Don't want to feel invalidated anymore

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K_Kelly
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13 Sep 2017, 8:23 am

I know that nobody on Earth is supposed to live a perfect life, but I have been struggling very much. I have moderate to strong feelings of despair quite frequently. A lot of family or people I work with on this stuff tell me I shouldn't focus on things or something else, even a sort of cop-out. There are also the people online who give me a hard time once in a while.

In my list for life :

1) The world will not end during my lifetime, and we/I will have more confidence in it being that way.
2) My own anxiety/despair itself will be more minimal.
3) I will be able to have success with women where I can feel more confident and widen my pool as much as I can.
4) There are also things like job/income/etc.

I hope I did good with this OP.



C2V
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13 Sep 2017, 10:01 am

That looks like a good list :)
But it's a bit ironic that it's still a list of the stuff you've been obsessing about the whole time, that your relatives and others are telling you you need to forget about. I don't know about the think-about-something-else advice being a copout though. Maybe it's just so simple it sounds that way?
It does work to an extent - I remember replying to you once with some understanding of your issues as I do the same thing, just obsess about the same handful of problems, over and over and over, on an endless repeat loop. I just don't do it at anyone else. I keep it to myself (most of the time ... I hope) because I'm aware of what I'm doing and do try to curb it a bit. If you give in to the obsessiveness, it takes on a life of its own in my opinion. Side-tracking your mind, like breaking the obsession circuit when you catch yourself doing it, can begin to break down the habitual models of thought the more you divert your mind away from thinking like that. Getting into other things that take the place of the obsessions also helps, and could be said to be just thinking about something else.


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kraftiekortie
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13 Sep 2017, 10:06 am

Yep. Good list.

I feel that "some person on the Internet" doesn't really know me---so if I'm criticized by someone on the Internet, I tend to ignore it.