Why do you think a relationship will make you happy?

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Thank you. We are very enlightened now. No one has ever told us that before.

Ugh - I really hate sarcasm. Desist please.

Its a point worth reiterating because there is a widely held belief that a relationship offers completion and wholeness. I think that the union of lovers within a relationship results in an emergent structure the qualities of which are determined by what each person brings to the thing. If one member is broken the other must transfuse their own strength and vitality into the other. The relationship is thus parasitic, vampyric etc and the structure is fundamentally unbalanced.

I don't think that everyone who is single who would like a relationship thinks that it will make them whole or magically solve their problems. It's very condescending to assume that.

These are people with odd quirks and social issues that make them overlooked. People who have never known love.

They just want to be normal.

They need understanding not patronising

Well few think of it as the panacea but there is an elusive ideal that we all chase which places a sort of singularity beyond the discovery of "the one", that is many do believe that discovering the one will bring about total transformation. I believe that the ability to identify a potential partner is predicated on knowing oneself and that this transformation is a collaborative process. Yes this has been said by way too many but again it is worth reiterating.

I have never had a relationship so I can only spout speculation and theory but my observations of humanity suggest that I am on the right lines.

I disagree with this massively. And here is why. So in most cases what you say is true but there is a catch 22 here.

Example in a video game league diamond 5 is the top 1.5% players in the world. For me obtaining it was extremely hard the first time. I had nerves, I would get frustrated at constant failure, and get burnt out trying. I think the same thing applies here.

BUT once I got diamond the first time, I got it on another account in less than a week. How could something that took me a year to a complies and was hard go from hard to easy in one day? It's all about my state of mind. Once I achieved the rank I didn't care about it as much. I was more at ease and it was easier to play and win.

Same applies here. People who haven't had any success with women are more prone to failure till they reach some form of sucess that puts them at ease with future endeavors. And if you have never gotten your sucess....well.... you can see how it would be hard to feel complete without knowing the taste at least once.

Totally agree with this. Also we agreed in your response to my post lol before this then said we bump heads. We don't really bump heads I just want the best for you. You seem like one of the nice ones on here I hate to see you go in circles. And no its not over for you dating wise. Unless you are morbidly obese just make an ok cupid and pick guys based off of 50% profile picture and 50% what their profile says. If they seem like socially akward guys with no game pounce like a lion. Because those guys are the best.

They stay with you forever out of loyalty, love and you inspire them to be better. That's how men love works till it gets corrupted imo.

Better to loved and lost then never loved .

So true. You can't be confident with women if yiu haven't had any success to build confidence off of. That's all confidence is , it's past good experiences.
That's why plumbers work as a apprentice first to build good experiences so they'll be confident in the future.

Medical interns are un confident m doctors with 20 years good experience are confident and some cases over confident

Of course it won't solve problems magically, but being in love with an "equally broken" person can absolutely make you more "whole".

One of my biggest fears in life is that no girl will ever truly love me.

Of course getting a girlfriend won't change anything.

If Im worried no woman will ever love me or want to be with me then a woman who falls in love with me and wants to be with me won't change this.

Not necessarily, I knew plenty of broken people (usually are women, in real life men never admit their sad feelings regarding their single status) who were sad about their single status for long, and then suddenly they become happy after finding someone.

I want a relationship because i want someone to make me feel safe. Also i don't want to be left alone when i get old and sick since there's not much social services in my country..

The 1st time in my life that I was really happy & felt accepted & truly loved was when I was in my 1st realtionship. I haven't really felt those things after till I was in my 2nd relationship, & then not till my current one.

Still relevant!

I'm gonna tell you what an old post from a website told me. Even though you look bad, what makes you look worse is if you give off this vibe of I'll always be a virgin and no one will ever love me. Dude really? No one will ever love you? We live in the 21st century, there will always be someone who loves you. There are plenty of fish in the sea, so you have to keep fishing. And hey, fishing isn't as easy as it seems, and that's one part of the analogy most people forgot. It won't be easy, but you do can get a fish in the end. You get zero fish when you stare at the water yelling at the fish to fly into your boat.

Since you put it that way, it’s nothing an antique telephone or a stick of dynamite couldn’t fix.

Some people don't seem to make any effort and they've got fish jumping right into their boat.

I'm honestly sick of being judged. I'd rather be known as happily single even if it's a lie than have people giving me stupid 'advice' like I'm too independent or some other criticism of my character.

That work you're referring to is to much like being constantly torn apart by other people who can't see anything to love in me and I don't want to play anymore.

I don't think any of my single female friends will find anyone either. So we'll just have our own little friendships and forget about what everyone else is doing.

We don't want to be single, but we're never good enough so what's the point? We don't even talk about guys we like anymore. It's just not a topic of conversation. That part of our lives is over and we will look for contentment instead of chasing the wind. I'm the last to get in board with the idea. They've been telling me for a few years just to let it go and enjoy my life.

I'll join the other sexually invisible women.