Too late to make new friends?

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I sometimes feel like it's too late to make new friends. People my age (late 20's) just seem to only socialize with the friends they made years before or look at their cellphones. I don't have any childhood friends and most of the few friends I've had in the last 7 years of my life either moved away due to something they couldn't avoid or they moved away and decided they no longer had time for me or hated me.

Nope. Never too late for anything. You just have to make an effort, scary as that might sound.

My efforts this year have been disappointing, though. I am terrified the rest of my life will be a lonely agonizing walk to my death. My past is full of rejection from other people and I hoped my future would be different. It hasn't.

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All other things being equal, I would imagine that, after college, it becomes harder to make friends

But maybe it just takes more effort

Anyways it was hard enough in college

And now I am 34

And not in school or work

So the opportunity for regular interaction is limited

On the other hand I also have more free time and live somewhere less homophobic

So whatever

I hated college. Everything was so disappointing and I feel deceived by those who told me it was going to be good for me.

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some parts of college, i hated. ucsd.

hated: so many homophobes, feeling financially deprived living with the rich(er), almost everyone was superficial, materialistic and condescending to someone different from them (me)

loved: biking. for the first couple years, the hope/fantasy of becoming successful. false hope.

I've just a buttload of indifferent acquaintances and a few people masquerading as friends. If life were a poker hand, I'd fold.....hahahaha

I sometimes wish there was a button I could press that would destroy any desire in me to socialize.

College isn't for everyone. In fact, I have heard that lots of the successful people already have hands on skills such as welding, building, computers etc.

As for those of you who are lonely, you have to like the person who lives inside of you in order to be happy. Now while having the right friends can help move you forward, they can't completely fill your void. Rather, you have to learn to be comfortable with being alone. Sometimes you have to learn to be your own best friend.

By the way Marnkis, are you interested in astronomy because as you know, we have a solar eclipse and maybe you want to join a group of people who enjoy solar eclipses. Now I don't know about you but I am very excited about that.

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Likewise. Sometimes it turns out that someone is not as trustworthy, predictable or awesome as they appeared to be.

And with unusual clinical diagnosis, such as autism, (and the cetera) you (and. I) are in the minority. NTs often misinterpret statements and actions from autistics. It takes so much energy to interact with NTs. And there are not many autistics. And autistics do not put on a sign that says that they are autistics.

If you approach someone they might socially reject you. In an unlimited number of ways. Subject to imagination.

Emotions are not always logical.

And then it takes a lot of time and energy to cope with the long term effects of their rejec5ion

And if they accept you, they just accepted you for that minute. Does not guarantee anything about any other minute.

And if they accept you, then what?

Whoop for do

You and they then do what, hold hands skipping into the sunset?

I was never taught skills like those things. My father was very distant and put more care into the stock market (Didn't make anything out of it) as well as cheating on my mother (She did the same, too). Instead of encouraging me to develop as a person, they kept me shut up in my room and told me "Don't do this, don't do that! Don't say this, don't say that!" to keep me in line. I think they were trying to hide their messed up personal lives from my siblings and I.

I don't know where it comes from but being alone felt like a bad thing to me. I guess it comes from how in popular media, the happy people have friends while the lonely people are sad. I do sometimes want to be alone if I am tired, want to read a book, and play a single player video game but in the back of my mind, I still feel down that I have to live a lonely existence.

I looked up on Meet Up but I couldn't find any groups interested in astronomy.

In terms of the solar eclipse, I would start by going online and looking for events in your area related to the eclipse and maybe get yourself some index cards and a pin which have you the perfect pinhole camera. Otherwise, go find an open field and enjoy yourself.

As far as learning those skills go, sometimes you have to teach yourself and that's what I was taught. That starts with going to websites and learning online tutorials and creating a hobby from those skills. For instance, Khan Academy, and code.com can help.
You could also read some books based on those skills.

Maybe you want to learn how to build something which requires welding or using power tools such as a sculpture.

Finally, learning to create a portfolio can help where you can sell your work on websites like "Thumbtack.com"

In terms of anyone teaching you, it sounds like you might need to find someone to mentor you because those are the ones who are going to bring you up as a person.

It's never too late.
Sometimes you have to do the approaching though.

If you google lost friends, moved to have a new start.
You will find many NT stories of friends abandoning them, or they leave to get away from bad people - and have to get a whole new lot of friends.

Also many NT's fall out with childhood friends or even grow appart from their childhood/school friends.

Keep in mind that the vast majority of NT's are fickle/selfish, and they don't genuinely 'care' about their friends.
Also when they say 'friends' they usually mean 'aquaintance' or 'associate' or 'work colleague' (that they are only keeping in touch with to gossip/search for related job opportunities.

So it is important that you take a similar approach.
There are stages:

1. Someone that you know.
2. Someone that you share some experience/topic with
3. Someone that you spend some time with
4. 'friend'; an associate that you get on with
5. possibly a genuine friend
6. 1 year or more, actual friend, they are also not likely to judge you too harshly & understand your eccentricities* [Also depends on how much time you spend with them.]
7. many years, best friend. [Also depends on how much time you spend with them.]

Keep in mind that all friends can be lost; grow appart, change interests, find better friends, move location

* Everyone has eccentricities - NT's just lie about them/or mask them from others to appear "normal"

People make friends in nursing homes all the time.....

I feel the same way, but it's unlikely I'll be the only one who loses friends or moves. A lot of people are also busy raising kids, which I'm not.

There are lots of kids who are rejected by their parents or have lost one or the other and end up in special programs that you can volunteer in like "Big Brothers and Sisters"