New here - ashamed of being autistic :(

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Keladry
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27 Aug 2017, 9:54 pm

Chronos wrote:


If the world were populated by those with AS and we were to try to characterize those who are NTs from our perspective, the diagnostic criteria for Neurotypical Spectrum Disorder would describe someone who is socially needy, intrusive, emotional, and easily frustrated.



Haha...maybe we should write the NT DSM criteria for fun!! :D



cfleischmann
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28 Aug 2017, 10:42 am

Hello:

First off, we all come to acceptance sooner or later at our own pace. Secondly, I've been there, done that, and have the t-shirt. Regardless, remember this one-liner from my company's training:

"Autism is different, not less". Or this quote "autism is not a processing error, it's a different operating system"

Hope this helps and have a great day:
CF


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Magpie_01
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29 Aug 2017, 3:32 pm

Chronos wrote:

If you are ashamed then you have a distorted idea of what it means to be on the spectrum, probably one acquired from the false perceptions of NTs, who tend to see anyone not like themselves as being inferior.

If the world were populated by those with AS and we were to try to characterize those who are NTs from our perspective, the diagnostic criteria for Neurotypical Spectrum Disorder would describe someone who is socially needy, intrusive, emotional, and easily frustrated.


Neurotypical Spectrum Disorder :D

@CF: True. I think acceptance is individual and hopefully one day I'll be better at it. Having different operating systems makes a lot of sense. I read somewhere that in individuals with AS, the brain is suspected to be wired differently. (or, for me, extra-differently, I have epilepsy on top of autism :roll: )

Hope you're having a great day!


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cfleischmann
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29 Aug 2017, 3:39 pm

Magpie_01 wrote:
Chronos wrote:

If you are ashamed then you have a distorted idea of what it means to be on the spectrum, probably one acquired from the false perceptions of NTs, who tend to see anyone not like themselves as being inferior.

If the world were populated by those with AS and we were to try to characterize those who are NTs from our perspective, the diagnostic criteria for Neurotypical Spectrum Disorder would describe someone who is socially needy, intrusive, emotional, and easily frustrated.


Neurotypical Spectrum Disorder :D

@CF: True. I think acceptance is individual and hopefully one day I'll be better at it. Having different operating systems makes a lot of sense. I read somewhere that in individuals with AS, the brain is suspected to be wired differently. (or, for me, extra-differently, I have epilepsy on top of autism :roll: )

Hope you're having a great day!



Oh my goodness! I'm trying to stay in my seat at panera to keep from making a scene with my uncontrollable laughter about "Neurotypical Spectrum Disorder"

In addition, form what I've read, autism and epilepsy/seizure disorder is a common combo.

I'm the extra weird one because just in the mental department I am: Autistic, Transgender, Multiple Personalities, PTSD, and have some form of seizure issue the doctors are waiting on MRI for data on it and the EEG results


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30 Aug 2017, 4:46 am

There is no shame in being autistic. Almost everything we know about the universe comes from 2 autistic men. Izzac Newton from my own county of Lincolnshire and Albert Enistien.

Think of the tech industry, engineering it would all fall apart witout us, NT's need us more than we need them.


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PBL187
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04 Sep 2017, 3:46 pm

Magpie_01 It's definitely nothing to be ashamed of. At all.

However, I know where you are coming from, it's more a "why me" or "I could be and do so much more if I didn't have this dragging me down" type of shame, rather than being ashamed of how you appear to other people because of it, which I believe is something that everyone with a mental or neurological disorder(s) has to go through at least once every single day


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06 Sep 2017, 9:23 am

Autism isn't necessarily a shame, but I'm not likely to jump on the "Autism Pride" bandwagon. There are a lot of traits I had that seriously limited my potential and decreased my ability to form friendships when I was younger. Even today, though my executive function skills are good, I still wonder if I will ever be good enough for anyone else to get married.



Magpie_01
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07 Sep 2017, 11:32 am

Voxish wrote:
There is no shame in being autistic. Almost everything we know about the universe comes from 2 autistic men. Izzac Newton from my own county of Lincolnshire and Albert Enistien.

Think of the tech industry, engineering it would all fall apart witout us, NT's need us more than we need them.


Good point :D even though I'm quite careful not do diagnose people retrospectively. I don't know if it's all that useful to be honest.

PBL187: For me it's the other way around. I've been ridiculed for my appearance and voice (which, as I've been told, sounds "autistic," whatever that means), which is a big part of the shame I'm feeling about being autistic.

IstominFan: That's true. I think of acceptance as a compromise between pride and shame? Not sure about that yet. Right now I don't feel "proud" at all and I don't think I'll ever be...


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PBL187
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07 Sep 2017, 12:29 pm

Magpie_01 wrote:
Voxish wrote:
PBL187: For me it's the other way around. I've been ridiculed for my appearance and voice (which, as I've been told, sounds "autistic," whatever that means), which is a big part of the shame I'm feeling about being autistic.


Fair enough, and anyone who ridicules you for that are just ignorant and childish. Easier said than done I know but don't let them get to you


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Magpie_01
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09 Sep 2017, 10:33 am

Thank you :) I'll do my best..


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Patrick_McGuirk
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13 Sep 2017, 10:19 am

Hi there. I just made an account today and this was one of the first posts I found. Let me tell you a bit about myself.
I'm 31. I was 28 when I was diagnosed. I hid my diagnosis from people for a long time because I stigmatized myself. I was ashamed of it.

Within the last 3 years I got my master's in psychology and I'm going for a 2nd master's in technology. When I finally did start telling the people in my life about my diagnosis, I felt free and I didn't feel like it was as much of a burden on me as I thought it would be. In fact I've given a few speeches at my university about growing up undiagnosed autistic. I talked about how my mom took me to doctor after doctor and nobody would diagnose me, they all said it was ADHD. I gained a lot of respect for how I handled my diagnosis in my master's program.

I say when you own your diagnosis with confidence and you are unapologetic about it, nobody will stigmatize you. The worst stigma is self imposed and it seems like you are stigmatizing yourself here. People respect me now that I'm so open about my diagnosis and I talk so freely and honestly about it. I own my asperger's. That's what I think would be best for you. To own your diagnosis with confidence. People will respect that.