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Hello, I am a female, 15 years old. I am from the U.S. I do not have an official diagnosis as of now but I am seeking to do so. I have always been "odd." Even as a toddler I had trouble socializing. I would prefer to be alone or with adults, and still to this day. It got harder as I grew up, I just didn't fit in, my peers would snicker and gossip about me and I didn't understand why. I didn't have friends and my teachers would worry and talk to my parents about it. I had counseling when I was 8 but it didn't help much. By the time I entered middle school I had become fairly good at hiding my social problems. But my peers would still make fun of me for reaons that I could not understand. When I was 13 my parents decided to have a psychological evaluation be done. This was because I had been experiencing more severe symptoms. I have never been able to stand flashing or bright lights. I can't stand noises either. Social settings were, and still are disastrous. I would shutdown and those around me would become very worried. I stopped pretending and my parents would become frustrated and embarrassed that I couldn't have a proper conversation with someone. I would have meltdowns for things that they considered irrelevant but to me meant a lot. Things like having to sit on the left side of the car instead of on the right, having to eat rice with a spoon, people talking as I tried to watch television, or plans getting canceled. My mom was also worried about my obsession with names and drawing rectangles, also my strange self-soothing habits that I didn't realize I had. Like shaking my leg, rocking my body, or moving my hand in a strange way. After the evaluation I was referred to a psychiatrist who would diagnose me. After an hour of the same questions he "diagnosed" me. He would type in the symptoms on a computer which would diagnose me for him. The computer diagnosed me with autism. And after more than three failed attempts of changing the diagnosis my psychiatrist decided to manually type my "diagnosis". He said "this is not autism, this is just anxiety" he diagnosed me with Generalized Anxiety Disorder. I was furious, I did not have GAD. I knew it was something more than that. I didn't feel anxious all the time nor did I worry about stressful events constantly. I wouldn't describe my shutdowns as panic attacks nor would I describe my discomfort around people, light, or sound as fear or phobias. Then he put me on Prozac. I went home furious. I knew about autism but I had never really linked it to myself. I did lots of research and my whole life fit in that diagnosis. Everything made sense. I went to the psychiatrist over the course of two years in which he only increased my dose to the max because my symptoms were not improving at all. Then I told my mom I no longer wanted to go. I told her that I did not believe my diagnosis was correct and that those two years did not help at all. So I stopped going. No more group therapy, no more counseling, no more psychiatrist, no more drugs. I am sure I have autism, I meet the dsm-5 criteria perfectly (I have more symptoms than the ones I mentioned above). It just all makes sense. A few days ago my mom confessed that she had always suspected I was on the spectrum, I hadn't told her anything about my suspicions as well. She studied psychology when she was in college. As of today, I am not receiving any mental health related help. I will soon talk to my mom so that I can get a proper diagnosis. It would bring so much peace to my life. I have a couple of questions though. What tests did you take during your diagnosis process? How long did it take?

Thank you!

Welcome to Wrong Planet!

Welcome to Wrong Planet!