Page 1 of 1 [ 5 posts ] 

Sarahsmith
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 14 Feb 2017
Gender: Female
Posts: 1,926
Location: Canada

19 Sep 2017, 1:07 pm

This is something that has toutured me my whole life. People think that because I dont say hi or talk to them Im being a b***h. No, its just that Im not saying anything. How does that make me a b***h? Whats so wrong with a person keeping to themselves?



shortfatbalduglyman
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 4 Mar 2017
Age: 40
Gender: Male
Posts: 9,709

19 Sep 2017, 1:32 pm

Sometimes some NTs and extroverts act like if someone does not verbally acknowledge, and then engage in a conversation with them, that the AS or introvert is acting like he/she is too arrogant to talk to or otherwise interact with someone. More specifically, the NT or extrovert in question

As an AS and introvert, my impression of NT and extroverts is that they act like they are so important that they have a moral duty to publicly broadcast every thought and emotion going through their precious lil heads



League_Girl
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 4 Feb 2010
Gender: Female
Posts: 27,205
Location: Pacific Northwest

19 Sep 2017, 3:29 pm

Sarahsmith wrote:
This is something that has toutured me my whole life. People think that because I dont say hi or talk to them Im being a b***h. No, its just that Im not saying anything. How does that make me a b***h? Whats so wrong with a person keeping to themselves?


Do you respond when they say something to you or nod your head to knowledge you hear them? If not, then I don't know what to tell you then because I never never heard of that accusation for anyone who is silent and doesn't say much. Instead people just assume you're shy or secretive or might think you're just anxious or worst of all think you are going to shoot up a school if you're in high school because of that stereotype of school shooters being loners and quiet people. That does come from shooters who were shy and quiet and outcasts so some people have turned it into a stereotype.


_________________
Son: Diagnosed w/anxiety and ADHD. Also academic delayed.

Daughter: NT, no diagnoses.


B19
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 11 Jan 2013
Gender: Female
Posts: 9,993
Location: New Zealand

20 Sep 2017, 4:47 pm

It's a question of degree. Someone who talks all the time or not at all is at the extremes of the communication spectrum, and most people aren't. People interpret the silent treatment as someone deliberately ignoring them and trying to hurt them, so if those are not your intentions, you may have to speak with them at least to clarify that you are not intending to be hostile by giving them the silent treatment. They may have trouble believing that however, as communication is the foundation of all kinds of relationships..



starcats
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 30 Aug 2017
Age: 47
Gender: Female
Posts: 531

20 Sep 2017, 9:03 pm

shortfatbalduglyman wrote:
As an AS and introvert, my impression of NT and extroverts is that they act like they are so important that they have a moral duty to publicly broadcast every thought and emotion going through their precious lil heads


Totally agree, I usually feel the same way.

I have a hard time engaging in conversations that don't feel genuine, and hi how are you usually fits that. I've been trying to acknowledge more that most people expect the niceties. Even if it doesn't feel natural to me, remembering to say good morning to the guy in starbucks making my coffee or how was your weekend to a colleague when I don't actually care, is the way they know that I see and recognize them. People want attention.