This doesn't make sense to me

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slw1990
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26 May 2017, 12:05 am

I'm not really creeped out by it. I just feel like maybe when he did that he had an idea about me that wasn't real. He doesn't know what I'm like. I don't feel like I should get gifts from someone who doesn't even know if they like me.

The_Face_of_Boo
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26 May 2017, 10:03 am

I dunno slw, from what you describe; things really don't make sense.

It seems you lack the "sex appeal" factor - I strongly believe in that.

Ever tried other demographies? Other than Whites?

slw1990
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26 May 2017, 6:44 pm

The_Face_of_Boo wrote:

I dunno slw, from what you describe; things really don't make sense.

It seems you lack the "sex appeal" factor - I strongly believe in that.

Ever tried other demographies? Other than Whites?

Yes, I think more than half the dates I've been on were a different race and cultural background. I live in a college town and most of the guys I meet are students.

hurtloam
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27 May 2017, 4:30 am

It can be conversational ability rather than "sex appeal". If you're meeting guys that want a reationship rather than a hookup thdn it doesn't matter how attractive one is, if yhe conversation doesn't flow and is difficult then it is gard to create a connection.

What you're saying reminds me of a couple of friends I have. I can relate myself from a non online dating perspective. Guys find me attractive, but things kind of petter off because I'm so flipping awkward.

These lasses are lovely, but even I find them a bit difficult to converse with. Not sure how men find them. They are single. They just have a very dry way of talking. A bit awkward and clipped. They come over a bit condescending, but I do think that's because they are shy and anxious and are just very matter of fact in their manner.

they can come over like school teachers rather than friendly. I don't know if I'm like that, but I may be,

The_Face_of_Boo
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27 May 2017, 8:27 am

I assure you that it's all about the sex appeal.

The_Face_of_Boo
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27 May 2017, 8:39 am

Quote:

You think that guys typically think like women; that's your first mistake.

Just because a guy is seeking a serious relationship that doesn't mean he would decline a hookup if given the chance.

So if he finds the girl attractive despite not being compatible, yet the girl wants a hookup or something short term; then the typical guy would not say no to that.

hurtloam
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27 May 2017, 8:49 am

The_Face_of_Boo wrote:

Quote:

Did she say she wanted a hookup? No, she didn't.

More of Boo putting

the women down on wrong planet.

See this is why you're single. You're a really negative person

The_Face_of_Boo
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27 May 2017, 8:59 am

hurtloam wrote:

The_Face_of_Boo wrote:

Quote:

Did she say she wanted a hookup? No, she didn't.

More of Boo putting

the women down on wrong planet.

See this is why you're single. You're a really negative person

Nope, I am single because of other factors; negativity is a connequence.

But I am not being negative toward slw; she is puzzled and I am trying to help her to solve it.

The way she is describing the guys' reactions is so typical when someone does *not* find the date attractive. I would say the same if the OP was male; I am not less harsh with guys here because it is something I have experienced myself a lot too (when a date does not find me attractive from the very first second); I have quite an experience in that.

Btw, I am single but sexually active.

Last edited by The_Face_of_Boo on 27 May 2017, 9:02 am, edited 1 time in total.

hurtloam
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27 May 2017, 9:02 am

You're such a know it all with your posts though. Your'e not actually offering her any helpful advice. You're just like, "I understand and no one else does. This is the thing. I won't actually offer any actual advice though. I'll just make a blunt statement." It's a put down in that you're making yourself look intellectually and socially superior.

The_Face_of_Boo
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27 May 2017, 9:05 am

Knowing what might be the problem is helpful.

Aristophanes
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27 May 2017, 10:41 am

The_Face_of_Boo wrote:

I assure you that it's all about the sex appeal.

Sex appeal is subjective, hence the reason someone can be attractive to one person and repulsive to another. That doesn't explain why she's had problems with virtually everyone.

slw1990
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27 May 2017, 4:26 pm

Aristophanes wrote:

The_Face_of_Boo wrote:

I assure you that it's all about the sex appeal.

Sex appeal is subjective, hence the reason someone can be attractive to one person and repulsive to another. That doesn't explain why she's had problems with virtually everyone.

Some of it might be that I'm sometimes bad with replying and I'm very careful with giving out my number. I remember a guy told me that he thought it was strange that I didn't want to give out my number after a second date and lost interest.

slw1990
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27 May 2017, 11:47 pm

hurtloam wrote:

I've been looking up different things about sex appeal and a lot of it seems to revolve around having good social skills. There were different articles that said smiling, making good eye contact, being enthusiastic and having good conversational skills are what make people have sex appeal. I struggle with most of these things so this is probably a part of why guys don't find me attractive.

The_Face_of_Boo
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28 May 2017, 3:21 am

Aristophanes wrote:

The_Face_of_Boo wrote:

I assure you that it's all about the sex appeal.

Sex appeal is subjective, hence the reason someone can be attractive to one person and repulsive to another. That doesn't explain why she's had problems with virtually everyone.

It's not as subjective as you think.

Aristophanes
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28 May 2017, 7:34 am

The_Face_of_Boo wrote:

Aristophanes wrote:

The_Face_of_Boo wrote:

I assure you that it's all about the sex appeal.

Sex appeal is subjective, hence the reason someone can be attractive to one person and repulsive to another. That doesn't explain why she's had problems with virtually everyone.

It's not as subjective as you think.

The_Face_of_Boo
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28 May 2017, 8:46 am

Aristophanes wrote:

The_Face_of_Boo wrote:

Aristophanes wrote:

The_Face_of_Boo wrote:

I assure you that it's all about the sex appeal.

Sex appeal is subjective, hence the reason someone can be attractive to one person and repulsive to another. That doesn't explain why she's had problems with virtually everyone.

It's not as subjective as you think.

Most people often agree what's sexy and what's not - same for the sex appeal.
Some people are sexually attractive to the majority of the opposite sex while others aren't.

And there's strong cultural influence to it.

You are exaggerating the human uniqueness in all this.

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