10 year age gap. Can a 29 old date a 19 year old?

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I don't think that most people think it's ok for a 30 year old woman to have sex with a 14 year old boy. I've heard men comment how lucky the boy is because they could only dream about having sex with someone with breasts at that age, however the desire of a 14 year old boy to have sex doesn't make it right for a 30 year old woman to have sex with him, because the actions on the part of the woman are exploitative, not in the child's best interest, and there is often a power differential between the two, with the woman in a position of authority over the boy. These women are predators no different than 30 year old men who have sex with 14 year old girls.

My 2nd girlfriend was 19 when I was 28. We met on this forum. Part of the reason our relationship didn't work is because she was dependent on her parents to help pay for college & they wanted things on their terms. I was willing to work with them but it was frustrating for both of us & we were long distance. That girl your taking about sly may be dependent on her parents too & if she is youd'd both have to make sure you try & work with their terms if they have any. My 2nd exes parents were more controlling than lots thou.

it really varies. in probably 90% of cases, the answer is a hard no.

first, you have to think about where you were when you were 19. what were your ambitions and goals? what did you want in a partner? what was your mental state like? because the majority of us, had no good answers to those questions. at 19, we're discovering the independent adult world for the first time. and you're 10 whole years ahead of this person. at 29, you should have your life mapped out to some extent, where you live, who you are, what your long term goals are, and if you don't, you probably aren't very mature - and that's probably why you're even open to the idea of dating a teenager to begin with. because if you had those things, you wouldn't be interested at all in someone who's just learning to be an adult.

while it's possible for someone to be mature at 19, that's just for their time - maybe they've experienced more or are on a good track in life. that's awesome, but you still have 11 years of experience in the adult world, and they barely have 1. they might not know what a real, loving, committed relationship requires or entails.

however, you're both still technically adults, so, have at it. just ask yourself, why would you want to date someone who's 19? i'll bet you 9 times out of 10, the answer is "i'm lonely" or "i just want to have coitus" and there's nothing wrong with that, it's just important you be honest with yourself so you don't end up with a broken heart. it is very possible that the age difference can be ignored, you each find what you want in each other and be happy. it just isn't that likely. remember - who you were at 19 vs 29, is likely very different.

I’m very much the same I was as 19 except less naive about credits , women and “Love”

I’m a loser. That’s clear I don’t have my life together and won’t ever have it together and this women 23+ won’t touch me with a 100 foot pole.

^ In that case you and her both have the same level of maturity. Did you ask her out yet?

I’m with RetroGamer ask her out! It’s 10 years I dated a 29year old at 19 it didn’t work out but that was because he was a pot head not cause of his age.

Now if we’re convinced u it’s where to ask her to... and if u can do it without looking like an idiot if she says no cause u have to work with her so we gotta be clued in here

Trivia maybe? Mixes alcohol with someone else making a 3rd of the conversation?

Last edited by Cat23 on 15 Nov 2017, 12:48 am, edited 1 time in total.

Well Sly's not a pothead so he already has a big advantage over your ex!

True true! Anyway I’m pretty sure 10 years is nothing 29 to 39 is normal... 49 to 59, 89 to 99 all pretty normal...

but if the woman was older that’s not so normal but still ok just a bit unusual.

Unless their a Phillipino and which case back to normal

Lots of things I read said that us Aspies mature slower than our peers & our mental age is a third less than our physical ages on average. I divided 29 by 3 & then timesed it by 2 on my calc to see what a third less of 29 is & it came to 19.3 so a 29 year-old Aspie may be at about the same mental age as 19 year-old. Also women tend to mature faster than guys on average & so a 19 year-old girl may be more mature mentally than a 29 year-old Aspie guy.

You're an adult, she's an adult. What's the problem?

My wife (smart, beautiful, assertive, NT) and I have an 18-year age difference.We got together when she was 24 and I was 42. Twelve years later, we're still together and have two kids. So I'd say it's about how the two people relate, not about fitting into anyone's preconceptions about what is or isn't appropriate.

My father is 25 years older than his present wife. They’re still going strong, celebrating their 30th anniversary this year.

Only if the younger woman is interested. Older guys have to accept "no" if the lady isn't interested.

My crazy ex and my wife are 14 years apart in age. It never once occurred to me that either one was a mismatch due to age. Yes, my ex is nuts but she would still be an overgrown toddler no matter what her biological age. Go figure that the women I dated my own age never worked out but much older and much younger did (for a while that is).

I also had a friend who was 31 and dated a 19 year old. It didn't last because of the maturity gap: she was far too mature for him.

Yes, it actually makes sense for a young women to marry a guy who is older if she wants to quickly have a family. An older guy is more likely to have a steady job that will support a family and enough money saved up to buy a house or at least enough to take out a mortgage.

So what about 35year old woman to a 66year old man. Assuming financially successful on both sides obviously the man more so due to more years and being a man (men seem more interested in making money).

Totally hypothetical would the man just dismiss the women’s intentions cause he would assume he was too old and that he had his signals crossed? Would the normal signs work in this situation? Like the textbook stuff? Assuming the man liked the woman. Urgh there’s probably a reason this doesn’t happen in reality.

When President Trump married the First Lady their ages were 58 and 34. According to Cosmo they first got together when she was 28.

Last edited by BTDT on 15 Nov 2017, 5:35 pm, edited 1 time in total.