10 year age gap. Can a 29 old date a 19 year old?

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sly279
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09 Aug 2017, 11:38 pm

New lady at work is cute I'm trying to talk to her as much as me can when she goes by. Other lady things I should "just make a move" (i dont know how) and that the new lady is nice. She smiles when I talk to her but then so do some other girls who are in relationships so i dont know. Anyways I looked her up on Facebook and she graduated high school in 2016, so that'd make her 18/19 :/



Chronos
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09 Aug 2017, 11:47 pm

sly279 wrote:
New lady at work is cute I'm trying to talk to her as much as me can when she goes by. Other lady things I should "just make a move" (i dont know how) and that the new lady is nice. She smiles when I talk to her but then so do some other girls who are in relationships so i dont know. Anyways I looked her up on Facebook and she graduated high school in 2016, so that'd make her 18/19 :/


At 19 I still thought 24 year olds were a lot older than me. At 19, most people still have a lot of growing to do, and though I was very mature, I was still 19.

I think your question is, is it unethical? And I think answers on that would be varied. My cousin was in her early 20's when she started dating a man in his early 30's and family was not thrilled. Ultimately though the decision is between you and the girl but don't be surprised if she thinks you are too old for her.



sly279
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09 Aug 2017, 11:57 pm

Should I avoid and ignore her then? :(

Why is 10 or more year gap seen as acceptable later in life?



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10 Aug 2017, 12:01 am

sly279 wrote:
Should I avoid and ignore her then? :(


I think you should just treat her in a civil manner as you would anyone else.

sly279 wrote:
Why is 10 or more year gap seen as acceptable later in life?


At 19, the brain is still developing, this the person is still developing, so there are significant differences between the brain and psyche of your average 19 year old, vs. the brain and psyche of your average 29 year old.

At 35, the brain is fully developed and so there is not much, if any difference between the brain of your average 35 year old and 45 year old.



sly279
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10 Aug 2017, 12:48 am

Chronos wrote:
sly279 wrote:
Should I avoid and ignore her then? :(


I think you should just treat her in a civil manner as you would anyone else.

sly279 wrote:
Why is 10 or more year gap seen as acceptable later in life?


At 19, the brain is still developing, this the person is still developing, so there are significant differences between the brain and psyche of your average 19 year old, vs. the brain and psyche of your average 29 year old.

At 35, the brain is fully developed and so there is not much, if any difference between the brain of your average 35 year old and 45 year old.

Another lady at work is 20 and her bf is 28.

Seems lots of 40-50'old guys date 25-35 old women too.

Why would the one lady tell me to make a move knowing our age differences



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10 Aug 2017, 3:31 am

Personally I don't see anything wrong in it.



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10 Aug 2017, 6:21 am

Nothing wrong with it but do remember that if you have a fight and break up, you will see each other every day at work.

As the old saying goes: "Don't s**t where you eat".


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10 Aug 2017, 8:10 am

As long as the two people dating each other are Legal-Adults*, it's a non-issue.

Age* does not matter and neither does ethnicity.

The only thing that matters is character.

If I had a 20 year old daughter and she wanted to date a 30 year old African-American guy - as long as he had a good heart and loved her, and could support her, I would be fine with it.



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10 Aug 2017, 8:48 am

Go for it, dude. You have an opportunity at the very least - best not to waste it.


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sly279
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10 Aug 2017, 9:22 am

Ichinin wrote:
Nothing wrong with it but do remember that if you have a fight and break up, you will see each other every day at work.

As the old saying goes: "Don't s**t where you eat".


It's retail store so she won't be around long just until she moves on to better things. Though it's not like I interact with anyone else besides the person I take over for or who takes over for me. People downstairs thoug are all friends or start dating each other. I think it's normal to pair off with someone from the place you go to every day.

Work is the only place I'd meet women as I just work and go home. I may not be working here in month anyways I suspect I'll get fired after my 2nd yearly review



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10 Aug 2017, 9:32 am

In that case - go for it, and if she is interested boink her brains out :D

It's different when you have a job that you will keep for a couple of years.


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sly279
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10 Aug 2017, 9:50 am

Ichinin wrote:
In that case - go for it, and if she is interested boink her brains out :D

It's different when you have a job that you will keep for a couple of years.


Well hope to keep the job.

Guessing you mean sex?
I want a relationship. If I did ask her out I'd like it to last long time, care and respect her.
Takes me a while to feel comfortable talking about sex with woman, I need emotional connection.



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10 Aug 2017, 9:59 am

sly279 wrote:
Ichinin wrote:
In that case - go for it, and if she is interested boink her brains out :D

It's different when you have a job that you will keep for a couple of years.


Well hope to keep the job.

Guessing you mean sex?
I want a relationship. If I did ask her out I'd like it to last long time, care and respect her.
Takes me a while to feel comfortable talking about sex with woman, I need emotional connection.


Don't be simp sly, seriously.

If she wants to have sex and you don't give it to her, she will lose all interest/respect for you.



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10 Aug 2017, 10:23 am

sly279 wrote:
Ichinin wrote:
In that case - go for it, and if she is interested boink her brains out :D

It's different when you have a job that you will keep for a couple of years.


Well hope to keep the job.

Guessing you mean sex?
I want a relationship. If I did ask her out I'd like it to last long time, care and respect her.
Takes me a while to feel comfortable talking about sex with woman, I need emotional connection.


Younger women are usually more about sex and exploration than forming a meaningful relationship. But if she's interested in that, congratulations.


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whatamievendoing
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10 Aug 2017, 11:42 am

Ichinin wrote:
Younger women are usually more about sex and exploration than forming a meaningful relationship.


Are they? I've largely gotten the opposite impression.


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