based on how avoidant of them i would be :ninja: :ninja: :ninja: :ninja: :ninja: :ninja: