How do guys signal interest?

Page 4 of 4 [ 58 posts ]  Go to page Previous  1, 2, 3, 4

funeralxempire
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 27 Oct 2014
Age: 39
Gender: Non-binary
Posts: 25,184
Location: Right over your left shoulder

10 Sep 2017, 2:04 am

wanderlust77 wrote:
I saw the other topic, how do girls signal interest, and I thought why not have the same about guys?
NTs and NDs too.
Guys, help us out here. :) :heart:


I'll concede I'm not sure how exactly I signal interest other than... you know... increased interest?


_________________
"If you stick a knife in my back 9 inches and pull it out 6 inches, there's no progress. If you pull it all the way out, that's not progress. The progress is healing the wound that the blow made... and they won't even admit the knife is there." Malcolm X
戦争ではなく戦争と戦う


Darkrose50
Yellow-bellied Woodpecker
Yellow-bellied Woodpecker

User avatar

Joined: 6 Jul 2015
Age: 49
Posts: 58
Location: Chicago

11 Sep 2017, 8:50 am

sly279 wrote:
Darkrose50 wrote:
I am sure that courtships can be easier for men when they can trade goats for a bride, but modern stuff is cooler.

Try asking a girl out with this like “How many goats do I need to donate in your fathers name for you to agree to go on a date with me?” When she looks shocked, tell her you are old fashioned. I think it is funny, and you may get a date out of it. Deliver it a joke.

At any rate it sucks to be everyone. From what I understand about this anti-feminism stuff is that girls get paid less, and guys get killed in war. Women are viewed as important, and men are meat for the grinder. No woman is going to argue men don’t die in war by the truckloads. This does not mean that they need to accept the lower pay. You would be all “hell no” if you were a girl.

There's no real wage gap. It fails to take into account women work less then men cause baby's, women tend to take more emotional and jobs they like that help people(nursing,teaching, day care etc) men. Tend to do hard labor jobs, more dangerous jobs, doctors etc which brings higher income along with working more hours then most women. If guy works 80 hours and lady works 60 should her yearly income be the same? Then there's experience differences, areas(pay varies depending on location) etc taking all women's pay and averaging it then taking men's pay and averaging it and saying there's a difference doesn't take into account all the variables. Where you might see actual pay gaps is in higher level stuff like ceos or executives . All who make way more then a lot of people so i dont know care that some lady making 1 mill a year makes 200k less then a male in the same job. Yeah if it's based off gender it's wrong and bad but there's more important things then helping the wealthy make more money. Men and women in the middle class and poor get paid the same. Lots of women get paid more then guys in retail and other customer service jobs. Most my bosses were women. Most pay is based off experience and how long ones been with the company. But simply saying women get paid less is false. Now if people want to work to get wealthy women more money go ahead but I won't I'd rather help poor people like myself get a livable income.


All are contributing factors to be sure, but some countries have a larger pay gap than others. One contributing factor is extremely likely to be sex.



Darkrose50
Yellow-bellied Woodpecker
Yellow-bellied Woodpecker

User avatar

Joined: 6 Jul 2015
Age: 49
Posts: 58
Location: Chicago

11 Sep 2017, 9:00 am

Quote:
Especially if one isn't a real man and is as weak or weaker then a lot of women.

I doubt women ever needed help opening doors that's more a she shouldn't have to touch a door if your a gentleman thing. Putting women on a pedestal and all that.


I think the practice has its roots in specialization. I carry stuff because I am stronger than my wife. She can still carry stuff, but it is not as useful use of her time. I can carry all of the groceries at once (less they are bulky items like cases of toilet paper), and it would take her multiple trips. While I carry things she can do something else, like help the kids get a snack, and we save on time, effort, and calories.

I also think that there were heavy poorly engendered doors, and heavy oak benches and such. If doors were heavy and not highly engineered as they are now, and I was with my wife, then I would open the heavy door because it is a specialized task that I am more suited for.

In times past I would have opened more doors and moved more chairs (men tend to have 13% more strength). Strength was once a more valuable resource. Now it does not really save any time, effort or calories to open doors. The practice is mostly useless (as in it does not really save any time, effort or calories). It is still a dating ritual.

It is like if someone was married to someone that is significantly better with computers, then the computer whiz would fix the computers . . . even if the other partner was capable of doing so.



bobchaos
Blue Jay
Blue Jay

Joined: 20 Aug 2017
Gender: Male
Posts: 79
Location: Somewhere between the North pole and South pole

20 Sep 2017, 8:41 am

When I'm interested in a girl, I show it by becoming absolutely terrified of her :P

Modern society has made it really difficult to express interest, sexual or otherwise, because on the one hand it seems everyone assumes it's all about sex (as far as I'm concerned it's entirely secondary to emotional satisfaction) and everyone is afraid of being used (true for both genders) and on the other, as mentioned by others, classic courtship behavior have been made illegal or at the very least are frowned upon.

