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EverythingAndNothing
Snowy Owl
Snowy Owl

Joined: 7 Jul 2017
Age: 32
Gender: Female
Posts: 133

10 Jul 2017, 6:49 pm

Even though I've always excelled in school, I've always had major anxiety issues surrounding it. To me, the academic aspect is extremely easy but I easily become overwhelmed by having to participate in things like group projects and class discussions. When I was 18, despite my protests that I didn't think it was a good idea, my father forced me to attend college by threatening to kick me out of the house if I didn't go. Although I somehow managed to make it through the first semester, by the second my mental health collapsed and I became so anxious that I stopped attending two of my classes that were heavily based on group interactions.

For the past few years I've been living on my own and working as a personal trainer and I've been feeling very dissatisfied in my life because I thrive in academics and I feel like I'm really underachieving by not living up to my potential. Last semester I decided that I wanted to get back into taking classes, but I was so scared of attending classes on a campus with other people that I ending up enrolling in an online business degree that allowed me to take all of my courses at home.

However, I have literally no interest in a business degree and I signed up for it just because I could do it online.

But I'm starting to think that this was a mistake and I'm looking at maybe re-enrolling in proper classes again even though I'm absolutely terrified it will be another disaster.

So I guess I'm wondering if anyone has had success going back later on or do you think it's likely to be more of the same? Because I still get extremely overwhelmed in group situations and I'm not sure how to go about dealing with that when it comes up.



shortfatbalduglyman
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 4 Mar 2017
Age: 40
Gender: Male
Posts: 9,709

11 Jul 2017, 9:14 pm

Even though I've always excelled in school, I've always had major anxiety issues surrounding it. To me, the academic aspect is extremely easy but I easily become overwhelmed by having to participate in things like group projects and class discussions. When I was 18, despite my protests that I didn't think it was a good idea, my father forced me to attend college by threatening to kick me out of the house if I didn't go. Although I somehow managed to make it through the first semester, by the second my mental health collapsed and I became so anxious that I stopped attending two of my classes that were heavily based on group interactions.

For the past few years I've been living on my own and working as a personal trainer and I've been feeling very dissatisfied in my life because I thrive in academics and I feel like I'm really underachieving by not living up to my potential. Last semester I decided that I wanted to get back into taking classes, but I was so scared of attending classes on a campus with other people that I ending up enrolling in an online business degree that allowed me to take all of my courses at home.

However, I have literally no interest in a business degree and I signed up for it just because I could do it online.

But I'm starting to think that this was a mistake and I'm looking at maybe re-enrolling in proper classes again even though I'm absolutely terrified it will be another disaster.

So I guess I'm wondering if anyone has had success going back later on or do you think it's likely to be more of the same? Because I still get extremely overwhelmed in group situations and I'm not sure how to go about dealing with that when it comes up.
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if you think or feel, that you have changed in a significant way, socially and emotionally. such that you would find college easier now, than when you were 18, then you might find success.

working as a personal trainer sounds does not sound like a job that autistics are usually good at. but that is just my opinion. and i am not a personal trainer. nor have i ever had a personal trainer. the personal trainer works one on one with clients. the client gets a chance to misinterpret every word and movement of the personal trainer.

but, of course. whatever works for you. b/c i am just a stranger on the Internet.

you might go to a different college or major than when you were 18. that could make a difference.

check that website, Rate My Professors.

the other thing, is that. on the first day instructors give out the syllabus. see if it mentions groupwork.

major in something with less groupwork.

if you have not gotten a diagnosis, get one. disclose to the school. get testing accommodations. see if you can get accommodations for groupwork.



EverythingAndNothing
Snowy Owl
Snowy Owl

Joined: 7 Jul 2017
Age: 32
Gender: Female
Posts: 133

12 Jul 2017, 8:28 am

Personal training is absolutely not a common job but I've made it work for me. I specialize in working with older adults and elderly clients who I find it easier to communicate with. I work with few people under the age of 65 and primarily on postural and balance issues so it's a much different job than one initially thinks of when thinking of personal training. Anatomy and kinesiology is also an area that I am extremely interested in so I find it easier to talk about that to people.

The funny thing is that I was pursuing a mathematics degree at the time and there was still a lot of group work. One of the classes that I stopped attending was an upper level calculus class that was unexpectedly heavy on group discussions and presenting work and explanations for it in front of the class. I was great at the math itself but I would completely freeze and be unable to speak at all when suddenly asked a question during a lecture. I actually failed a discussion test in which all you had to do to pass was contribute one thing to a discussion.

I spoke with an admissions counselor yesterday and I think I'm going to try again at an engineering degree and just hope for the best. I think I'm in a better place now but it's hard to say. Although I was "diagnosed" a few years ago by two professionals, one of whom that had asperger's herself, I do not have an official diagnosis because I resisted it at the time and insisted that they were wrong. However, going back to school is making me think that I might benefit from getting an official one just in case I need assistance in certain aspects. I'll have to look into whether there's anyone local that might be able to re-assess me.



shortfatbalduglyman
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 4 Mar 2017
Age: 40
Gender: Male
Posts: 9,709

13 Jul 2017, 9:24 pm

Personal training is absolutely not a common job but I've made it work for me. I specialize in working with older adults and elderly clients who I find it easier to communicate with. I work with few people under the age of 65 and primarily on postural and balance issues so it's a much different job than one initially thinks of when thinking of personal training. Anatomy and kinesiology is also an area that I am extremely interested in so I find it easier to talk about that to people.

The funny thing is that I was pursuing a mathematics degree at the time and there was still a lot of group work. One of the classes that I stopped attending was an upper level calculus class that was unexpectedly heavy on group discussions and presenting work and explanations for it in front of the class. I was great at the math itself but I would completely freeze and be unable to speak at all when suddenly asked a question during a lecture. I actually failed a discussion test in which all you had to do to pass was contribute one thing to a discussion.

I spoke with an admissions counselor yesterday and I think I'm going to try again at an engineering degree and just hope for the best. I think I'm in a better place now but it's hard to say. Although I was "diagnosed" a few years ago by two professionals, one of whom that had asperger's herself, I do not have an official diagnosis because I resisted it at the time and insisted that they were wrong. However, going back to school is making me think that I might benefit from getting an official one just in case I need assistance in certain aspects. I'll have to look into whether there's anyone local that might be able to re-assess me.
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check with the school first. talk to the disabled students department. find out what the standards are, for which psychologists can diagnose you. for example, at UCSD, when i was a student, it told me that psychologists from ucsd could not diagnose learning disabilities. nor could any professional from Kaiser. it had to be a phd. it had to specialize in learning disabilities.

yeah in my fifth (5) undergrad year, i flunked out Structural Engineering. it had nothing to do with groupwork. while working with precious lil arrogant "people" got on my nerves, it did not cause me to flunk.

what branch of engineering? bioengineering?

when i was in structural engineering, some classes were only taught one quarter (quarter system) per year. by one instructor. and the other classes the students are required to take for that year, require that course as a prereq. so, if you flunk one class, then you can't take other classes you were scheduled to take. in other words if you flunk one class, in some cases it sets you back one year.

seriously bioengineering is hard.