Are aspies bad boyfriends?

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Are we incompatibility with relationships?
I worry I will be

If we work at it, we can be pretty darn good.

One thing we have is dedication to friendship.

Statistics are not a 100%. Statistics do have flaws.

We're great in bed.

Statistics?
I just see a lot of women complaining about their aspie bf or having to break up with them.
Do aspies change when they're in a relationship?
I'd like to hope relationship could work but now I worry it can't and I really want a relationship so I can love someone

You have to get out there, Sly.

Many Aspies/Autistic people have successful relationships.

How is that girl in the store?

I dont know I'm stressed about work currently
She's across the break room currently

I'm too anxious to attempt talk to her around others :s

One reoccuring theme I see in some of those posts is it seems like the aspie in question, either won't or is unable to make time for a girlfriend/boyfriend...or they are unwilling to budge on things. For instance maybe they want to play video games all night their girlfriend would like a little affection in bed...but even if she tries to gently kind of suggest it he snaps at her, because he's used to video games all night and that's that. I don't think aspies have to be like that in relationships...but you have to work at being able to compromise with another person and consider their needs and wants to. Also it helps to at least be willing to check out their interests that may be different from yours...I know sometimes it can seem intimidating to try something new or get into something new. But also us aspies tend to go on quite a bit about things we're interested in...so it can also be a tactic to help balance it so they feel like you listen to them to instead of just lecturing them about what you like.

But also if you want all your time to be 'you' time, that can be problematic...like a boyfriend/girlfriend doesn't just go away for a time because you're doing your own thing and reappear when you feel like it. Basically you can't really turn off your relationship...you can try but then it tends to just hurt the other person because they feel ignored.

Compromise can be a problem for some Aspies. It can be hard to find a partner who likes and dislikes exactly the same things you do.

Maybe I'm just a terrible aspie but I don't have some rigid schedule to stick to. If I had a girlfriend I'd be happy to make time for her, within reason of course.

This , besides my pre work schedule I don't have any schedules. I just wake up and do something. I'd stop playing single player game to spend time with gf, I have practice few. Nights a week I wouldn't stop then. I dont know that I'd play games as much if I had a gf to be honest I'd rather be spending time with her. Go on walks together maybe

A neurotype alone does little to determine one's potential to be a good partner. As with NTs, Aspies are individuals, and with individuality comes a wide range of worldviews, lifestyles, perspectives, personalities, etc.

So even if we were all affected by AS identically, there would still be very notable differences between us, and how we navigate through the world. But of course Autism is measured on a spectrum, and as such encases a variety of neurological differences to NTs, with individuals being affected in different areas and to differing degrees.

All that said, a lot of us do face similar challenges as it relates to love and relationships more broadly. An impaired ability to read non-verbal cues and lacking social instincts that others have can make connecting with people, and by extension, cultivating relationships more difficult for us.

Certainly not impossible if we can find people who operate similarly or are willing to take the time to understand us, but that too can be difficult sometimes. Especially if others have to make concessions that they don't feel are worth it for them.

Challenges for some Aspies in relationships would run more along the lines of failure to recognise/understand how to meet certain needs of their partner. Again though, it's all very dependent on the individual/s in the relationship.

relationships take work, they just take extra effort when it's with someone on the spectrum, from my pov.

he and i have our challenges but i believe him to be a hugely positive influence on my life. so no, i personally feel it depends upon the people involved.

As long as there have been men and women men have failed to understand women even the nurotypical ones.

Honestly, I think it's tough for the autistic male to pick up on the hints women put out. So yes it will be frustrating to date us sometimes. But we are also very loyal and dedicated partners. Personally, I know if you are my girlfriend that's it there are no other women we are in a relationship and there is a reason I picked you. So in that we are great boyfriends.

In my case it's been almost too loyal because once there is one date or more accurately just hanging out I get very excited. Like it went well (in my mind at least) I am single you are single let's change that because I am very interested in you.

You just have to honest about what is going on with you and have chemistry between the two people.

No I don't think so as general rule.

People are happy are unlikely to come to a forum to talk about their ASD partner. Many of the post complaining are armchair diagnosing based on negative personality traits. Some of them are constructive but many of them are just rants.

A relationship is a two way thing, those that fail to understand what this entails they are going to be a bad partner. Full stop.

Oh trust me it does take work. Sometimes, when you believe you are in a relationship that you have it all together, out of nowhere it turns out that the relationship awkwardly doesn't work as expected. No worries. Believe me, I don't think having autism means that you have an end all to relationships. You have to continue getting back up even though you hit your head hard on the pavement (metaphor).