I'm sorry to say, feminism screwed you over ladies, 'cause now it's on you to show your interest in a guy first. You collectively made it too damn scary and dangerous for us to court you (unless the guy so happens to look like "insert sexy celebrity here").



wanderlust77
Snowy Owl
Snowy Owl

User avatar

Joined: 27 Aug 2017
Age: 26
Gender: Female
Posts: 140
Location: Ireland

20 Sep 2017, 10:05 am

Ok, after reading this thread and the other one about how girls signal interest, my conclusion is basically f#ck it, I'll invite you to do something if I like you. If you freak out that a girl shows interest, then we are not looking for each other.
Case closed. :)



sly279
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 11 Dec 2013
Age: 36
Gender: Male
Posts: 16,181
Location: US

20 Sep 2017, 2:06 pm

wanderlust77 wrote:
Ok, after reading this thread and the other one about how girls signal interest, my conclusion is basically f#ck it, I'll invite you to do something if I like you. If you freak out that a girl shows interest, then we are not looking for each other.
Case closed. :)

Probably good ideas though might try inviting a few times before moving on. Shy guys or especially shy aspie guys who've been tricked by women might not believe the first one.



wanderlust77
Snowy Owl
Snowy Owl

User avatar

Joined: 27 Aug 2017
Age: 26
Gender: Female
Posts: 140
Location: Ireland

20 Sep 2017, 2:14 pm

OK Sly I will invite him a couple of times. Well, yeah when I'm interested I won't take one "no thanks" for an answer :)



The_Face_of_Boo
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 16 Jun 2010
Age: 41
Gender: Non-binary
Posts: 32,872
Location: Beirut, Lebanon.

20 Sep 2017, 3:26 pm

sly279 wrote:
Darkrose50 wrote:
I am sure that courtships can be easier for men when they can trade goats for a bride, but modern stuff is cooler.

Try asking a girl out with this like “How many goats do I need to donate in your fathers name for you to agree to go on a date with me?” When she looks shocked, tell her you are old fashioned. I think it is funny, and you may get a date out of it. Deliver it a joke.

At any rate it sucks to be everyone. From what I understand about this anti-feminism stuff is that girls get paid less, and guys get killed in war. Women are viewed as important, and men are meat for the grinder. No woman is going to argue men don’t die in war by the truckloads. This does not mean that they need to accept the lower pay. You would be all “hell no” if you were a girl.

There's no real wage gap. It fails to take into account women work less then men cause baby's, women tend to take more emotional and jobs they like that help people(nursing,teaching, day care etc) men. Tend to do hard labor jobs, more dangerous jobs, doctors etc which brings higher income along with working more hours then most women. If guy works 80 hours and lady works 60 should her yearly income be the same? Then there's experience differences, areas(pay varies depending on location) etc taking all women's pay and averaging it then taking men's pay and averaging it and saying there's a difference doesn't take into account all the variables. Where you might see actual pay gaps is in higher level stuff like ceos or executives . All who make way more then a lot of people so i dont know care that some lady making 1 mill a year makes 200k less then a male in the same job. Yeah if it's based off gender it's wrong and bad but there's more important things then helping the wealthy make more money. Men and women in the middle class and poor get paid the same. Lots of women get paid more then guys in retail and other customer service jobs. Most my bosses were women. Most pay is based off experience and how long ones been with the company. But simply saying women get paid less is false. Now if people want to work to get wealthy women more money go ahead but I won't I'd rather help poor people like myself get a livable income.



Wage gap exists due to married men, the wage gap between single men and single women is negligible - in fact, single women in some domains earn more than single men.

There's a subconscious reasoning that married men are more in need to take a larger percentage of the salary budget because they assume the married needs it for his family and his wife may not. e working (which is true sometimes); while they always assume that married women to have working husbands earning as her or more (which is...true in most cases).

Note that employers aren't paying more for married men out of their pockets, but at the expense of singles(men and women) and married women.



whatamievendoing
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 20 Aug 2016
Age: 29
Gender: Male
Posts: 1,336
Location: Finland

21 Sep 2017, 7:24 am

Whoa, how did I miss this thread earlier?

I'm honestly not sure how I'd signal my interest. I've never experienced crushes to a severe enough degree (and towards a girl within a reasonable enough distance) to find out.


_________________
“They laugh at me because I'm different; I laugh at them because they're all the same.”
― Kurt Cobain


nick007
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 4 May 2010
Age: 41
Gender: Male
Posts: 27,059
Location: was Louisiana but now Vermont in the police state called USA

01 Nov 2017, 11:27 pm

I go out of my way to be her friend to get to know her better & get closer to her even when it inconveniences me which ALWAYS put me in the just friends category. Or I'd straight up ask/suggest that we do something like hang-our or an interests we both enjoy which ALWAYS ended in rejection


_________________
"I don't have an anger problem, I have an idiot problem!"
~King Of The Hill


"Hear all, trust nothing"
~Ferengi Rule Of Acquisition #190
https://memory-alpha.fandom.com/wiki/Ru ... cquisition