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ZachGoodwin
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12 Jun 2017, 5:50 pm

We all want attention, and we all want to be that one person in the room who says the right thing at the right time, but the truthful way of being that, is to be the type of person that doesn't try to win people over. If you try to win people over, you end up losing people. It's like in romance films where there is the guy who has it all and tries to win the girl over unlike the guy who has nothing and naturally gets the girl by connecting. What's the reason why the guy with nothing earns the girl? Not trying to earn people. Don't try to win people over.

However, If people are connecting with you, and you are being accused of being selfish, so what you made it. Ignore the accusations. You are a superstar.



fselzr
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25 Jun 2017, 5:53 pm

The reason are goals and motives of the girl. If a girl notice that person accomodates her expectations and wishes, then she chooses a guy. Unfortunately most of women are interested in rather not ambitious things, like sponsoring, when she only loves guy for money, comfort, prestige and position, or partying and changing a partner when it becomes useless for her or boring. It's unfortunately something like treating person only as a tool for real, while playing, lying and creating a false image to get what they want. I personally don't care about it, because it's like it is, not much for me to do, rather than waiting and trying a find person who is going actually to support me and love me, while I'm doing the same for her, regardless of my material goods and anything like that.



CharityGoodyGrace
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15 Jul 2017, 7:58 pm

You can try to win people over in the sense that you care genuinely about them and want to help them and know how to. That is the right time to win people over, and you can teach yourself to care about everyone. Just think about what they have in common with you, how you'd feel in their situations, and most of all, remember they are God's children no matter what they do (though of course they may need to be corrected) just like us.



hurtloam
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15 Jul 2017, 9:01 pm

There's definitely a line. You can try and be helpful or interested in a person, but if you do it too much you can be seen to be trying too hard. Especially in the acquaintance stage of getting to know a potential friend. Being over familiar too soon is creepy.

That's kind of difficult to judge for us on the spectrum. I feel like I err too much on the side of caution and end up not trying enough and people think I don't care about them. It's really difficult.