D&D group member keeps using "autistic" as an insult.

Post Reply New Topic

I play D&D with some guys. They're cool and all, but one of them has on more than one occasion used the term "autistic" as an insult. First time I was flummoxed and didn't know what to say. Second time I glared at him and he noticed but I don't know what he thought.

I used to present really differently from my peers. People tell me that I should take this as a compliment because he could "never have thought" that I had Autism.

I want to tell him to stop because while I am not angry at him, (he is young and doesn't think about these things), he will not know in college or life who has an Autistic loved one or is on the spectrum themselves. At our age, a lot of Autistics can blend in and he wouldn't know until they got pissed at him.

It is quite likely that that person didn't know any better.
Nowadays, nearly any online community uses "autistic" as an insult indeed, and it is very easy to pick up that habit yourself.

I would recommend you simply ask that person to stop using the term (if you didn't yet). If they don't agree, this isn't a person you want to associate with.

Then again, i do also recommend to keep playing D&D, it can do wonders for your social skills. (it did for me)

We need to start an anti-stigma campaign about autism, people don't insult Down's kids so much any more (they seem to prefer calling people autistic as an insult) but that may be because they're all being aborted. We need to start making movies and books about cool autistic people! And talking about famous autistics in every field, and doing cool speeches on cool autistics.

You could ask him 'are you autistic.'? lol

A more straightforward option is asking, point-blank, "Do you know anyone who actually is?" Since he may/may not have picked up on the glare you gave him, this could be a direct-but-not-exactly confrontational way to press the point a little further. Putting someone on the spot ever so delicately can be powerful.