I hate life

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I'm so sick of being on my own. I'm not talking about romance. I wish I had friends. I have 3 good friends, but I can't be around them all the time. We run out of stuff to talk about and we get on each other's nerves if we spend too much time together.

I just can't make other friends. I'm always forgotten about and not included. i just don't feel like trying anymore. There's no point. People don't like me enough to want to spend time with me.


I'm so lonely.

Sending you virtual hugs. I'm in a similar position. I'd thought I was past the point of being lonely due to being socially isolated for so long, but recently I've really been feeling it. I don't really interact in person with anyone other than immediate family these days. I wish I had some advice to offer. I do have plenty of hugs, though.

Im also lonely and bored. Dont know how to help. Just hope you dont get to down on yourself for being lonely because lonelyness is quite a common problem even though it might not seem like it. Lots of people are lonely. Look at how many people come here saying that they're lonely.

Maybe if you have given up on real people you could find comfort in chatting to people online.

I've increased my social circle and met some lovely people by joining clubs which cater for my special interests.
I'm in 2 sports clubs and a hiking club.
Just a thought.

I haven't got a problem meeting people. I have tons of acquaintances, but only 3 ever invite me to join them in anything.

I don't need to keep meeting even more people. The cycle will just continue.

Thanks for the hugs.

I feel a lot like this. I have a few acquaintances but it seems like I can never go further than this. Every time I got in a group, I'm the most isolated person there... it bothers me a lot and drives me to isolation. I don't see much improvement doesn't matter how hard I try. It's tiresome and so limiting to be alone all time.

Dragons give really nice hugs

Yeah who knew

I'm not good at finding comforting words, but I am good at giving hugs (closest I could find to a hug icon. Hah, those arms look like antlers to me )

Ok.
I suppose it doesn't help if I tell you the club people invite me everywhere, not just club stuff but to all their personal social events as well.


Hugs.

So, if you have no problem meeting others and engaging with them, and have plenty of acquaintances, then the component you are missing is (non-romantic) intimacy? It would seem to me that you need to be getting into activities with an intimate predisposition. Support groups? Group therapy circles? These types of situations go past the trivial acquaintance level of smalltalk by their very nature. Perhaps that might be a better sort of environment to look for a deeper connection.

Find it easy to make acquaintances and hard to make close friends? I can empathise. Hugs.

I find it easier to just socialize online. Most offline encounters for me fizzle out after a year so for that reason I don't even bother with most human interaction offline.

(I'm quoting a bit of your text, just so that you'll get a notification of this reply.)

I never wanted friends, just a girlfriend. When I was in junior-high school (pre-secondary school), I wasn't in the least interested in making friends. That probably had something to do with why I got picked-on so much. When you're alone at Juvie-Jungle Junior-High, of course you're a target for the Juvies.

Things would have gone a lot more smoothly for me if I'd participated in academic clubs, &/or extracurricular sports. My dad suggested sports, and I was politely agreeable and noncommittal, but was privately saying to myself, "You've got to be kidding."

In fact once a school counselor told me that i should "...shoot the bull with the guys." I politely agreed again, but why would I want to waste time on them, even if I could successfully pretend to have something to say to them.

To this day, the only friend that I need or have is my girlfriend. ...and, when I was in school, a girlfriend would have been the only friend that I'd have wanted.

(Of course i like to talk to people at this website. From them, I can learn a lot about what happened to me.)

So, what made me unhappy in highschool, and what I regret so much about junior-high, was that I never had a girllfriend in those days.

To me, a relationship is more important than friends.

So, from my perspective, I'd suggest being noticeably unusually nice, showing interest, to a shy, quiet, non-gregarious, and serious guy that you like. ...enough so that he gets the message. If he isn't interested, no problem. (easy for me to say now, when I was always afraid to approach anyone). If he's shy, your friendly manner and unmistakable interest should ease his social fears.

I suggest that that type of guy would be the best and most dependable longterm company for a girl.

What first motivated me to reply was my disagreement with your statement, "I hate life".

As a participant in the philosophy discussion at this website, I had to comment on that.

You can hate the way your life has gone. I hate things that have happened to me, or didn't happen for me. You can hate the circumstances, or how you dealt with them, during part of your life.

But that isn't the same as hating life itself. After all, what you don't like is a lack of life.

The circumstances of our lives (especially including the social disadvantage of Asperger's) are, for me and some others here, certainly a lot less that what we'd have liked. But I sometimes feel as if the important thing is that life was (is?) there, even if I couldn't have it.

I don't think that what happened to me is characteristic of life. I don't even know if someone with my Asperger's attributes always would miss-out on life. Under different circumstances, maybe it's possible to be like me and still not miss early-life. So I don't have to hate or regret the way I am.

I feel that what happens in one life is one life-experience possibility-story, among infinitely-many of them. I feel that "what is" is a lot more than this particular world or this one life. Sometimes I feel that Reality is more open, loose and free than the pessimistic and circumscribed Materialism philosophy would suggest. ...and that missing a life isn't the same thing as missing life. ...as if life is unlimited and isn't something can get used up, or something that you can really miss out on.

Maybe things are really a lot better than what Materialism implies.

Maybe this post is getting just a little off-topic.

Michael829